(Clearwisdom.net) Recently, it has been hard to focus my attention while reading Dafa books, sometimes even for just one minute. I have felt extremely troubled by this.
While reading articles by practitioners on the website, I paid special attention to experience sharing articles related to this. One practitioner resolved his problem by, before reading, asking himself what it was that he was about to read, why he should read it and what kind of state of mind he should have when reading such a book, to truly respect Master and the Fa. As for the constant instances of evil interference, he would clear them away with his cultivated side. I found it to be a very good sharing, so I started to do the same. It seemed to work at the beginning, but not long after, I reverted back to my previous state.
I knew that there were things at much deeper levels hindering me from progressing forward. So I started to look within myself, but I could not find anything. When I wrote down a title for this article, a thought came up, "It is not for the sake of publication that I'm writing this article, but for digging out that deeply concealed selfish mentality." Then, another voice said, "Forget it, it is so time-consuming. It would be better that I spent the time doing a bit more reading."
I realized then that the reason I could not find anything when looking within myself was because that the old forces used the selfishness formed in the marrow of my bones for thousands of years to obstruct and interfere with me. Where is this "selfishness?" It is at the microscopic level. Because of this selfishness, we dropped level by level until we arrived into this human realm, and we have developed many attachments to fame, fortune and sentimentality. If we want to return to where we originally came from, we must get rid of this selfishness. But how can we best get rid of it, and get rid of it most quickly? The way is to study the Fa more, and to study with a calm mind. Only by truly studying the Fa, can we get rid of selfishness. The old forces take advantage of the selfishness that we have not yet eliminated, interfering with our Fa-study in an attempt to preserve what they want. Therefore, to be truly responsible, we must root out our selfishness. Then we can better carry out our sacred mission. We must take notice of selfishness in everything aspect of our daily life. Once it is detected, we should absolutely eradicate it.
I also found that selfishness could prevent us from correctly understanding the Fa. On the surface, we think we are cultivating according to the Fa. Take forbearance, for instance. Some of us demonstrate hearts of immense tolerance, while others grin and bear it, thinking about the De that others must be giving them. When clarifying the truth, some truly place others first and do it with the heart of saving sentient beings, while others do it to gain mighty virtue. Dafa disciples' stepping forward to clarify the truth are fulfilling the mission bestowed upon us to save sentient beings. However, those who have not come forth find such excuses that they have already reached consummation and that they may suffer persecution if they step forward. They feel that all that they have achieved might be spoiled if they cannot maintain righteous belief. Aren't these the same kinds of excuses the old forces damaging the Fa use? What will these selfish mentalities bring to a cultivator, and to sentient beings?
Having a pure outlook and intent will definitely bring about different results than having impure ones. Master pointed out in the article "Digging out the Roots," "From what standpoint you view Dafa is fundamental--this is also what I want to point out to you. During your cultivation practice, I will use every means to expose all of your attachments and dig them out at their roots."
When I discovered the cause of my problem, my head became a lot clearer. "Selfishness," when considered with human notions, is protecting oneself from loss. However, if we look at it from a higher perspective, we can see that it is in fact a demon that can ruin a person.
The above is my personal understanding. Kindly point out anything improper.