(Clearwisdom.net) Recently, the situation in the city that I live in has become quite dreadful. The arrests of practitioners from my city are reported every week on the Minghui (Chinese version of Clearwisdom) website. The Communist agents visited my home just like they did before the Beijing Olympic Games and warned me, "Do not contact anyone outside! Do not have Falun Gong materials. You are in good shape. What if you are arrested?" My relatives also came to advise me, "I heard you are still a key figure. Be careful! Do not keep any materials at home. Do not go out to participate in any activities." For a short while, I really didn't know how to react and just felt bitter. Master is calling us to save more people while the human beings keep warning me. Of course, I clearly understand that we cannot stop the Fa-rectification. However, it is indeed harder and harder. Surveillance devices have been installed everywhere. When Dafa materials are found, all the surveillance devices nearby will be checked. If a material site is found nearby, the known practitioners will be arrested regardless of whether or not they distributed any materials. The Communist Party members have become so irrational that they have totally lost all reasoning. I am known to be a practitioner, so I pondered whether or not I should slow down a little. Just after I had this thought, I had a dream the next morning.
That morning, I got up at 3:30 a.m. as usual. After finishing the five exercises, I started to send forth righteous thoughts and then recited Zhuan Falun for an hour. However, I felt very sleepy while reciting the book and, somehow, fell asleep after reciting just a small paragraph. Then I had a dream.
I was walking on a road with railings on one side next to a pond. I suddenly saw a person drowning in the pond and many people were watching. The pond was not deep but no one tried to save her. I called out loudly, "Be quick! Save her!" Then a middle-age man reacted and pushed the woman to the bank. No one else helped him and no one came to help the woman. I heard another woman crying. She said that was her younger sister and that she was dead. I wondered why no one helped her. Suddenly, I saw the drowning person sit up and spit out a mouth full of water. It was a woman around 30 years old. I called again, "She is alive. Why isn't anyone rushing to help her?" I was still far away from her. I thought of making an emergency call, but when I tried to pull out my cell phone from my pocket, the opening of my pocket became so small that I was unable to even get my hand out. A man was going home to make the emergency call. Another person right beside me pointed to me and called out, "It is not necessary to go home. She is calling." I was more anxious to pull my hand out of my pocket while saying, "I can't make a call. You go quickly." Just then, I suddenly got my hand free and hurried to dial, but there was an invisible cover on the phone and I couldn't make contact with the keypad. The screen displayed incomprehensible messages. I was really anxious and then suddenly I woke up. It was 7:10 a.m. in the morning.
I realized that, in the dream, I had tried to call for others to save the person but couldn't. I was even unable to just make an emergency call in the dream. Indeed, I had a strong attachment to fear. I was afraid of being arrested, losing my salary, and implicating my family members (I had heard a fellow practitioner talking about the official monitoring of three generations of your family in entering the university, joining the military, searching for a job, or job promotions). How could I save people while in possession of so much fear? I remember when I first saw the Shen Yun Performance Arts show this year, I thought it was so wonderful and that I must try to promote it widely to save more sentient beings. I went out earlier and came back late to distribute the DVDs personally. I could distribute more than 20 DVDs everyday to people such as university teachers, artists, college students, cadres, writers, and so on. Most of them were pleased to accept the DVDs. I was very energetic everyday and my righteous thoughts could cover a large field. Once, when I gave a DVD to a local police station, I was a little concerned that I would get caught on the surveillance cameras, so I decided to stay at home for a few days afterward. However, after staying at home, it seemed much harder to distribute any more DVDs. People refused take them or I lost the courage to ask, so I didn't distribute any DVDs for two days. I realized that my attitude was a mirror reflecting myself. If I didn't have strong righteous thoughts, my effectiveness in saving sentient beings would not be strong, either. As a veteran disciple, no matter how the situation has changed in the human world, I should not be deterred. Letting go of the thought of life and death is a divine state; being unable to do so is a human state. Fellow practitioners also encouraged me, "You can see so much through your third eye. Do not hesitate! We still persevere on our cultivation path even though we cannot see anything." That's true. After attaining the Fa, not only did I recover from diseases but also my Tianmu was opened and I saw many scenes in other dimensions. They were so colorful, pure, and exquisite. I often thought of Master's poem "Delusion" in "Hong Yin." I am determined to follow Master to return to those wonderful worlds. Master said in Zhuan Falun, "The entire transformation process of cultivation practice and the transformation process of the body will all occur under the circumstance that you can see or feel them." Indeed, I have had many experiences with this.
When the CCP started the persecution on July 20, 1999, some people gave up the practice. I couldn't understand why they are able to easily give up such a wonderful practice. I had been involved in validating the Fa earlier and had experienced many miracles that enabled me to escape dangerous situations. Master is taking care of me. I often got hints in my dreams or through my Tianmu. Fellow practitioners often said to me, "Master always give you hints on time and you have good enlightenment quality." At that time, since I had strong righteous thoughts, I often posted stickers in noticeable places. I could clarify the truth face to face freely.
Before the Beijing Summer Olympic Games, since I lost my temper easily and had a weakness of always considering myself right, the evil took advantage of this. The police bugged my phone and heard something unimportant. Using what they heard as an excuse, they searched my home. I didn't feel scared and even clarified the truth to them. When they found the Dafa materials, I felt happy for them to be able to see such wonderful information. When I left the evil place, I saw a beautiful glass painting through my Tianmu. I knew it was Master who comforted and encouraged me. I was moved and cried. Ever since I have been able to do the double-lotus position for 40-45 minutes to an hour. Returning home, I found out my family members were worried about me. The attachment of sentimentality put me in an unstable state. When I recall their expressions, I am hesitant and afraid to do anything. Isn't this a good opportunity for me to get rid of the attachment of sentimentality? I have a strong attachment to sentimentality, and if I can pass the test this time, isn't it a good thing?
Master, please rest assured. I'm a veteran disciple and will never disappoint Master. Since I choose to cultivate Dafa, I will continue doing so diligently and energetically. I will do well the Three Things and will not stop or slack off in saving sentient beings.