(Clearwisdom.net) My name is Liang Yan. I was born on October 5, 1986. My father is Liang Lijin and my mother is Yang Xiuqin. When I was a little girl, I witnessed the persecution that our whole family suffered for practicing Falun Gong. This experience caused me a lot of mental anguish and scarred my heart.
Liang Yan
In 1998, my mother began practicing Falun Gong. My mother, who was weak and had many illnesses, benefited from practicing Falun Gong. Later, she introduced it to me, and I began my cultivation of Dafa, too. At that time, I was only 12 years old. I accompanied my mother doing the exercises every day, and we had group Fa study at our home. I studied Fa and memorized Master's articles with other practitioners. On Sundays, I often went to promote Dafa with my mother. I enjoyed it immensely.
At the end of April 1999, many police officers suddenly came to our home, including the chief of Yanwu Police Station and Wang Hui, the Party Secretary of the Commune. They asked me how many people came to study the Fa and then they waited for them to arrive. A short while later, some fellow practitioners came. The police began to register their names. The police also went to our practice site to register practitioners' names. In June, the police started to not allow us to go to the practice site. A few days later, many police came to our home to harass us. Because my mother took the tape recorder to the practice site every morning, the police accused her of being the practice site coordinator and began to monitor my mother. My mother then showed them Master's lectures and told them Dafa is good.
On July 20, 1999, the CCP began to crack down on Falun Gong from all sides. They arrested practitioners on a large scale. My mother went to appeal for Falun Gong at the Fushun City Government and wanted to clarify the truth about the practice because it benefits the country and its people. She wanted to persuade them to release our fellow practitioners that were being detained there. The police arrested my mother and released her after midnight. The next day, the police chief, the political instructor, and Wang Hui, the Secretary of the Commune, brought many people to ransack our home. They took away all Dafa books, videotapes, cassettes, Master's portrait, a video camera, tape recorder, etc. I did not know what was happening and was so frightened that I hid in my mother's arms. A few days later, my mother was taken away by the police and detained for one whole day. My mother told me after she came back, "On July 22, 1999, CCTV news reported that a miner from Fushun City, Liaoning Province, refused to take medicine because of practicing Falun Gong and then passed away." My mother said both she and another fellow practitioner thought that the report was fake, that it was slandering Falun Gong. They decided to verify the facts of that case and discovered that it was not true. The wife of the dead person showed my mother the receipt from the hospital, which said the dead person's younger brother fabricated the case to slander Falun Gong since he wanted to cater to the Communist Party leaders. Because of my mother's discovery, Meng Wei and Zang, the Political and Security Section Chief of Fushun City Criminal Investigation Squad, and officers from Yanwu Police Station arrested my mother and detained and interrogated her for one day. When they released her, they told her that she was forbidden to contact or meet with other practitioners. Otherwise, they would arrest her again. After that, they often came to our home and harassed us. Every day, they would send someone to monitor us. My mother told me, "We are good people and we should not be afraid of them."
In September 1999, my mother went to Beijing to appeal for Falun Gong and clarify the truth. She bought two cases of ramen noodles for me, left me 300 yuan, and told me that she was not sure when she would be able to come back. I cried for a whole day and night and did not want her to leave. But I knew what she was doing was a righteous thing. Dafa was being libeled. Our Master was illegally listed as "wanted." We had to safeguard Dafa and clarify the truth. I had to support my mother, so I took her to the train station. I cried as we walked, since I did not know when she would come back. In my young heart, I felt very hurt and confused. I did not understand why being good would get you arrested and monitored. Since the day the persecution of Falun Gong began, there has been no peace in our home. The police station or the district often sent someone to harass us, which caused the neighbors to gossip behind our backs and look down on us. My school leaders and teachers often asked to talk with me. I spent every class break session in the teacher's office. My classmates, who had good friends of mine before, began to avoid me. I, who was once out-going and optimistic, became depressed and did not want to talk to anyone. Only tears and loneliness accompanied me.
After my mother went to Beijing, my father had to go out to find a job to support the family. I often cried till late at night before falling to sleep. Over a month later, I finally received news about my mother. She had been arrested and sent to a prison. My grandmother, my uncle, my aunt, some other relatives, and I went to visit her. We saw that she had become very skinny and I could hardly recognize her. I could not stop the tears from running down my cheeks. I held my mother tightly in my arms, afraid that she might leave me again. The police dragged me from her and pushed me and my grandmother away. Then they put handcuffs on my mother and pushed her into a police car. I was separated from my mother again, and I did not know how to deal with life in the future.
I did not want to see my classmates' cold and strange looks. I did not want to hear my school leaders repetitively asking me to break ties with my mother. I hated going to school. I hated seeing those cold faces of my classmates and teachers. I could not bear such mental pressure and almost collapsed. My only option was to stop going to school. Therefore, in December 1999, I left school and locked myself at home. During those days, except for going to Masanjia Forced Labor Camp to visit my mother, I seldom said anything. When I saw my mother, the only thing I did was cry. When I saw her, she was smiling and very calm. I felt so sad. I knew that she did not want me to worry about her. She did not say what she suffered in the forced labor camp.
On September 19, 2000, my mother finally came home, and I thought we could live a peaceful life. However, every ten to fifteen days, someone would come to our home to "visit" us. When my mother and I went out, someone would follow us. We felt that we were being monitored every minute of our lives.
In March 2002, my mother was arrested again. Later, she escaped and we totally lost contact with each other. On May 2, 2002, local police and the national security team arrested my father and detained him for one day and two nights. He was beaten and interrogated. The police confiscated our truth clarification materials, DVDs, Dafa cassettes, etc. from our home. I was not at home at the time. When I returned home I learned about it and went to the police station to look for my father. The police said bad words to me, chased me out, and warned me not to say anything to other people, otherwise they would arrest me. They took my father to the homes of my grandmother, uncle, and other relatives to search for my mother, but they did not find her. The police constantly came to our home to harass us and said they would arrest me. I dared not go back home. I could not go anywhere and had to wander around on the streets. I was not able to see my relatives or return home. I had to find a job to support myself. I had to live a homeless life at such a young age.
Due to the CCP's lies and instigation, many Chinese did not know the truth. At some places, the business owners were very bad. When they saw me looking for a job at such a young age, and then found out out that I was a Falun Gong practitioner, they would not give me money for the work I had done, and they would chase me away. I had to ask acquaintances to get money from my father. Since my father was not always at home, sometimes I could not get any money and I had to borrow money from my relatives or friends.
In 2004, my mother finally found me. I went to see her and helped her prepare some truth-clarification materials and accompanied her to distribute those materials and post some fliers. I was very happy. One day we noticed that there was a car monitoring us near the building where we lived. My mother was afraid of causing trouble for me and told me to go to my aunt's home. Later, my mother left that city. Once again I lost contact with her. I missed her very much. When I saw a nearby fellow practitioner, Ms. Liu Yumei, was arrested, I felt very sad and frightened. I was afraid that my mother might be arrested, too. When I was reading the truth-clarification materials, I read those cases about some fellow practitioners who were suffering persecution, and their organs were being harvested while they were still alive. I was so scared that I dared not cry out loud at night. I was afraid that the police might find me and arrest me and I would have the same fate as other practitioners who had their organs harvested.
Once I had a high fever. I stayed in a room by myself. Because I did not have money to pay for electricity, the room was very cold. At night, it was very dark in the room. I did not eat anything for three days. I was afraid that nobody would notice if I died there. I was afraid that my mother might one day leave me and I would never know it. I lay on the bed and looked out the window. I missed my mother. "Mother, where are you?" I fell asleep with tears running down my face. The next day, when I opened my eyes, I realized that I was still alive. Each day I lived in such extreme fear and helpless pain. Each day to me was extremely hard to get through. I did not know how long I could survive this kind of life. I did not know how much more I could endure. That kind of loneliness and desperation nearly drove me to death.....
On New Year's Day 2007, through the Internet, I found out that my mother was looking for me. I was very happy and immediately left a message for her and set up a meeting time. I found out that she had escaped and gone abroad with friends' help. My mother told me that everyone was equal abroad, and people had freedom of belief. At that time, it was nearing the Beijing Olympics and the police were arresting Falun Gong practitioners on a large scale. The police knew that my mother was appealing abroad and was looking for me. They went to my grandmother and relatives' homes to look for me. My grandmother told acquaintances to send me a message, telling me to be cautious, as the police were looking for me. I found my father, and he asked someone to help me get my ID and passport. I said I wanted to see my mother and that I missed her.
On June 26, 2008, my father and I finally left China and went abroad to meet my mother. Ever since that moment when I first saw my mother, I did not want to be separated from her again. Falun Gong has been persecuted for ten years now. I had grown up fromeing b the little girl who desperately needed her mother's love at a young age. These years of persecution and living without my mother caused heart-breaking pain, which can never be made up. I do not want to live a life without my mother or my relatives anymore. Due to the pain I experienced, I can understand what those young children in China are enduring. Many children have lost their parents and have nobody to rely on. In order to help them and stop this persecution, other fellow practitioners abroad and I clarify the truth to people and hope to gain justice and support from the international community to help us stop this persecution.