(Clearwisdom.net) I'd like to share with you a story about searching within on my path of cultivation. By cultivating my mind and searching within, my mother's cultivation state has changed.

My mother is 81 years old. She did not genuinely study or practice Falun Dafa until 2003. She read only Zhuan Falun and read little of Master's teachings during the later days. She seldom clarified the truth, let alone advising others to do the "three withdrawals" (withdrawal from the Chinese Communist Party and its affiliated youth organizations). There was a Fa-study group in our neighboring village. I asked her to go there for a look. She refused to go and would only read the book alone at home. She did not send righteous thoughts at midnight, though she watched TV at that time. I often blamed her for not being diligent.

One day in April when I visited her, she told me that a woman came to her house to ask for some vegetable seeds. The woman originally wanted to go to my mother's neighbor, but mistakenly came to my mother's house. I said, "Of course she knew that an elderly woman would not plant vegetables. She mistakenly came to our house and in fact, it was her understanding side that wanted you to save her. Didn't you advise her to withdraw from the Young Pioneers?" My mother replied in the negative. I said, "I don't blame you for not going out to advise people to do the three withdrawals since you are old. But why don't you save people who come to your house?"

When I went back home in the afternoon, I started to complain about my mother. I then had a thought that I should not complain about her. She is the only one in her village who practices Falun Dafa and she is elderly as well. Why didn't I search within? Even though each time I visited her I shared with her about cultivation, I never treated her as a fellow practitioner. I considered her to be merely practicing to keep fit. She was not willing to read Master's different lectures, so I did not bring the lectures to her. I rarely brought "Minghui Weekly" to her either even though I never missed giving Minghui Weekly to other fellow practitioners. I did not regard her as a true cultivator. As long as somebody studies Falun Dafa, Master will take care of him/her. My mother also had a path that Master arranged. I regarded her to be at the level of fitness. Didn't that keep her from walking the path that Master arranged? I was shocked when I thought about this. Furthermore, was I diligent myself? I hadn't broken through the attachment of sleep so far. I had not reached the stage to advise whomever I met to withdraw either. I was still obstructed by ordinary notions. I was still interfered with by the illusion of sickness from sickness karma. When matters came up, I searched outside myself. I always blamed my mother for not being diligent. I only wanted to change her without thinking about changing myself.

I also found another ordinary thought. I'm an only child and I have a heavy load. Everything was fine as long as she didn't get sick or delay me from doing the three things. What a selfish thought.

The next day, I brought many of Master's lectures to my mother's home and said, "Mother, I blamed you for not being diligent before. I was wrong. I did not treat you as a fellow practitioner. It's not right when I do not advise you to read Master's newer lectures. I do not often bring you Minghui Weekly either. I delayed you from walking the path that Master arranged for you. I was wrong. From now on, you need to read all of Master's different lectures. Watch less TV and read more Fa." My mother said, "Ok, I'll read them. I will stop watching TV. It's all commercials."

After staying a few days with my mother, I went home. My mother asked me where the family of the Fa-study group in the neighboring village was located as she wanted to go there. She said, "Master said that I was wrong to be like this. I need to step out. I can't remember the original words, but it means this." My mother started to study in a group.

Later I went to my mother's house and lived with her for a few days. My mother said, "Write down three names. I advised three people to withdraw from the CCP."

My mother's mental state has changed a lot compared to before. In fact, it took only three weeks. Thank you Master.

May 21, 2009