(Clearwisdom.net) I have suffered much during the almost ten years of persecution by the Chinese Communist Party against Falun Gong. I have lost my home, my family, my work benefits and reputation. In prison, I was humiliated and tortured both physically and mentally. I felt my fellow practitioners were emotionless to my suffering, or even questioned and complained to me about my tribulations. I was upset and felt I was wronged. I thus developed an attachment to receiving sympathy from others.
I didn't realize this attachment until after I heard from different places that a conflict occurred among practitioners because of me. Some practitioners thought practitioner A didn't treat me fairly and concluded that practitioner A was not trustworthy because the practitioner didn't have compassion and sympathy towards me. This also affected the cooperation among practitioners as one body.
On the surface, those practitioners were speaking up for me and showing their support. But looking at it from a cultivation angle, they were in fact taken advantaged of by the old forces. On the other hand, as a cultivator, there must be an attachment I needed to eliminate. I thus found that the attachment to receiving sympathy from others disrupted the cooperation among practitioners.
As a practitioner during the Fa-rectification period, I experienced various forms of interference from the old forces. Still, Teacher is looking after me. Teacher is still helping me and has suffered for me because I haven't been diligent in cultivation. I have no reason to feel pessimistic and ask for others' sympathy.
Without any difficulty or tribulation, how can I cultivate? Teacher has arranged my cultivation path. Anything that happens is not accidental and is for my improvement. As cultivators, any bad things that we encounter should be treated as good things. No matter how things look on the surface, they are always to help us improve in our cultivation.
After I eliminated my attachment to receiving sympathy, the grudges I held onto about fellow practitioners disappeared, and practitioners no longer distrusted each other because of me.
Please point out anything inappropriate.
May 11, 2009
Category: Improving Oneself
