(Shared at 2001 Russia Conference)
Two months before I obtained the Fa
It was a morning in autumn. I looked outside the window and once again failing to control myself, yelled at my son angrily. I had been looking for "Tao" for eight months. I had read a large amount of books on mysticism. I knew that I needed to cultivate my spirit, nurture a good personality, and have tolerance; however, I once again still lost my temper. I looked at the sky, and my thoughts were shouting, "I can't make it, I need a master to help me!"
Two months later I began to cultivate Dafa
Today I obtained Teacher's book. The assistant gave me the book and said, "If you decide not to cultivate Dafa, please return the book to me after finishing reading it." That would be impossible! I have been waiting for such a long time, probably for my whole life. I held the book in my hand; it was the most precious thing in the world. I have a master now! Two months ago when I sincerely called out to Heaven, the miracle occurred. Several days later, my daughter brought me the materials about Falun Gong from one of her friends who is a practitioner. I read Zhuan Falun, and eagerly awaited the time to go to the practice site. Now I have obtained Teacher's Dafa--how lucky I am! When I read Zhuan Falun I feel that I am being linked with the most remarkable and beautiful thing. A wish came to my mind: I will try my best to introduce Dafa to everyone I knew as soon as possible. I will let them know, the Master has come to the world, and the door is wide open. Human beings! You have been waiting for this for thousands of years!
Four months later
Now all my family members are cultivating Dafa: my husband, daughter and son all joined in the cultivation. It is the predestinated relationship that ties us together. I understand now that there are no coincidences, and that I have the answers for many of the questions I had before. I gave Zhuan Falun to everyone I knew and I kept reading the book, Teacher's lectures at experience sharing conferences, and Teacher's articles. I had a hard time learning the movements, but gradually, I gained control of my body. During this period of time, I became aware of what was happening in China. I was very sad and confused: how could this happen. Afterwards, I read Teacher's articles and I understood. No matter how the Chinese government slandered Dafa, it could only make me become more unshakable in walking the path of truth directed by Teacher and make my righteous belief become more determined. As the Spring came, the situation changed very fast. The Moscow Conference was held and then the Ruibinshike Conference. I learned a lot from the speeches given by those who had cultivated Dafa over one year, and from the speeches I heard at the Moscow conference. In addition, we gathered together and I found out that there are quite a few practitioners in my city. Since May we have been practicing the exercises in the park three times a week. My social circle is quite small. Even though I gave the book to everyone I knew, I still felt that I did too little to promote Dafa. So ever since we decided to practice outside, I made up mind that I wouldn't miss even once. This is one thing I can do to promote Dafa. People keep coming by to take our materials and read. However, no one has been joining us. In the beginning, I was sad for the fact that both people that I know and don't know are indifferent to Dafa. I became calm later--one chooses his own way. We can only promote Dafa to them and expose the vicious persecution of Dafa practitioners in China.
In the beginning, I worried about possible interference that may occur when I practiced in the park. As time went by, I realized that my worrying was unnecessary: no one was rude or violent toward us. People were just curious or unconcerned, and those were normal reactions. Some kids laughed at us, but we were not disturbed by that at all. The negative reports that came from China in newspapers or on TV did not make people uneasy about our peaceful group. At least, people did not harass us because of the reports. We were pretty happy about that.
At the end of May, I saw a beautiful scene in a dream: it was nighttime, in the quiet ocean, and a Bodhisattva was sitting with her back toward me. Glittering with golden light, her figure was perfect. She was doing something in the front, but I could not see what she was doing. All I knew was that she was washing something. I felt peace and beauty. The dream was so unusual that I could not forget it. Two days later, we received new materials from the Internet. In order to reduce the persecution against Dafa and Dafa practitioners, Teacher Li asked practitioners all over the world to send forth righteous thoughts. Teacher Li said in "Teaching the Fa at the 2001 Canada Falun Dafa Cultivation Experience Sharing Conference", ".... It's not only you who does the eliminating; if a cultivator can't eliminate it, Gods--including higher Gods--also need to take part in eliminating it." I immediately thought about the miraculous dream and understood what the Bodhisattva was doing. From then on, the light by the windows of our home was never turned off before 3 AM on Sundays. Together with all Dafa practitioners in the world, we eliminated the evil. We are together as one. The feeling of being a Dafa particle was truly great.
At the same time, this is a process of cultivation and eliminating karma. Based on my true nature, it is easy to overcome my shortcomings. For instance, Teacher said in an article, "Forbearance is the key to improving one's xinxing. To endure with anger, grievance, or tears is the forbearance of an everyday person who is attached to his concerns. To endure completely without anger or grievance is the forbearance of a cultivator." ("What is Forbearance (Ren)?" from Essentials for Further Advancement ). After I read the article, my relationship with my son changed. I no longer force him to do things according to my will, but rather, I concentrate on things that expose my attachments and incorrect notions. Teacher has made me understand in this way that I must firmly eliminate these bad things.
During the group study and group practice, sharing experiences with my fellow practitioners helped me a lot in my cultivation. When summer was over, we were getting so used to the group study and practice that we felt sorry for those practitioners who stayed at home and cultivated by themselves. They did not experience the great feelings of respect and compassion at our small but peaceful practice site. At the practice site, your questions would be answered, and fellow practitioners would remind you of what Teacher had said in a certain book or article, and what their understandings were. The pure field of group cultivation can help us quickly eliminate the human notions that we have obtained in the ordinary people's society and improve rapidly. I hope that all my fellow practitioners can fulfil their solemn vows of participating in Fa rectification and reach consummation.