My name is Nicolas Schols. I obtained the Fa in June of 1999. Time has gone by quickly since then. No less than two weeks after I attended the lectures, I saw a news release on the BBC, wherein our Teacher and Falun Dafa were pictured as something bad. I recognized the gap between ordinary people's understanding of Falun Dafa and the understanding of a practitioner, even though I didn't immediately know how to deal with it. I could feel that the media was being misused by the evil. Although it was something very vicious, I also felt it was a fundamental test, like a thousand beings were gazing into my heart.
Months flew by and I started to participate in Hongfa (promotion and spreading of Fa). In October of 1999 I read for the first time, "A Dialogue With Time." Initially it sounded too strict to me, and I considered it a test for my Xinxing. As I continued studying the Fa, my understanding gradually changed, and I became touched by Teacher's compassion. I realize now how shallow my understanding of the scripture's inner meaning was. When I read this scripture now, I feel that during my whole cultivation, Teacher, together with all those practitioners who met with the standard, have been waiting for me patiently, enduring hardships for me, and forgiving me for my mishaps. Now almost two years have passed, and there are still so many things for me to give up. With their benevolent hearts, practitioners in China have pushed the time beyond the limits of forbearance. They have established such a huge and majestic virtue, something never seen on earth throughout history. And yet, they are still waiting for me to wake up within, and get rid of everything.
It was May tenth, 2000, and I was on my way to a Falun Dafa group reading when I turned my bike around the corner of the street where I live and got hit by a car. I remember I felt very comfortable while flying through the air. First I saw a spark of sunlight, and then it was dark before me eyes. When I opened them again, I was lying on the street, three meters away from the car's bumper. My bike was smashed and even further down the street. While I stood up, I was very calm and somehow wondered whether the driver was okay. When he got out of the car, he was petrified, and I had to calm him down. The bike was a total loss, and my head had banged into the car's windshield. It was crushed and had taken the form of a bowl at the place where my head had hit. But my body was not hurt at allexcept for a very small scratch here and there, and some insignificant bruises, which I discovered afterwards. Just as Teacher said, "What is owed must be paid for. Therefore, some dangerous things may occur in the course of cultivation practice. When these things take place, however, you will not be scared, and neither will real danger be allowed to happen to you." (Zhuan Falun) Three ladies rushed over, yelling: "Did you see this!? It's unbelievable! You're hurt, son, you have to go to the hospital." I told them I was okay, but they kept on trying to persuade me that I was in shock, and that I would be hurt the day after. After they gave me their phone numbers and made sure I had the driver's insurance number, they let me go. I carried my bike back home and went to the group reading on my dad's bike.
Right after the car accident, I had another Xinxing test. The driver didn't want to pay for the damage of my bike, and yet, my parents were pressing me to finish this matter as soon as possible. In the end, he cheated me. Actually, when I looked inside, I could see that I was caring about this material loss. Teacher had saved my life, and yet, I cared about a new bike! How could I be so selfish? And yet, this is indeed the kind of thought that comes up when my personal interest is at stake.
The thoughts coming up in this event in my personal cultivation are similar with the restraints I am still encountering in my validation of the Fa. It was perfectly clear to me that I was saved by Teacher, yet I still could not get rid of my human desires, and in the same way I sometimes cannot overcome my deeply rooted selfishness when confronted with things to be done in order to validate the Fa in the human world. I cannot take advantage of this sacred opportunity, which Teacher has offered me. I am hiding myself behind human arguments, and postponing everything. Now I understand that "meeting the requirement" is not something I can acquire for free, but must be obtained by striving forward vigorously. Time is moving faster, the tests are becoming tougher, and the requirements are higher than before. I have been lost for years in this material environment, fooling myself and deceiving others, and now everything should happen at the same time: studying the Fa, getting rid of all the dirty things in my life, validating the Fa, ?If I don't wake up now, when will I get another alarm clock?
This current environment puts a high requirement on the cooperation among practitioners. Some practitioners have problems with stepping forward, and others step forward firmly. Sometimes the understanding of the current requirements also differs. That's why I think the Minghui website is good for orientation in our cultivation. A few months ago, I wondered whether Minghui wasn't too much of an "authority" to be followed, as though Minghui editors were telling practitioners what to do. But I now realize that Minghui is open to all suggestions and criticisms. It is also edited with the pure heart of practitioners who consider it their duty to inform the people of the world, and to help practitioners communicate with each other. It is not to be taken as absolute, but to be examined seriously. Teacher said, ""It is not that Minghui Net does not make mistakes; however, on important matters, practitioners must watch the position of Minghui Net."
There are a lot of issues we have to enlighten to by ourselves during the Fa-Rectification, and many situations expose our impure hearts. I came to realize that when our attachments are not thoroughly abandoned, even our supposedly good intentions turn out to shock others and produce the opposite effect. For example, while on the surface we are helping others to break through this human shell, deep inside we are using the old and crooked methods of criticizing others and putting pressure on them, instead of truly using our compassion to make them understand the importance and weight of the current moment. At a lecture in Singapore Teacher said, "When a person talks to another without any personal views and concepts, and when he points out another person's shortcomings or tells him something, this person will be moved to tears." In this aspect, I should learn to be more compassionate towards others, and look inside first when a problem occurs.
During Hongfa activities, I have difficulties with asking people to clarify the truth. However, when I manage to break through this, I can feel the power of the Fa. If the Fa is cherished in our hearts instead of being restrained by our humanness, this environment can be truly rectified. For a long time I felt I shouldn't come to the experience sharing conferences, because of not being diligent enough in my cultivation, and thus not deserving to attend such a solemn event. This was due to my lack of understanding of the purpose of the Fahui (Falun Dafa experience-sharing conference) and the benefit for our personal cultivation. I think it was also my demon nature interfering with my cultivation, using its own existence as an excuse to prevent me from further improvement through sharing my experiences with others. Indeed when I meet with so many practitioners and see their enthusiasm, I understand there is still a lot for me to give up. This positive environment is a great encouragement to make further advancement. A lot of us who went to the New York Conference in October 2000, or to the Hong Kong Conference in January 2001, or other Conferences, have felt how solemn these moments were, and the importance of our presence. On the surface it was just a gathering of people in yellow t-shirts, peacefully demonstrating and distributing flyers, but all practitioners present there knew that we were validating the Fa in this human world, which is a most magnificent deed. In Teacher's lecture at the Great Lakes Conference in North America, Teacher said, "when we're clarifying the truth, we're eliminating some people's evil thoughts towards Dafa. Haven't we saved them at least when it comes to this? Since in the process of your clarifying the facts there are people who obtain the Fa, not only is that sin of theirs eliminated, but at the same time you will have also saved them. Doesn't this show that you've done something that's more benevolent, something even better? In extremely difficult situations and when the most evil beings act most viciously, we're still able to be so benevolent -- this is the performance of the most extraordinary gods. When we're enduring the worst suffering, we're still saving others."
I am very glad I was present at those events, and so I am coming again to Geneva.
I hope I can improve more from my previous mistakes and from other practitioners' understanding. I will try to be more compassionate towards others as well as to myself, and wish you all the best in your future cultivation and "Jian Xiu DaFa Jin Sui Shi" Finally, I will recite Teacher's two poems to end my experience sharing.
XUE FA DE FA, BI XUE BI XIU, SHI SHI DUI ZHAO, ZUO DAO SHI XIU Solid Cultivation
"Study Fa, obtain Fa; Compare your study and your cultivation; Everything you do should be measured according to the Fa; Meet the requirement [until completion] -- that is cultivation". SHENG WU SUO QIU SI BU XI LIU DANG JIN WANG NIAN FO BU NAN XIU
Non-existence To live with no pursuits, To die with no regrets; Extinguish all illusory thoughts, Cultivating Buddhahood is not difficult.
Thank you.