(Clearwisdom.net) The following are excerpts from a diary written by a new practitioner in Jilin Province who just started practicing Falun Gong several months ago. She affirmed: "Every word is from the bottom of my heart, not a single sentence is made up, and it is all true." She titled this article, "My Testimony."
On February 16, 2004, I was diagnosed with "cirrhosis of the liver with ascites." I had already been hospitalized for over one month for it at the end of 1998, and had spent more than 20,000 Yuan on medical expenses. So I asked the doctor, "Is there hope for my condition?" The doctor said: "You need to be mentally prepared. I suggest you budget 30,000 Yuan for treatment in the hospital." I got a prescription for one month's supply of medicine and went home. I went to my neighbor who practices Falun Gong and asked him: "I want to practice Falun Gong. Can you please teach me?" That's how I got started, practicing Falun Gong since March 17, 2004, while taking medicine. I felt my health improving day by day. Each day I excreted foul things from my bowels several times a day. After one month, I felt very well and stopped taking medicine altogether. I persisted in doing the whole set of exercises every day. Practicing the fifth exercise, the sitting meditation, was very difficult. I had to clench my teeth to endure the pain. But Teacher Li said to keep it up, "It's hard to endure, but you can endure it. It's hard to do, but you can do it." (Zhuan Falun) So every day when I do the sitting meditation, I think of Teacher Li's words and tough it out even though it hurts a lot. I am determined to follow Teacher's words and the principles of "Truth, Compassion and Tolerance," and be strict with myself. I am now a practitioner and should no longer conduct myself like an everyday person. I truly feel the goodness of Dafa.
April 21, 2004
Since April 25, I started doing the sitting meditation for one hour. Afterwards I cried so much that I could not see well. At times, I wasn't even aware that I was crying. I cried like it was so sad, and the more I cried the more I wanted to cry. I did not know why. My legs hurt so much during the sitting meditation. It hurt more than childbirth. But I felt very comfortable and relaxed afterwards.
Dafa is truly magnificent. My chronic ailments are all gone. Before practicing, I weighed 140 Jin (approximately 156 pounds; 1 lb. = 0.9 Jin) because of the ascites. After practicing for only one and a half month, I lost 3 Jin. I no longer feel bloated after each meal. My bowel movement is good now. All the accumulated fluid in my abdomen is also gone. I feel wonderful! I will persevere in practicing even if it means more hardships. For such a good practice, why not? I feel better day after day. My mood is uplifted from one day to the next. Before, I had even contemplated suicide because of my unbearable sicknesses. Apart from kidney stones, peripheral neuritis, etc., life was miserable. If I did not have my son, I would have been gone long ago. After learning Dafa, I changed my view of life. I no longer abuse others or commit wrongdoings; instead I always consider others. Before I do anything, I tell myself: "I am a practitioner. I cannot do anything I should not do." Teacher Li said: "One Standard Alone Determines if Someone is Good or Bad: Whether He is Able to be True, Good, and Endure." (Zhuan Falun, 2003) I will follow Teacher's words and truly and steadfastly cultivate myself.
April 27, 2004
I have practiced for over one month now. It is truly "working the body and tempering the will." My legs feel much better as the days go by. They no longer feel numb, and I also sleep better now. I used to be afraid of nightfall because my whole body would ache at night. My son came home on the May 1st holiday, and was stunned to see me because I had changed so much. After learning that all my diseases have been cured, he told me: "Dafa is so wonderful. I won't oppose it, and you should continue to practice." (I had once mentioned to him over the phone about my practicing Falun Gong. He was against it at that time.) He had always worried about my health and called me every day to enquire about it. Now everything is fine. He no longer needs to worry about me. My younger sister is also amazed to see the change in me. I know that cultivation is not child's play. It is very serious. Not everyone can do it. Without a true yearning for cultivation, one cannot succeed. It is hard. I cried for over one and a half months, and still cry when I do the sitting meditation. But I am healthy now, and I am happy, and all my family is happy for me.
May 8, 2004
It has been two months since I started practicing Dafa. I cleaned out all the messy books [that are not in accordance with the principles of Falun Dafa] at home. I sold some of them and burned the rest. I don't know why it felt more painful than ever today when doing the sitting meditation. Fellow practitioners advised me to stop crying, and suggested that I look within for the problem. I think they are right. Crying is also an attachment. Although it is very painful, I am unable to suppress my feeling of gratitude to Teacher. I want to say a thousand thanks, and that Teacher is the most magnificent. Dafa has saved me and renewed my vitality. Before, I was very selfish. Now that I have learned Dafa, I think of others first. Whatever I do, I regard myself as a cultivator and follow the standard in word and deed. I practice and study the book every day. I have read the book four times now and I like reading it more and more. Before, I would have a headache whenever I picked up a book. Now my eyes don't even hurt. I will treasure Dafa.
May 17, 2004
I am very happy today as I lost two more Jin. Dafa is wonderful. People would never know it if they do not practice it. Now I know I will do one thing: that is to follow the principle of "Truth, Compassion and Tolerance."
Practitioners are so kind. They never ask for return when they help others. For example, the practitioner who taught me the exercises has a full time job and is very busy. But he would come over every day after work to teach me. He also gave me the videotapes and Dafa books. I wanted to invite him for dinner to thank him. But he said: Teacher says to teach anyone who wants to learn. There is no recompense involved. You do not need to thank me. Do what you should, studying the Fa and practicing conscientiously is better than anything else. We do this voluntarily and do not ask for return.
My legs still hurt. To be honest, one of my legs was rather stiff and I thought it was due to a stroke, so I went to the hospital. The doctor told me that it was unlikely. After reading the book, I realize that it is karma being eliminated. So I am no longer afraid and continue to practice.
Several times my legs hurt so much that I could not sit for the whole hour. After studying the Fa, I understand that I should bear the pain. I told myself: pain cannot discourage me. I will persevere in practicing.
May 25, 2004
Today is Teacher's birthday. I want to say: Dafa is wonderful. I will continue to practice and study the Fa. Teacher, I cherish the Fa with all my heart. I will safeguard it. Dafa has given me a second life. I will follow your words and never do anything to cause damage to Dafa. I will watch my every word and deed and keep Dafa in mind whatever I do.