(Clearwisdom.net) I started practicing Falun Dafa in August of 1997. Even though I am a veteran practitioner, I have not been doing well with regard to truth clarification work. It seemed that I had very few breakthroughs in clarifying the truth. I studied the Fa and continued reading experience-sharing articles from Clearwisdom. Nevertheless, I always felt that I didn't have enough wisdom when it came to doing truth clarification work. Some days I would talk to people about Falun Gong or pass out flyers. When the next day came, however, I would again feel empty-minded and didn't know what else to do. When I was at home, my mind would be full of all kinds of truth clarification ideas. As soon as I stepped out the door, I just couldn't open my mouth when a stranger approached me, or the overall effects of my truth clarification work turned out to be not as good as expected.
Today, when I was reading Teacher's article "Explaining the Fa During the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference," one paragraph struck me and opened my mind completely. Teacher said:
"Remember: Wherever a problem occurs, that's where you need to clarify the facts. (Applause) As for whether the result is good, don't look at the other party, it comes from your minds. If you want it to be good then it will be good. And if you don't intend to make it good, or if your mind is unsteady, then it won't be easy to rectify things. In other words, you need to have strong righteous thoughts. If you're thinking, 'I'm truly saving you. I'm truly telling you the facts,' then the result will be good."
This teaching made me realize the problems in my mind that had caused my poor performance in doing truth clarification work.
First, I was seeking immediate results and paying too much attention to the other party's receptive attitude when clarifying truth. Now that I began to think more about it, it appeared to me that I was actually outwardly seeking. I was trying to show myself off, and that was selfish in nature--my heart was not cultivated. As a matter of fact, whatever we are doing, the teaching that "the cultivation is up to you, gong is up to the master" (Zhuan Falun) should always apply.
Second, I didn't have a steady heart when I was clarifying the truth. I was under heavy influences of my own emotions and notions, and my righteous thoughts were not strong enough. This was actually a reflection of my slacking off in Fa study. It was due to my wavering determinations towards the Fa and my unsteady belief in Teacher.
Third, my human notions were not removed. Before cultivation, I was an introverted person, who was wary of strange people, and I didn't like to talk at any occasion. I was a shy person. Now, I began to think that these were human behaviors that may have been meticulously arranged by the old forces a long time ago. The old forces just wanted to block me at this critical moment so that I couldn't fully accomplish the job of "assisting the Teacher to rectify the Fa" as a true practitioner should during Fa-rectification. As a result of these old forces' arrangements, many sentient beings are in jeopardy of not being saved.
As I started to recognize all these problems within myself, those degenerated fields around me that had caused such interference automatically disappeared. I felt like my heart was relieved of a monstrous burden. I felt like I had become another person. Through this incident, I came to understand more clearly the importance of studying the Fa. I also experienced the teaching that "The Fa can break all attachments, the Fa can destroy all evil, the Fa can shatter all lies, and the Fa can strengthen righteous thoughts." ("Drive Out Interference") I'd like to thank our honorable Teacher who has mercifully awakened me. I will strive forward with even more diligence.