(Clearwisdom.net) Recently my cultivation state has not been very good. Even though I was still doing the three things, none of them was done well. In the past, I memorized the Fa and I could cover more than ten or twenty pages in one day. But now I can only memorize one or two pages and sometimes only one paragraph per day. In the past I did really well in sending righteous thoughts. I often calmed down and concentrated to send out the righteous thoughts. My body felt warm and there was a strong energy field around me. Now my mind often wanders and I can’t focus on what I am doing. Sometimes I even fall asleep. I have been doing a poor job on truth clarification as well compared to how I have done before.
I asked myself, "What is wrong with me?" I could not understand it for a long time. Recently, I suddenly realized my shortcoming through a casual conversation with a friend.
Two days ago, a fellow practitioner asked me to help her with some computer work. When it was done, that person said, "Thank you." I replied, "You are welcome. We all work for Dafa." As soon as the words came out of my mouth, I realized that I was wrong. How can we claim that we "work for" Dafa? Master has once said,
"The real purpose of all those things you do is for you to succeed." ("Fa-Lecture During the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference")
This one casual sentence actually reflected my state at that moment. When speaking of doing things for the Fa, it fundamentally came from my own selfishness and doing things for oneself. I then asked myself, "What is my main purpose when I do things?" I finally realized that my not-so-diligent state was due to my wanting to do things for my own "self interest." When I recalled my previous good state, I remembered that I really did things based on the Fa and wanted to save sentient beings from the bottom of my heart.
The mission for Dafa disciples of the Fa-rectification period is to aid Master in the Fa-rectification and to save sentient beings. Our lives are fostered from Dafa cultivation so they should be pure and righteous. We are the enlightened beings of "no self" and "no me," always thinking of others before oneself. How can we think we are doing things for Dafa? These are things that we should do, and it is for our own great consummation. Actually it is Master helping us, not us helping Master. We are disciples who are supposed to aid Master and we are the hope for human beings. Only when we do things based on the Fa can we really save sentient beings.
When I realized my shortcoming, my state of mine when sending forth righteous thoughts just now was quite different. I was able to calm down again and concentrate my thoughts. I felt that my energy field was stronger than before. Fellow practitioners, let's hurry up to dig out our fundamental attachments and eliminate them quickly. We must well what we should do.
I hope that those whose mental states are similar to mine can also think about the root of their problem. Is it just like mine? This is only a shallow understanding I have to share with you. Please kindly point out any inappropriate thoughts.
