(Clearwisdom.net) During these several years of Dafa practice cultivation, I have experienced some profound lessons and some realizations based on righteous thoughts and righteous deeds. Therefore, I have written down some of my understandings to share with other practitioners. If there is anything improper, please kindly point it out.
1. Steadfast Belief in Dafa and Eliminating Fears
I was arrested before the 2004 Chinese New Year because I was still afraid, impatient, not rational in my thinking and self-centered while I validated the Fa. Although Master saw my omissions and revealed them to me, I still did not heed them.
After the arrest my mind became clear and I calmed down. I refused to cooperate with any of the evildoers' orders or provocations. I not only did not tell them my name and address; I also went on a hunger strike the day of my arrest. I clarified the truth to the officers at the local police station, practiced the exercises, sent forth righteous thoughts and shouted, "Falun Dafa is good!"
Two days later the policemen found my residence and then took me to a detention center. I still did not cooperate with them. I refused to wear the prison uniform, refused to count off and squat beside the wall as other ordinary prisoners did and kept reciting Master's writing by heart:
"A Great Enlightened Being does not fear hardship
Having forged an adamantine will
And with no attachment to living or dying
He walks his path of Fa-rectification openly and nobly"
("Righteous Thoughts and Righteous Actions")
"No matter what the situation, do not cooperate with the evil's demands, orders, or what it instigates. If everyone does this the environment won't be this way."
"Are you a Falun Gong," a guard asked me. "Yes, I am," I replied. Then he told me, "Ok, you need not be photographed."
Because I refused to wear the prison uniform in that detention center, they handcuffed me for three days. I asked the prisoners whether there were any other Falun Gong practitioners in the detention center, and if they had told them the truth about Falun Gong. They said no. Then I began to clarify the truth to them. More than 20 people were in my cell. I talked with each of them individually and also spoke with the young guard who handcuffed me.
On the third day the police transferred me to another cell. An older guard was in charge of the cell. He did not make me put on the prison uniform and also did not handcuff me. Then I recited the "Fa," practiced the five sets of exercises and sent forth righteous thoughts with my palm erect every day. No one disturbed me. There were more than 30 people in this cell. I again clarified the truth to each of them. I told them not to keep on committing wrong deeds anymore after being released, to be a good person and frequently say, "Falun Dafa is good!" The cell leader (the head prisoner in the cell) even told me, "When I get out, I also want to read Zhuan Falun." On Chinese New Year's Day, the older guard asked me to sing a song for everybody. Thus I sang, "Falun Dafa is good!" After that the old guard told the cell leader to give me two apples.
The prisoners had to recite the prison regulations and be on night duty every day. I did not recite the regulations; neither had I to be on duty. I used to tell the cell leader that I must send forth righteous thoughts at 12o'clock every night. Although I had never wanted to be awakened at midnight by anybody, the cell leader told each prisoner on duty to wake me up on time.
Because I did not cooperate with guards when they violently force-fed me, my nose and mouth bled when they inserted the tube. At the time, I was reciting Master's Fa, and the tube came out. After these events I realized if I asked for Master to help me and to let my body appear to have symptoms of approaching death, I could get through. But I knew at that time that I still felt fear.
Thus, after holding me in the detention center for a few days they transferred me to the City Labor Camp.
2. Put down the concern for life and death; break the old forces' arrangements
Master said,
"An article published on the Minghui website described a student who told people the facts about Dafa and shouted "Dafa is good" wherever she went. "No matter where they take me, I'll ignore everything the vicious policemen say, and no matter how violently you beat me or how terribly you swear at me, I'll remain just as I am." The labor camp was so scared that they sent her back in a hurry--'We don't want her.' It's because they figured, 'We won't be able to convert her, and on top of that she'll influence a large number of people.' (People laugh) And they won't be able to get a bonus, either. (Applause) They had no way to handle it--where could the local police station put her? They had no way to handle it, so they sent her home." ("Teaching and Explaining the Fa at the Metropolitan New York Fa Conference")
So I became determined that I would steadfastly trust Master and trust Dafa. I would keep on going straight down the path of Fa-validation. However, when I arrived at the labor camp gate, I was a little afraid, and went in without shouting out anything such as, "Falun Dafa is good."
In the labor camp, those collaborators gave me ample food and other things, but I did not talk with anyone for several days. I saw that all the practitioners in this camp were wearing the labor camp uniforms, but could not find practitioners like those who helped me and supported me in the past. I began to cry. It was a real test for me, and the pressure was huge.
During the nights in that place Master continually revealed things to me. I dreamed a lot of people were buried, with only their head or hands exposed. Master stood nearby,with tears running down his face. Then I saw the great and boundless ocean. There was a desk on the beach. Master was sitting at the desk holding a pen, looking seriously at a distant point, and waiting for someone. I walked toward Master. When I nearly got there, a TV set appeared. Then suddenly it was on fire and disappeared. This did not spook me and I kept walking toward Master. After I woke up from the dream I realized that Master was waiting for me, waiting for all practitioners. I really had come to the world with a mission to accomplish.
"When it looks impossible and is said to be impossible, give it a try and see if it is possible. If you can actually do it, you will indeed find: 'After passing the shady willow trees, there will be bright flowers and another village ahead!'" (Zhuan Falun from the 2000 translation version)
That day at noon, all the other practitioners went to lunch. The guards did not let me go, because I refused to put on the prison uniform. When all the people came back, there were a lot of people standing on the playground. I suddenly rushed to the window, opened it and shouted out from the bottom of my heart to those practitioners outside, "Falun Dafa is good! Master is waiting for us! Don't let the thousand years' predestined opportunity pass us by!" A former practitioner who had become a collaborator hauled me to the bed and punched me twice. Then a male guard kicked and burst open the door, raised his arm and slapped my face. I was shocked but did not feel hurt. I immediately reminded myself that I am a Dafa disciple in the Fa-validating period, and that I am Master's disciple.
Master said,
"Indestructible righteous faith in the cosmos's Truth forms benevolent Dafa disciples' rock-solid, Diamond-Like Bodies, it frightens all evil, and the light of Truth it emanates makes the unrighteous elements in all beings' thoughts disintegrate. However strong the righteous thoughts are, that's how great the power is. Dafa disciples are truly stepping forward out of ordinary humanness." ("Also in a Few Words")
After I quickly recited Master's words, everything became peaceful. That guard looked at me for a few seconds, and then he turned around and left.
Once again a group of guards and collaborators wanted to beat me. I was still reciting Master's Fa by heart and peacefully looking at them. A guard asked a collaborator, "Was that her shouting?" The collaborator said yes. Only the male guard punched me once. Then all of them left. From then on I trusted Master even more. I saw how holy and magnificent Dafa was and how great Master is. This time they extended my term for another half year, but I did not care.
After that I shouted, "Falun Dafa is good" every day to support the other practitioners, and also to make the evildoers stop persecuting Dafa disciples. I did not heed all the regulations of the camp; neither did I obey them. I totally denied the arrangement of the old forces. When the guard, notorious for his bad reputation of beating and torturing Dafa disciples with electric batons, ordered me to put on the prison uniform I told him, "I am my Master's disciple! I only do what my Master wants me to."
The guards wanted me to work with ordinary prisoners, but they were still fearful I might "influence" those practitioners who were "transformed," and afraid that we would become a unified entity to shock the evil. My shouting for Dafa made them unable to tolerate any more.
My lower limbs were swollen. I am a doctor, so I know that conventional knowledge perceives swelling in the lower extremities as a sign of heart disease. But I had no heart disease. Therefore I went with the flow and began breathing deeply and heavily, which prevented the guards from gagging me. They had no choice but to transfer two other practitioners and me to the provincial labor camp three months later.
3. With Righteous Thoughts and Deeds, I Walked Out of the Camp
Inside the police vehicle I kept telling the police the truth about Dafa. I told them to treat Falun Gong practitioners well, and that they should stop persecuting Falun Gong so they would secure a good future for themselves.
Upon arriving at the provincial labor camp, I shouted out, "Falun Dafa is good." I kept doing so from the entrance all the way to the cell. One team head and two collaborators said, "This one is not easy!"
In order not to interrupt the others' afternoon nap (note: it is customary in China to have a nap in the middle of the day, even at work), I shouted out loud, "Falun Dafa is good," after the three daily meals. When fellow practitioners were being force-fed, I shouted out "Falun Dafa is good." I also did so when the guards persecuted other practitioners, and when the loudspeakers broadcast anti-Falun Gong programs. I also did so when new practitioners arrived at the labor camp. I shouted out "Falun Dafa is good," at least ten times and sometimes dozens of times a day.
It felt as if salvos of bullet came out of my mouth when I shouted out "Falun Dafa is good," and the vicious people were scared. The guards tried to cover my mouth, but I told them, "You cannot cover my mouth 24 hours a day. All I need is just one minute; that is long enough. What you are doing to Falun Gong practitioners here today will be well known everywhere in the world right away. All Chinese will get to know it, too. The more than 800 practitioners here will all be witnesses!" Such a righteous thought can truly suffocate the evildoers. With Master's protection, the guards dared not to cover my mouth.
In winter they locked me inside a small cell and forced me to sit on an ice-cold metal chair. The small cell was located on the 4th floor. On the 3rd floor were the offices where practitioners were being "transformed." The cafeteria was on the1st floor. They had thought that once I was locked up inside the small cell, they could stop me from shouting "Falun Dafa is good," since I was separated from other practitioners, but they were wrong! Instead, I shouted it over 100 times; and the more I shouted, the louder and sharper my voice became. Strangely enough, my voice could be heard far away. I sent forth-righteous thoughts to prevent the small cell wall from blocking my voice. One guard told me, "Your voice could be heard in the cafeteria."
I also sang the songs, "Be Saved," and "Coming for You." I recited Master's words daily and sent forth righteous thoughts every hour. When I was not handcuffed I practiced the exercises and held my hand erect to send forth righteous thoughts. They attempted to further persecute me. With Master's protection, they could do nothing.
The guards prevented me from relieving myself for a long period of time and forced me to eat food that mice had crawled over. I was only given some leftover pieces of corn bread. The guards raised the sound of the loudspeaker to the highest volume and also played metal-clashing sounds. In summer they tightly shut the door and windows. In addition, they covered my head with a "Head cover" intending to kill me. I was not afraid. I recited Master's lectures and sent forth-righteous thoughts. I also asked Master for help. Immediately, they took the "Head cover" off.
Since I was not permitted to relieve myself for a long time I started to have stomach pain. I shouted that I needed to use the toilet. The guards would not let me. I thought that I would transfer the pain onto this guard's body. When I shouted again that I needed to use the toilet, the guards quickly opened the door and let me out. I told the guards to sit down and wait for me; and the guard said, "I can't. My stomach hurts."
Nine months later, my blood pressure tested over 210 and I had a serious heart problem. All the tests turned out to be positive for a heart ailment. However, I did not feel anything at all.
One day another practitioner said, "You should ask Master to help you get out. We'll all help you!" With fellow practitioners' righteous thoughts and Master's help, I finally got out of the labor camp.
In recollection, in the past one year of walking on the path of Fa rectification, every step that I took was full of Master's efforts and endurance. Master immeasurably saves and protects me. Master also sent me many hints during that time. I was able to survive this difficult year. I am unable to pay back what Master gives me, but can only follow Master's lessons and do the three things well.
I should walk well on the path of Fa rectification. I hope that those practitioners who have not yet stepped forward and those who have made some mistakes won't be afraid and will quickly catch up with the process of Fa rectification! Master is waiting for us. Don't miss this once in a-thousand-year opportunity!
