(Clearwisdom.net) Writing a cultivation experience sharing paper is really a rare cultivation process. Due to various reasons and excuses, I could not calm down to think over my journey of cultivation and my cultivation state. This Fa conference made me sit down to look inside myself. Although it took me quite some time and energy, I feel it has been quite helpful for my improvement in understanding and cultivation.
I have been practicing cultivation for over ten years and experienced through ups and downs. But when I calmed down, what I thought about deeply was not those grand and amazing things, but just two words: one is "belief "and the other is "cultivation."
Belief
Over the past years, I have had so many shortcomings on the path of my cultivation. When thinking it over, the only thing that I feel satisfied with is my understanding of Dafa and my firm belief in Dafa. Some realizations obtained in the process of understanding Dafa make me think deeply.
I don't know if other people have had the same experience, but when I first read the Dafa books, I felt that, although Master talked about lots of things and phenomena from different angles in the books, no matter what he was talking about, it seems that he was only telling us one thing: to cultivate our xinxing and to be kind. For example, only by cultivating one's xinxing can one's illnesses be cured, only by cultivating one's xinxing can one increase gong and live a life like an immortal, and only by cultivating one's xinxing can one have supernormal abilities, have one's heavenly circuit opened, can one reach the state called "three flowers gathering above the head," etc. It is precisely this fundamental principal of teaching people to cultivate their xinxing and to be kind that breaks many of my notions as an ordinary person and made firm my determination to cultivate in Dafa. No matter what, a Dafa that teaches people to be kind is absolutely good.
At the same time, modern scientific and technological knowledge that I have acquired also convinced me that atheism is wrong and Dafa is true. My job is doing research in the microscopic fields of science, such as nano-technology. When I entered this field, I deeply felt how tiny and incapable human beings are, because their theories on microscopic fields are almost non-existent. It is not that there has been no research on them, but that we really are incapable. We all know Newton's law and Einstein's theory and so on. They describe the patterns of motion of matter in this universal space that we can see, and therefore we have cars, trains, aircrafts, spacecrafts, and so on. But human beings have never had a comprehensive theory to describe the patterns of motion of matter in the microscopic world. We all know that the macroscopic world is determined by the microscopic world. The microscopic world does not encompass just a tiny spot, but an entire realm where the microscopic particles can be touched. All objects in our macro-world are composed of microscopic particles in different permutations and combinations, and the so-called macro-world is only a portion that is immersed in the vast and boundless microscopic realm that is visible to human beings. At the microscopic realm, whoever can master the science in that realm can control microscopic particles in that realm. Think about it, what kind of state would it be? For example, microscopic particles' permutations and combinations have formed this table in the shape of a square. If we can manipulate microscopic particles, we can make them change the form of permutations and combinations, so that the [square] table turns into a round table, an oval table, or tables in other shapes. The same principle goes for a plant that can be turned into an animal instantly, an invisible things that can be conjured up in an instant, so Sun Wukong's 72 changes are not so difficult to understand and no longer a superstition. So microscopic determines macroscopic. The more microscopic, the higher its level. Moreover, the macro-world we are now living in is actually the most surface level and the most shallow place. Human science has made some achievements only in this simplest place, and we feel that we are remarkable. When truly touching the essential microscopic field, human beings become helpless and incapable.
If any life masters the science in the microscopic field, doesn't he also master the world we are living in? When human beings look at them, isn't it like looking at God or Buddha? There is no superstition here. But to reach that level of science and technology, we must go beyond everyday people's methods of study. Dafa reveals to us the best theory and method to reach that realm: Cultivate our "xinxing" and be kind, cultivate Dafa! There is no superstition. This also strengthens my confidence that Dafa is the universal truth.
To truly understand rationally that Dafa is the universal truth, our revered Master is guiding us on the most righteous path for any life. That is upgrading from understanding the Fa perceptually to rationally. Only then will you no longer judge Dafa according to superficial phenomena and perceptions. The goodness of Dafa can't be recognized through superficial perception but by believing that Dafa is good based on the principles. Any superficial manifestation--good or bad, feeling this way or that way, preferring this kind or that kind, and so on--are all constantly changing their superficial forms, which will no longer influence or interfere with our understanding and will no longer function. The universal truth is forever the truth of the universe.
Probably because I had a relatively good understanding from this aspect, when the CCP started persecuting, slandering, distorting, and attacking Dafa in 1999, my belief in Dafa was unaffected. I once collected and read slanderous articles from the state-controlled media. The more I read, the more I felt how heinous the evil is and the more I felt Dafa's beauty and revered Master's greatness. This process also proved a principle: when you are very righteous and strong-minded in a certain aspect, the evil's interference in this aspect is also small, because its interference will not work and there is thus no test at all. So over the past several years, when many things were confusing people's thoughts, such as misleading websites, people doing things that undermined the Fa because of demonic interference in their minds, speeches attacking Dafa, and so on, I did not know any of this until they had passed. At that time, I wondered why the news had reached me so belatedly!
Rationally understanding the Fa also makes it easier for me to understand some things at present. For example, the persecution still has not stopped, the time of Fa-rectifying the human world has not arrived, some practitioners encounter serious karma-elimination, some individual practitioners passed away, and other unsatisfactory things. On the one hand, all these are superficial phenomena. Dafa is the universal truth, the inner essence. On the other hand, I also feel revered Master's immense compassion: try all possible means to save all savable sentient beings! For some phenomena such as serious karma-elimination or practitioners' passing away or this or that kind of unpleasant thing, they were all individual practitioners' problems in cultivation. If we are truly able to meet the requirements of Dafa and our thoughts are very righteous and strong and there are no loopholes to be taken advantage of, then things will be fundamentally different. If we are truly able to be this way, no matter what arrangements were made in history before, "Master has the power to turn the tide!"
Cultivation
No matter how one strives to have firm belief, it will be in vain if one is unable to complete cultivation, because xinxing is a crucial factor that determines the height of one's level. "Cultivating the heart is most agonizing!" But no matter how difficult, one has to break through it.
In cultivation, I have had too many shortcomings and regrets.
It's not easy to get rid of attachments in cultivation. It is often the case that I recognize it but still cannot abandon it. There are also some attachments that I am unaware of, let alone able to get rid of. For example, while sharing with practitioners, I often talked about putting Dafa as the top priority, giving up the attachment to self and selfishness, and so on. Perhaps on the surface I take lightly some personal interests, and I also feel I can let go of attachments in this regard, so when talking with others about this, I feel relatively at ease, and it is also easier when I point this out for others. But one day my company suddenly had a big downsizing, and I was laid off. Suddenly I had no job, and I was anxious. While in this tribulation, many attachments emerged. Of course, this was a small episode in my life, and a superficial phenomenon, and I should have faced it as such. No matter what the circumstances, I should put Dafa and cultivation first. Without a job, I'd have more time to do Fa-validation work and study the Fa. Normally I would have no such opportunities. Certainly it does not mean I should forget about making a living; I should still spend some time looking for a job. But my real mindset at the time was one of anxiety. I had a sense of loss, was worried about life, and felt it was difficult to live. I did not do more Fa-validation work; instead, I spent most of my time worrying at home. I did not put much effort on studying the Fa and cultivating; instead, I read martial arts novels all day long to reduce stress. I read several novels at home. My mind was not actively thinking of how to do better in assisting Master in Fa-rectification and saving sentient beings but on how to find a job, make money, and so on. All this was the reality of my situation at that time. Many practitioners were unaware of this.
The more I was worried about finding a job, the less chance I had of finding one. The more I tried various means to make money, the more money I lost. This situation lasted for eight months. Based on my academic background, it should not have been that difficult for me to find a job, but I was trapped and was unable to be enlightened. From the perspective of getting by, my wife works, so we weren't going to starve. Actually this was a matter of cultivation. When encountering a problem, and being in tribulation, what I first thought of was my personal interests. I was worried for myself. Dafa and cultivation all retreated. Moreover, in the process, I even found some excuses for myself. For example, I thought only by first guaranteeing my personal life could I do Fa-validation work well. If I made big money, I could better support Dafa projects and so on. My selfishness was truly exposed, but while in the situation, I did not realize it at all, not to mention taking the initiative to abandon my attachments. Actually, when we are truly able let go of self and harmonize what we should do in ordinary life, I believe the result will be completely different.
At present, there are more and more Fa-validation projects, and more and more things that need to be handled. We are likely to ignore studying the Fa and our cultivation and even forget about cultivation when deeply involved in doing things. Coordinators, in particular, need to be stricter with themselves in cultivation so as to work well in such complicated situations. Otherwise, troubles will arise. When I coordinated a project, I needed to deal with many places and interact with many different people and things. One day a practitioner from a certain area wrote to other coordinators to report something about me. The letter was then passed on to me. I thought I did not have any big problems, so what could he have reported? I took a look at what was in the letter. When I started reading it, I was so shocked that my hair stood up on end. The letter described me as so bad, almost unpardonable. This incident was an unforgettable lesson. I thought hard about where the problem was.
The situation was this: The project in this certain area was not going smoothly and had been holding back progress in other areas. I thought I should try my best to help them get the thing done well, so I especially extended the deadline for them twice, allowing them over one month to get it done. But I felt things there still did not go smoothly, and troubles constantly came up. I began to get tired of it. But local practitioners there were really trying hard, so it seemed there was some hope. They requested several more days to get results. I extended the deadline for them once more, but I had almost reached the limit of my patience. Finally there was a breakthrough, and a practitioner excitedly made a phone call to tell me, but I missed the call and I did not listen to the recorded message in time, so I did not know what had happened. When they called me again, I happened to be on the other line, so I told them impatiently to talk to their local coordinator since I was busy. I was indeed really annoyed. Moreover, when I read the material they sent to me that night, a picture on the first page reflected a situation not in line with our requirements. I stopped reading right there and simply told them that they did not do well. Later I learned that the situation in the picture on the first page was only one situation, and there were situations that did conform to our requirements, but they hadn't taken pictures of them. Perhaps the whole process killed some of our local practitioners' enthusiasm, so they thought that I deliberately went against them and I didn't want them to do the thing well. My attitude was also very bad and the problem was serious, they needed to send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate the evil interfering with me, and so on. That complaint letter was probably produced under these circumstances.
But no matter what, this incident helped me realize the importance of cultivating the heart. No matter what we do, we are cultivating. We should remember at all times that we are cultivators and that everything is an opportunity for us to cultivate and improve and that nothing is a simple thing, it always involves cultivation. As coordinators, we should pay even more attention to every single word and act and maintain a higher requirement for ourselves. Objectively speaking, the complaint letter contained many exaggerations and some things were inconsistent with the facts. It even reflected the writer's personal cultivation state and xinxing. But I'm grateful for this letter and the writer, who made me examine myself in time and find my problem. In my coordination work since then, when I encounter some troublesome things, I always think of this incident and therefore can quickly hold myself to a high standard.
If one gets trapped in doing things but slacks off in studying the Fa and cultivating and has a bad state of mind, that will be reflected in our interactions with ordinary people. Recently, on several occasions in my company when discussing work with my colleagues, I could not help losing my temper. Later, a non-practitioner colleague told me that he thought practicing Falun Gong could change people to be kind. His words awakened me as if I had been hit on the head. Yes, I may have many things to coordinate, the scope of my work may be large, my responsibilities are many, and pressure is great, but all this is no excuse for me to not cultivate my xinxing and abandon my attachments. Otherwise, I'm doing things like an ordinary person. Only by doing well in cultivation can we do Dafa work truly well.
Cultivation on the last leg of the journey
Revered Master has clearly told us "The closer to the end, the more diligent you should be." This also indicates that at this final stage, there are still some instances of not being diligent. From time to time, I've heard some practitioners say that it seems that the busy practitioners have become even busier, while the practitioners who are not busy have become even less busy.
On the one hand, there are more and more Dafa projects, and more and more things need to be done, so some practitioners have a bigger workload, become busier, and get more and more trapped in doing things, so they slack off in cultivation and diligence.
On the other hand, while the current environment has become more and more relaxed and people have more activities in their lives, long-lasting Fa-rectification cultivation has not yet concluded, yet practitioners are likely to slack off. Some practitioners more and more indulge in everyday life and gradually move further away from the group cultivation environment. They do less and less Dafa work and become more and more relaxed with their cultivation.
No matter what, one thing is clear: the closer to the end, the higher requirement on cultivators and the greater the difficulties. If we do not strive forward diligently, I'm afraid we will have endless regrets at this final stage.
Fa-rectification has not concluded, so it is certain that there is a profound reason. But the universal Dafa cannot be subjected to the evil's persecution endlessly, and the time given to us will not last forever. It is our only opportunity in millions of years. Fellow practitioners, at this final stage, let's be more diligent!