(Clearwisdom.net) Many practitioners in our area were arrested early this year. After I was released from the forced labor camp, I had a subconscious fear of being arrested again, yet based on the Fa's principles, I recognized the old forces' arrangements. My status was still wavering between good and bad. In particular, I knew that I still had many attachments, and I had not let go of my attachments to fame, fortune and sentiment. I knew that any attachments could be an excuse for persecution by the old forces, and I was aware that I should not think that way, but I could not suppress those thoughts. I even thought about what I should do if the evildoers went to my home, and how I should arrange my things so that they could not find my Dafa books and truth clarification materials. I knew these thoughts were not righteous, but the interference was still serious. As a result, I became extremely depressed, but in my heart I understood that I could eradicate all of this interference by studying the Fa.
When I studied the Fa today, I read the section "The Things Your Teacher Gives His Students" in Zhuan Falun, which said,
"There's another kind of person. Other people told him before that he was possessed, and he too had a feeling that he was possessed. But after it's removed he still can't stop worrying. He always thinks that he still has that condition, he thinks it's still there. But that's an attachment, and it's called suspicion. As time goes on, he might invite it again if he's not careful enough. You have to get rid of the attachment. It doesn't exist at all now. For some of those people, we already took care of their problems in our earlier classes. I've already done those things--I've taken off all the possessing spirits.
After I read this section, I was suddenly enlightened. Teacher has said again and again that we do not acknowledge the arrangements of the old forces, or even acknowledge the old forces themselves. Then why should I have fear? I am Teacher's student. It is true that I have attachments, but I can eliminate them during cultivation. That should not be an excuse for the old forces to test me. Although I did some wrong things before, the old forces are not worthy of creating tribulations to test me. I just follow the path arranged by Teacher. I have nothing to do with the old forces. After I enlightened to this, I realized that my fear was due to my insufficient belief in Teacher and the Fa.
I also discovered that I had another attachment, namely, fear of attachments. Whenever I found my bad thoughts and attachments, I experienced fear. I feared that my attachments would be taken advantage of by the old forces and I would be persecuted. All in all, I did not genuinely realize what Dafa disciples during the Fa-rectification period are, and did not achieve the standard of a Dafa disciple during the Fa-rectification period.
I wrote about my attachments so that fellow practitioners who have similar attachments may learn from them.
October 14, 2007