(Clearwisdom.net) I started practicing Falun Gong in 1997. In the past two years, I started slackening off in the practice. I seldom studied the Fa, was scared of different things, became lazy, didn't exercise on a regular basis and was often upset by fame, personal gain and sentiments. This resulted in the evil's interference in the form of sickness karma in January 2007 and in January 2008. I want to share my experience with my fellow practitioners so they will not make the same mistakes that I did.
In January 2007 I had a severe case of the flu. I coughed so badly that I couldn't sleep and could taste blood when I breathed. It lasted six months and I became severely underweight. I realized the evil was trying to kill me. I tried to look inward to find the attachment the evil used as an excuse to persecute me. At the same time I studied the Fa to rectify my every thought. In my most difficult time my only thought was, "I am a Dafa practitioner, I walk the path Teacher arranged; my life and death is decided by Teacher." Blood had frequently rushed up to my throat, but all of a sudden a stream of power came down from my nose and pushed the blood back down. I had difficulty suppressing my coughs and once as I was about to burst into severe coughing, the words "mie" (eliminate) and "ding" (freeze) appeared next to me, and the urge to cough disappeared. Under Teacher's guidance and protection and with the help from fellow practitioners, I passed the test.
In January 2008, similar symptoms appeared as in 2007. I sweated heavily in my sleep, coughed blood, and had high fever. I looked inward and realized I was not diligent in the practice; I didn't always see myself as a practitioner. After I rectified my thoughts with the Fa and acted according to the requirement of the Fa, the symptoms disappeared.
Teacher said in Zhuan Falun, "What's meant by "not proper thoughts"? It's when somebody always has a hard time thinking of himself as a practitioner." (Lecture 6) Thinking back to the two severe illnesses, I realized I didn't think of myself as a practitioner at every moment. We live in ordinary society and need to take care of trivial tasks every day. However, it is important that we remember that we are practitioners. Teacher has arranged and balanced everything in our lives. Teacher asks us to assimilate to the principles of the universe and we must not be attached to the fame, personal gain and affections in this world. The old forces and rotten demons are constantly watching us. Once we stop treating ourselves as practitioners, the evil will not wait a second to destroy us.
We will not have fear once we treat ourselves as practitioners. Teacher leads us in doing the most righteous thing in the universe. Teacher doesn't acknowledge this persecution and neither do we. How can we be afraid of little things?
Why was I so lazy and relaxed in my study of the Fa and doing the exercises? It all comes down to the fundamental mistake: not thinking of myself as a practitioner at all times. We walk the path Teacher arranges and we must not confuse ourselves with non-practitioners and start to act as they do.
