(Clearwisdom.net)
Starting the Practice
I am 33 years old. Before practicing Falun Dafa, I was a fairly successful person compared to other people my age: I had a car, an apartment, and a decent income. In fact, many people my age and younger envied me. I felt pretty good about myself.
For several reasons, I broke up with my boyfriend in the beginning of 2006. I dated a few other men since, but nothing was fruitful. At the end of 2007, I got pregnant while dating my then boyfriend. Then, after a checkup, I learned that I had three tumors in my uterus.
When I told this to my manager, who is a very good person, she suggested that I practice Falun Dafa. She brought me the book Zhuan Falun the next day. This is how I became a Dafa disciple and began assisting Teacher in rectifying the Fa. As I studied the Fa more, I understood that I should follow Dafa's standards in everything and improve myself.
Passing the Hurdle of Sentimentality and Obtaining Benefits
During the Chinese New Year of 2008, two months after I started practicing Falun Gong, my boy friend disappeared from my life without giving me any reason. I couldn't find any information on him. When sharing with veteran practitioners, I realized that this was a test of qing. Though I just started practicing, I knew that I should follow the Fa's requirements. However, it was so hard to give up human attachments. I managed to appear that I had let go of my attachments. But when I got home, I felt miserable and couldn't fall asleep. Only when I listened to Teacher's Fa could I feel calm in my mind. During that period, I almost used Teacher's Fa lectures as a lullaby. Now thinking back it was a great disrespect to Teacher. Thus, during the whole holiday period, I stayed at home to read Zhuan Falun and listen to Teacher's Fa lectures. The reading made me calm and not so restless. After the holidays, I came out of the pain, went to work and cultivated happily.
I had been longing to have a wonderful family and marriage. As I studied the Fa, I realized that this is an attachment and it should be let go. So I started struggling about whether I should get married. I knew that when I didn't have a good solution for something, I should study the Fa. Through constant Fa study I understood that having a desire to get married is an attachment; forcing oneself not to marry is another attachment. Teacher has talked about letting it be. We should truly let go of the attachment - being unaffected is completely letting go. So I should let go of my attachment to marriage, believing that the path Teacher arranged for us is the cultivation path for us to take.
In April 2008, an older friend introduced me to a young medical doctor who had an 11-year-old daughter. After dating for six months, I realized that he had a lot of merits as a person. We got married in May 2009. With his daughter, we three people have a very good life. I always remember that I am a Dafa practitioner and hold myself to the standards of Truthfulness-Benevolence-Forbearance. I am very nice to his daughter and she likes me very much. Under my influence, she has come to like Dafa so much that she often says that she is one of Teacher's young disciples. My mother-in-law often praised me in front of her relatives and friends. My husband made great progress in his work. I knew these good things came from my cultivating Dafa. It's truly "one person practices (Dafa), the whole family benefits from it."
Overcoming Illness Karma
Starting in July 2008, I experienced my first karma-related illness. One day, I all of sudden felt great pain and even had blood in my urine. I remembered that I had acute cystitis a few times several years before. However, I knew that this was a good thing. Teacher was eliminating karma for me. Normally for an everyday person, if she felt pain when urinating, she would take medicine for it. As a Dafa practitioner, I needed to let go of my human heart. I should not keep thinking about it, nor should I treat it as a disease.
Although I knew what I should do as a practitioner, I was still nervous and could not let go of my attachment completely. I thought, "I should not take medicine, but let me drink more water." So I started to drink water cup by cup, though I drank only a little water before I went to the bathroom again and again, in the hope that the water would take the virus out of my body so that I could recover. However, no matter how much water I drank, I kept urinating blood. It even became more severe and the blood became thicker. I then started reading Zhuan Falun and even held my urine without going to the bathroom. When I woke up the next morning, I was happy. It seemed that reading the book was effective. I didn't go to the bathroom the whole night,so I thought that my symptom must have been reduced. However, when I went to the bathroom, there were still bloody clots in my urine and it was very painful.
That day, I needed to go to the capital city of our province. It's a 20 mile drive and there was no bathroom on the road. What should I do? Having no solution, I asked Teacher in my heart, "Teacher, please help me." At that moment, I saw some articles about the persecution against some practitioners on the Minghui website, the Chinese version of Clearwisdom. It mentioned that many practitioners would recite the Fa when being arrested. I then said to myself, "Let me recite the Fa, too." Thus, I took Zhuan Falun and started off. At every red light, I would read some lines from Lunyu. Then I would recite it in my heart when driving. Thus, it took a half hour to get to my destination. Not only did I not feel the urge to go to the bathroom, but I also completely memorized Lunyu. Then when I did go to the bathroom I didn't feel any pain when urinating. Nor was there any blood! I could not describe my happiness. Now I realize my attachment of zealotry came out at that moment. The miracle of Dafa just appeared in front of me. My heart was full of gratitude to Teacher. Besides feeling fortunate to get to study such a precious Dafa before Fa-rectification ends, I also felt sorry that I didn't know about Dafa earlier.
The above are some tiny parts of my cultivation. I cannot comprehend everything completely, so fellow practitioners, please point out my omissions. There are countless events, big and small, that occurred in my work and life. All of them were used by Teacher to improve my xinxing, and help me let go my attachments to reputation, self-interest, and emotion. After reading Teacher's " Teaching the Fa in Manhattan," I understood that my work environment was arranged by Teacher for my cultivation. In this environment, I must temper myself, improve my xinxing, and let go of all everyday attachments and postnatal notions.
November 5, 2009
