(Clearwisdom.net)

Greetings Master and fellow practitioners!

I am from Calgary, Canada. It has been more than one year since I immigrated to Canada from China. In China, I rarely had the opportunity to come in contact and work with other practitioners, so I looked forward to joining the group cultivation environment. I was very fortunate to participate in the ticket selling activities for the Shen Yun performances for the past two years, and deeply cherish the group cultivation environment. Working with fellow practitioners deepens my understanding of Dafa's boundless wisdom. Today, I mainly want to share about looking inward, breaking through notions and letting go of attachments when selling tickets for the Shen Yun performances. Please let me know if there is anything inappropriate.

Before I came to Canada, I taught at a university in China. This gave me the opportunity to read Falun Dafa books and at the same time clarify the truth to my students, colleagues and friends. Before I met with other Dafa practitioners, my understanding came from Dafa books; I thought that practitioners had very high inner character, were gentle and nice, had very sharp minds and were peaceful at heart. I had high expectations and respect for practitioners.

The second week after I arrived in Calgary, I couldn't wait to go to the practice site and join the group practice. However, the behavior, actions and words of practitioners upset me deeply. For example, there were those who didn't cultivate their speech, or whose tone lacked compassion. Some publicized themselves and stared at others. When encountering different opinions, everyone quoted the lectures quickly, and said how Master says this and that. Yet, this didn't resolve the problems.

At times, practitioners' speech, behavior and communication were very confusing. I was confused about these problems; we were all practitioners, so why had this situation arisen? Why was I exposed to this? These problems weren't that difficult. As long as everyone adhered to higher standards and took a step back, they could be resolved. Why can't people who cultivate Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance do this?

Given these problems, I tried to reconcile the opposing parties and make some suggestions. However, nothing I did produced a positive effect, and the situation continued. Many times, my intervention led to even more complex problems.

I was quite frustrated after experiencing these problems. I was upset for a long time, but I recalled Master's words about the Fa principles - when two people are in conflict, and a third person sees it, then all three should look inward and think about why they saw it. Therefore, I tried my best to look inward.

Wasn't it my confusion that was part of the problem?

When I saw that other practitioners were not on time and not keeping their word, I judged them, since I thought that I was doing well in these areas. When I saw that they did not keep their word, I thought that this was not right. When some practitioners did not cultivate their speech, were publicizing themselves and gossiping, I felt that their cultivation state was not good and that they had strong human attachments.

I judged them and was confused for a long time. Therefore, I spent a great deal of time reading Master's Fa. I read about how cultivators deal with conflicts, and conflicts among practitioners. I found that Master frequently addressed how practitioners should treat conflicts, including in the 2007 "Fa-Teaching Given to the Australian Practitioners." To summarize, Master said very clearly in the beginning, "look inside when encountering conflicts", "assimilate to Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance", "think of others first", "...be better than role models in everyday society", and "when a person reaches the Arhat level he's not fazed by anything he comes across. He's not the least bit concerned about any human things and he's always upbeat. It doesn't matter how much he loses out, he's upbeat and doesn't mind." That actually tells me that whatever I face in everyday society, I should treat everything lightly and not take it seriously. Then why did I feel so upset when seeing fellow practitioners not acting correctly? Why is this?

I discussed this issue with a fellow practitioner. I said, "How can a cultivator be like this? Wouldn't Master feel sad when he sees this?" The practitioner asked me, "Why?" I said, "It is like if you are a teacher. When the student began his studies at the university, you taught him some fundamental principles. These fundamental principles are the foundation for further studies. However, when it's close to graduation, you find that this student did not understand those principles. How sad the teacher feels." I added, "If I had students like that, I would really feel sad."

That practitioner said, "Master is around us every day. He can see everything. He will not feel sad."

This answer shocked and inspired me. It helped me to see my unhappiness through fellow practitioners from another perspective. I found that I was using human thoughts and emotions to guess what divine beings' thoughts were. People will feel upset, but not divine beings. They are compassionate.

In everyday society, I try to be a good teacher and hope that my students can meet my expectations and reach my standards. If a student's performance is not what I expect, I feel really upset. Come to think of it, Master lifted hundreds of thousands of people from hell, and takes on and suffers for his disciples' karma. He also has to arrange in detail their cultivation paths until their ultimate consummation, so that they will become highly respected divine beings. During this process, he will see disciples' numerous attachments, including what I thought to be bad behaviour for a practitioner. We know that Master, given his great wisdom and compassion, will not be moved by what he observes. Given this thought, if I am sad for students, it is because my ability didn't reach my goal. But Master will not feel sad, because Master uses the highest principles and standards of the universe to do things; the level and realm is different and can create different results.

Thinking about this level, I enlightened that I need to develop a broader mind and see things from different perspectives in order to understand what happened between cultivators. My heart and wisdom need to be widened and changed. This process of looking inward helped me to make good progress.

Searching within made me see my attachments. Actually, being upset is an attachment to oneself.

In the process of searching within, I discovered the reason why fellow practitioners upset me. It came from the "self" I had formed before cultivation, and especially those numerous notions that are connected with that "self" and developed over decades of living within ordinary society. Those notions formed after birth and enveloped my true self. They often made me think that they were from myself. I've become used to that, and have become unaccustomed to anything that differed from my personal notions. I subconsciously use my notions to distinguish right from wrong, correct from mistaken, virtue from vice, and good from bad, and even to judge things that happen in cultivation. Those notions include what a cultivator should look like, how a person with a good mind should handle things, what attitude and tone a person should have, what the best relationships among people should be like, what is considered proper, what is unreasonable, what is considered polite, what is considered rude, what is an appropriate way to handle things, what is an inappropriate way to handle things, and so on.

Those mentalities formed among ordinary people governed how I judged things that happened when cultivating among them - they were my measurement criteria. When things conformed to my way of thinking, I was happy. When things did not conform to my way of thinking, I felt unhappy. Consequently, I subconsciously became either happy or upset about things that happened in cultivation. However, those criteria are not necessarily Master's criteria and not necessarily in line with Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance, the highest criteria in this universe.

From another perspective, one's criteria for judging and measuring were formed among everyday people. It is indeed what needs to be constantly corrected and improved upon during one's cultivation. In the process of being corrected and improved, that self from the old universe will not voluntarily accept the change. When this is manifested in everyday life, one upholds and argues for the more familiar way of thinking that one is accustomed to. It is the attachment to that "self" formed in the old universe. This is probably the reason behind the unpleasant communications between fellow practitioners. It is also the root cause that made me upset when faced with these problems.

Therefore, in the process of cultivation, one's self will be constantly rectified, reshaped, and purified from the root. This happens when one is going through a xinxing test, assimilating to the characteristics of the universe, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance, among a complex group of people, and forging oneself among conflicts and friction. This is a process of constantly letting go of the previous self and at the same time, a process of genuinely returning to one's original self.

Thus, for practitioners whose cultivation occurs in everyday society, the conflicts between each other manifest during cultivation, and the experience to overcome one's self might well be the soul-stirring process of reorganizing universes in other dimensions.

All of these thoughts are inference and guess work. In fact, being within the cultivation process, I do not know what cultivation really looks like, what a cultivator should really look like and what status manifested during cultivation process originally looks like. So those unpleasant feelings caused by seeing things among some practitioners are merely the result of one's mentalities formed after birth.

Have faith in Master and the Fa. Isn't it true that these phenomena shown among cultivators are things in Dafa that we need to understand and respect with a positive attitude? Perhaps it is a normal phenomenon that Dafa manifests in a special time and space, and that I need to understand it actively and positively. It is not Dafa that has any problems, and it is not necessarily either that a cultivator really does not meet the criteria. It is my perspective self-formed after birth that needs to be reshaped and uplifted. This process is the reason that one needs to look inward during cultivation.

When I thought about this, I felt that my view expanded. Looking inward is indeed to constantly change one's perspective, to understand some things with broader vision and wisdom of higher levels, to untie the knots in one's heart, and consequently, to settle those love-hate relationships formed through past reincarnations with benevolent solutions. Looking inward can generate broader understanding and tolerance toward others.

Master said that everything encountered in one's cultivation is a good thing. The conflicts encountered in our cultivation, especially things among fellow practitioners that might shock our hearts, are all precious chances for us to improve, and valuable opportunities to expand our hearts. When we pass that test, Dafa will manifest its infinite beauty and broader space at a higher level. Fellow practitioners who upset you are actually people we should thank during our cultivation process. Therefore, no matter how other practitioners do things, they are helping us to understand higher principles from a certain perspective. Once we understand those principles, we improve, and space at this level does not constrain us any longer.

When I thought about this, I felt that heaven was clear, my body was transparent, the sunshine was especially clear, the air was filled with a pleasant scent, and passersby kept on smiling at me. After that moment, when I looked at fellow practitioners again, I found that every one of them actually looked very kind. My heart was full of gratefulness to Master.

According to the principles for everyday people, to cure an illness, one usually needs to find out the underlying cause and then prescribe medicine according to the disease. When a diagnosis is wrong, the method to solve the problem can have only the opposite effect.

Master tells cultivators to look inward when encountering conflicts instead of searching for others' weaknesses, and not to outwardly pursue. This is a method to actively search for a solution to a problem.

When I looked inward, I discovered that my way of thinking was the reason I saw the conflicts among other practitioners, and that I needed to expand the capacity of my heart. I started to consciously watch myself and examine my way of thinking when I saw those things that upset me, and I actively suppressed those thoughts. At the same time, I tried to put myself in the fellow practitioner's shoes, to understand why he said or did things from his perspective, to understand the "state of immense tolerance, of mercy toward all beings, and of being able to understand everything with kindness" ("Teaching the Fa at the 2002 Fa Conference in Boston as told by Master.

Frequently, the part of me that has not cultivated well does not listen to me, and I cannot completely stop finding any fault in all situations as well. I often experience the powerful and immediate effect when I do things according to Dafa's requirements.

Once, during a conversation with a fellow practitioner, she suddenly became excited and spoke with angry words. My first reaction was not to think about what she did wrong. Instead, I thought that she was old and held a lot of anger, and that her feelings would be affected for the whole day. I thought that I must also have something wrong in me, and I should examine myself as well. I sincerely apologized to her immediately, and hoped she would stop being angry. At that moment, she instantly recovered from the excitement and sincerely apologized to me. I was happy that both of us passed the test quickly.

Looking inward for a different perspective to consider problems allows me to face problems encountered during cultivation with a more peaceful mind. I understand in more depth why Master emphasizes looking inward. It is a supernatural treasure that actively solves the problem, and a Fa implement with extremely rich meaning that Master gave us. Enormous power will manifest in the most effective method to settle right and wrong, kindness and hatred.

The book, "A Journey to the West" tells through vivid stories that one must pass eighty-one tribulations to understand the true scriptures. It revealed that as a cultivator, one has to be ready at any time to suffer and pass tests. Master told us that a cultivator must be able to "bear hardships upon hardships" (Zhuan Falun) and remain unmoved when seeing self interests clearly damaged. The process of searching within is a process of daring to take on hardships and also to abandon the familiar self that is formed among everyday people. The Fa tells us "No loss, no gain" (Zhuan Falun). Only by abandoning the self that was formed as an everyday person, can one obtain a noble self and a completely new self that is in line with the criteria of the new universe. Look inward first for any event, abandon the self formed after birth, abandon the attachment to one's self, and Master will show us the infinite wisdom and beauty in the Fa.

The above are some of my recent understandings about looking inward. Please kindly point out anything inappropriate.

Thank you, great Master!

Thank you, my cultivation group that gives me precious cultivation opportunities!