(Clearwisdom.net) Greetings, Master! Greetings, Fellow Practitioners!
I'm a veteran practitioner who obtained the Fa in 1996. Prior to that I was a gloomy and introverted person who liked to listen to sad music and think about sad stories. I was a very unhappy girl. After obtaining the Fa, my world was totally changed.
The insomnia and fatigue that I had suffered from every day disappeared. Sunlight entered my world and appeared on my face. I smiled from the bottom of my heart. My boss said to me, "Xiao Nie, what happened to you recently? You are smiling every day."
At the time I didn't understand and simply thought cultivating Dafa was great. There finally seemed to be a purpose for my life. Dafa was like a bright light and illuminated my entire being. Looking back at ten-plus years of cultivation, through various ups and downs, Master's compassion has protected me, my family, and practitioners, through difficulty after difficulty, through tests of life and death.
I know that to save us, Master resolved endless karma for us and sentient beings, with immense effort.
Master said,
"But during the process of cultivating successfully, it takes so much wisdom and so much thinking and care to reconcile every single being that's in the groups of beings in the countless microcosms and macrocosms! It's just like with saving you: their issues have to be resolved just the same. What does 'Buddha's infinite grace' mean? Think about it, when a person is being saved, how much will the Buddha who saves him have to give? For all those beings in the infinite microcosms who correspond to the person, he has to--just like what's done during your cultivation process--adjust their bodies well at the beginning, allow them to obtain the Fa, make them able to handle it, and deal with their karma. What a huge, involved task that is! Could that possibly be achieved without compassion? So how could everyday people understand the phrase 'Buddha's infinite grace'?" ("Teaching and Explaining the Fa at the Metropolitan New York Fa Conference" 2003)
Master does not seek anything from us, but I, who benefited so much from Dafa, didn't even want to look back and review my experience, due to fear and my attachment to comfort. Practitioners' repeated reminders compelled me to write. As the scenes from my cultivation flashed through my mind, I finally realized that I have not been worthy of Master's great compassion. As tears welled up in my eyes, I told myself that I must share my experiences during this Fa Conference.
My husband and I arrived in the US in late 2008, and my husband started working in marketing at the Epoch Times. To support him so that he could concentrate on Dafa projects, I started a day-care at home to make enough for our daily expenses. Since I have to work from Monday through Friday, the weekends became my most precious time. I told myself that these times belong to Dafa. Every weekend I hoped that practitioners would give me a project to work on. At first I waited, but later on I looked for things to do, such as type, prepare banners, sell Shen Yun tickets, and other Fa work.
Before the 2009 Shen Yun performances I called the coordinator every weekend asking what I could do. At the time I pretty much always dressed like a celestial maiden in a shopping mall. Since I don't speak English, I sent righteous thoughts and tried to smile kindly at everyone. I wanted to use the excellence and kindness of Dafa practitioner to stop the sentient beings who were walking by. Though I'm already 40 years old I firmly believed that practitioners have the divine presence given by Dafa. I think this is most likely the true meaning of the phrase "divine presence."
I was once in a mall in a northwestern Chicago suburb, dressed like a Qing Dynasty lady. The beautiful dress attracted many people. Some wanted to have their photo taken with me, and some came to praise the dress. Two ladies complimented on the beautiful dress and wanted to talk with me. Even though I could not communicate with them, they still didn't leave. I didn't know what to say, so I asked an English-speaking practitioner to introduce them to Shen Yun. The listened for a long time and then left. Soon afterward they hurried back. The taller lady told me excitedly what they saw. When they came into the mall, they saw many butterflies flying around in the mall. Following the butterflies, they saw me from far away and thought that I looked like a large butterfly. This drew them to the Shen Yun booth. When they got closer, they saw that the Qing Dynasty dress had many beautiful butterflies sewn into it. I didn't even notice this detail until they mentioned it to me. They thought this was magical. The taller lady said, "You must be a divine messenger." This small, magical incident really shocked me. Just like practitioners have said--while we are doing visible things, everything is really done by Master.
Righteous beings in other dimensions also participate. They will lead predestined people to us. Don't look down on a piece of paper, a pen, even a single symbol. When our thoughts are righteous, they will participate in rectifying the Fa. Now I feel that I better understand what Master said, "... one is as good as ten; ten is as good a hundred."
Other than supporting Shen Yun, I spend most of my Saturdays in Chinatown clarifying the truth. During the little over one year I devoted to clarifying the truth I experienced happiness, but also disappointments. The process gradually made me more mature.
Master said,
"Today I might as well tell everyone clearly: The Fa-spreading method we've adopted all along is that you do the exercises outdoors. Another one is to have our Dafa books for sale in public bookstores. My Law Bodies will direct people with a predestined relationship to buy the book, and as soon as they read it they will come and learn. Also, we're doing the exercises outdoors, so the Law Bodies will arrange for them to find the practice sites and obtain the Fa. Through a strange combination of circumstances they will be led over here to do the exercises, or they will find our students. That's how we've arranged it." ("Teaching the Fa at the Conference in Switzerland," 1998, Geneva)
Master's plans are very orderly. Disciples should assist Master in rectifying the Fa, and create opportunities for sentient beings to establish a relationship with Dafa.
While clarifying the truth in Chinatown I have met many such people with predestined relationships. Many people who have come to our booth learned and came to understand the truth. Westerners have relatively few obstacles, as Master told us. When we tell them the truth about Dafa, their righteous thoughts are activated. Some want to sign the petition, some want to donate money, some ask for information about Dafa and want to practice, some even ask us to teach them the exercises on the spot. This shows the righteous and kind thoughts of sentient beings who choose a correct position for their future and also plant an opportunity for them to obtain the Fa in the future. On one occasion when practitioners were doing a group meditation, an American lady about 60 years old walked right into the middle of the group and sat down on the ground to do the meditation. At first I thought this might be an American practitioner who had come to spread the Fa. She told us later that as she was walking by, she felt a strong energy field. Her hip and back previously hurt, but after meditating she felt comfortable and pain-free, and she thought this was amazing. She then asked a practitioner about our website and related information. Actually, Master has carefully arranged every seemingly accidental opportunity.
Many Chinese people initially have set opinions about us, and very few even accepted our materials. Slowly, people's attitudes have changed. When practitioners cooperate well and have pure hearts, more people will accept the information and seem friendlier. Now people withdraw from the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its affiliated organizations every day at our Chinatown site, ranging from a few to 20 and 30 per day. Some said they had heard the facts before and finally decided to quit.
One female college student became furious after learning of the evil deeds of the CCP, and quit the CCP organizations on the spot as soon as she heard the facts. She asked that we also help her family members quit the CCP and assured us that they were definitely willing to do so. She got a phone call from her sister and said, "I'm doing something very important right now!" We smiled when we heard that. She really was doing something very important. Another time, we met an older gentleman who did not speak Mandarin, so we basically could not communicate. But he didn't leave. I knew his true nature was waiting to hear the truth. But how could I communicate with him? Suddenly I realized that I could write things down for him, so I took out a notebook and wrote, "Quitting the CCP brings safety and wellbeing, and divine blessings." He nodded his head. Then, I wrote, "Quitting means resigning from all the CCP organizations. The CCP did a lot of bad things, the heavens will eliminate it." After figuring out that he had once worn the red scarf, I helped him select an alias, and he quit the CCP organizations. I also wrote that he should remember, "Falun Dafa is good, Zhen-Shan-Ren is good." He again nodded his head, repeatedly thanked me, and left with a smile on his face.
I feel that all sentient beings really came to establish a relationship with Dafa, so our every effort represents a chance that they will be saved. Even if they don't quit the Party right away, I sincerely hope they will get in touch with other practitioners, because we are the only hope of salvation for the sentient beings, as Master teaches us.
I have met all kinds of people during the process of clarifying the truth, including those who admire us, those who empathize with us, and those who mock, ridicule, and curse us. I can usually maintain my xinxing, because I know that their knowing sides will definitely thank me and thank Dafa.
What I spoke about initially was quite casual, leading to unsatisfactory results. I also hoped to meet people who were honest and didn't talk a lot. When I met knowledgeable people that liked to discuss history, I got uneasy. One man from northeastern China listened to me carefully. He said that truth becomes clearer the more it is discussed, "If you want me to believe you, then you have to convince me." When I heard him say he wanted to debate, my first reaction was to look for another practitioner, but the other practitioner was nowhere to be found, so I forced myself to speak. I also remembered practitioners asking Master for help, so I asked Master to give me wisdom. I calmed down and told myself that I could definitely speak well. While I wasn't able to convince that man to quit the CCP, I think the conversation definitely laid the foundation for him to be saved in the future.
One Saturday it started to rain in the morning. I thought it wouldn't be possible to clarify the truth that day, so I made other arrangements and didn't treat this with righteous thoughts, but passively accepted the situation. When the sky cleared at noon I thought, "Should I still go? What if no one is there? My husband is not at home, so how can I carry the display board by myself? Maybe I shouldn't go..." My mind was uneasy and restless, and I vacillated between righteous thoughts and human attachments. I realized that this was laziness and my attachment to comfort. If I didn't go ahead, how many sentient beings would miss this opportunity to be saved? How big of a crime would that be? Without another thought, I grabbed my bag and went.
While on the way I figured out how to move the materials and display board to the truth clarification site. With everything prepared, I looked at people walking by and knew I had made the right decision. I then contacted fellow practitioners but was not very successful. I thought, "Even if no one comes, I still have to clarify the truth. I'm here to clear out the evil." From experience I knew more that Americans would be present in the afternoon, so I thought, "Let people look at the display board."
At first only a few people arrived. They looked at the display board, took information, and left. When there was no one, I sent righteous thoughts to clean the environment, clean the evil interference in other dimensions, and ask Master for help and to arrange for other practitioners to come and help. After about 40 minutes, I saw a practitioner in the distance. I didn't remember ever seeing this practitioner clarifying the truth at the Chinatown site, but today she had brought her elementary school-age son with her. Wasn't this all planned by Master? I was very happy. This practitioner's English was very good. Soon after she arrived, more and more people looked at the display board and asked questions. Four people even learned the exercises. While teaching the exercises, even her son helped. While I taught the exercises, the young practitioner helped to translate. The three of us cooperated, doing our best. Later on another family of practitioners arrived. Even more people came to hear the truth after that. For a while, each one of us spoke with someone--Westerners and Chinese. When I thought of Master's words, that all sentient beings came for the Fa, I got very emotional. If we had not come out to clarify the truth that day, would we not have disturbed Master's plans for saving sentient beings? Would that not have delayed the Fa rectification process? Cultivation is very serious, as Master has taught us. From the looks of it I was doing a Dafa project, but I asked myself, did I fulfill my duty? I know I'm still a long way from the standard Master requires.
For practitioners who clarify the truth outdoors, winter is the most difficult time. Chicago is known as the Windy City. The wind can scatter the displays board and tear a hole in our banners. During the harshest weather it is very cold, and no matter how much clothing you wear, sometimes the frosty air makes even my mouth numb. My fear of suffering and my desire for comfort emerged, and I started to worry. While I hoped to be in a warm place, I thought that since Master planned for me to be here, then I should keep it up, no matter the suffering. Wasn't this a good opportunity for me to cultivate tolerance and improve myself? Gradually I adapted to the cold weather. Sometimes when I stood in the snow, watching snowflakes, I felt that what I was doing was holy and glorious. On a snowy day a couple came to our display board and said, "We see you here every week, even in so much snow." Their comment meant, "What makes you persist?" It is the responsibility and mission we shoulder. When we truly display the compassion and persistence of Dafa disciples, not only people but even gods will admire what we do.
Our truth clarification group became quite negligent this past summer. I think it was because we studied the Fa together infrequently. We went out later and later each day. Sometimes people looked at the display board before it was properly set up. It made me feel guilty, that I had let people down because I couldn't be truly diligent. This gave the old forces reasons to interfere. Wherever we went, people from the church nearby would ask the police to drive us away. Their reasons ranged from our not meeting regulations to them having events. The police told us to move to a different plaza. I didn't want to go there and looked for excuses such as "there are so few people," or "it is not very effective to clarify the truth there." The real reason was that the location was in direct sun, and there was no shade. The fear of suffering was not completely removed during the winter, so a similar problem happened in the summer.
What happened later seems like an indication that it might have been Master who was chasing us away. Since summer is the travel season, busload after busload of tourist groups from China came to Chinatown Square to eat. Master wanted us to save these people! We didn't search within following this realization. What emerged were a competitive mentality and complaints. We went to the police department and the church to clarify the truth to them, but the situation did not improve. We didn't have a place to clarify the truth for several Saturdays. I felt bad. Discussing this with practitioners made us realize that it was our negligence and attachment to comfort, and our failure to treat seriously the responsibility Master had given us that led to this interference. We should correct all this and walk the path that Master planned.
We decided to go there very early in the morning. We went to Chinatown Square if there were activities at the church. After correcting our mindset, we found that the problem was fixed right away. The church no longer called the police, and they seemed not to have any more events. Because we changed, the surrounding environment also changed.
Master said,
"....what worries me most is not the hardships or ordeals you face, which you know to be plenty hard. They are not the hardest thing; after all, however trying hardship may be, it's over after you get through it, and at that point things are clear to you. Rather, to quietly cultivate in bleak loneliness, unable to see hope, is the hardest of all. Doing any form of cultivation entails undergoing a trial such as this and a path with such features. Only if one can persevere and continually forge ahead does it amount to true diligence. It's easy to talk about, but putting it into action is tremendously difficult. That is why it's said that always cultivating as if you were just starting will surely result in achieving your ultimate rank." ("Fa Teaching at the 2009 Greater New York International Fa Conference")
The fact that our Chinatown truth clarification group has been able to follow Master's Fa rectification to this day is the result of everyone's collective cooperation. Some of us only have one day or half a day free each week, but we still chose to come and clarify the truth every week, giving up our only break. Some of us are not financially well off but still quietly buy truth clarification materials. When I found this out, I asked one particular practitioner, "Why not ask the Dafa Association for money?" She said, "That money is donated by practitioners. Shen Yun needs to perform. All Dafa efforts need money. Besides, one cherishes things more when one buys something with one's own money." Will I be able to reach such a selfless state? Also, the two mainland practitioners who recently joined our group displayed their pure and righteous hearts while saving sentient beings and really showed me my gaps. I think this is what xinxing level means.
Thank you, Master, for planning this cultivation environment for me in which I not only am able to cultivate myself but also to honor my own prehistoric vow to complete the mission of assisting Master in Fa rectification
Thank you, Master. Thank you, fellow practitioners!
