(Clearwisdom.net) Since I began practicing Falun Gong in 1998, with Master’s merciful protection, I have overcome many tribulations on my cultivation path. Master has repeatedly enlightened me in my dreams to quickly catch up when I was stalled in cultivation and to completely negate the old forces during hardships. Master also has rewarded me with flowers when I have done well.
1. Rectifying Myself with Fa Study
Because of my confusion and attachment to fear, I put away Dafa books and stopped practicing cultivation after the persecution started on July 20, 1999. However, Dafa was always in my heart and Master repeatedly enlightened me in my dreams to quickly get on the Fa boat. I thus restarted cultivation in 2001. At that time, the local coordinator had given up practicing cultivation under pressure and moved out of town. The practitioner who had been in charge of Dafa information materials was a prisoner in a forced labor camp. We did not know where we could get Master’s new lectures. Only some handwritten copies and false scriptures were being circulated.
Fortunately, I later met a recent college graduate and fellow practitioner who knew how to operate computers. He gave us all of Master’s lectures released after 1999. He not only contributed to our improvement in cultivation, but also provided us techniques to establish our collection of informational materials at home.
In the spring of 2002, I learned how to log onto the Minghui website (Chinese version of Clearwisdom). On the site, I saw a picture showing Master quietly watching the world from amidst the mountains. I felt Master’s compassion and was moved to tears. I was determined in my heart to steadfastly practice cultivation so that I could reach Consummation and finally follow Master home.
I read experience sharing articles on the Minghui website and was deeply touched by fellow practitioners’ selflessness. During that period, I substantially improved in my cultivation and also achieved good things at work. Several of my published papers won awards. Many of my students received numerous awards in contests, and I also received an Excellent Supervision Award. In the past, I had tried very hard to earn those awards but to no avail. Surprisingly, I got them after I became a Dafa practitioner and removed my attachment to fame.
When Master’s article “Touring North America to Teach the Fa” was posted, I did not have a computer and my fellow practitioner’s copy machine was broken. So that fellow practitioners could read the article quickly, I hand-copied the article after school hours. It only took me two days to finish it without any mistakes. I felt very good afterward. I later copied several articles from “Essentials for Further Advancement II” for our local practitioners.
A fellow practitioner later showed us a DVD titled “The facts of the staged Tiananmen self-immolation” and a CD about overseas practitioners' validating the Fa. I saw overseas practitioners protesting in front of the Chinese Embassies and Consulates and distributing truth-clarification materials without being disrupted. I was touched by their actions and felt myself to be far behind. I was inspired and determined to distribute truth-clarification materials. A fellow practitioner provided me with materials by way of his newly purchased computer and copy machine.
Because I focused too much on distributing materials, I studied the Fa less and did not concentrate when I did. I also wasn't firm when sending forth righteous thoughts. As a result, I was taken advantage of by the evil.
After I was given up by another practitioner who had been arrested earlier, I was also arrested and taken to a hotel from work. The police questioned me about my source of Dafa information materials for three days. I was then illegally sentenced because of my failure to completely negate the old forces and adequately deal with tribulations.
I unwillingly signed the three statements because I feared being persecuted and because of my sentimental attachments to my family. My act has left a permanent stain on my cultivation path. I felt that I had shamed Master and was not worthy of his merciful salvation. I realized after a period of suffering that I had to return to cultivation. I started memorizing “On Buddha Law” in Zhuan Falun, Hong Yin, and some of Master’ scriptures everyday. I looked inward and found clues to my shortcomings in cultivation in my tribulations. I didn’t study the Fa diligently. I didn't understand Master’s words rationally. I didn’t steadfastly believe in Master and the Fa. I also had attachments to Consummation, selfishness, a desire to show off, zealotry, and competition with others.
After memorizing the Fa, I started to understand why Master mentions that “ordinary people have to fundamentally change their way of thinking,” “change their longstanding way of thinking” and “changing its rigid way of thinking” (“On Buddha Law,” Zhuan Falun). The concepts mankind formed over thousands of years of human progress have become natural and need to be removed during cultivation. This can be done by diligent Fa study. This is one reason that Master has repeatedly emphasized the importance of studying the Fa more.
I later clarified the truth to the guards and persuaded them to quit the CCP and its affiliated organizations. By the time I was released from jail, over ten people had agreed to withdraw from the CCP. Some even asked me to give them hand-written poems from Hong Yin.
2. Cultivating Firmly
-Establishing a Small Material Information Center
I couldn’t find a job after being released from jail in 2008. When my husband brought an obsolete computer home from his workplace, I had a notion to set up a Dafa information site, but the idea was then put on hold for lack of money. However, I knew that my life now would be about cultivation. To catch up with the progress of Fa-rectification, I studied the Fa diligently and sent forth righteous thoughts to cleanse my own dimension and eliminate wicked factors imposed on me. Meanwhile, practitioners gave me some of Master’s new lectures. One of them was the article “Dissolving the Party Culture.” This article taught me how the Party culture has damaged us as human beings. I realized that this culture had been instilled in me since childhood and that I had often used its language unintentionally before I eradicated my own factors of the bad Party culture. I felt it was urgent to clarify the truth and distribute truth materials to sentient beings.
My truth clarification ran into some obstacles due to sentient beings' and my family's fear of persecution. After reading Master’s lecture about the efficiency of writing messages on paper currency, I wrote short messages on paper money. I also hung truth-clarification banners at night.
After learning about distributing Shen Yun performance DVDs to sentient beings, I copied the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party and other videos from CCTV’s “Focal Point” onto DVD for distribution. During this period, I had a major breakthrough in helping my husband return to his cultivation path.
With my husband’s agreement and help from fellow practitioners, I finally set up a materials production center at my home in the spring of 2009. Since then, I have made information materials, self-adhesive posters, and others items for distribution. I even produced one-page calendars in 2009. I also made copies of the 2010 Shen Yun performance DVD after it became available. Its exquisite charm was in high demand and helped save sentient beings.
My materials production center now plays a significant role in providing local practitioners with materials. I also reprint Master’s new lectures and even the Nine Commentaries. I sincerely appreciate fellow practitioners for their selfless help. I have been very busy, but my life has been fulfilling. Learning from my previous lesson, I always study the Fa regardless of how busy I am.
-Cultivating Myself by Producing Materials
Producing materials also helps improve xinxing. I didn’t realize the difficulties in producing materials until I had to do it by myself. As demand for materials grew, I started complaining about not getting help from other practitioners--especially when I was too busy to cook or eat. Whenever I complained, I was amazed that there would always be a minor problem with the machine to awaken me.
On one occasion, when one fellow practitioner visited me and offered some financial help, I could not help but complain about the manpower shortage. My copy machine suddenly jammed, and the problem occurred repeatedly. I failed to see the connection, still thinking that it was just a copy machine problem. I got worried and upset because the practitioner who knew computers was unable to come over and fix the problem for many days. The more anxious I became, the more resentful I grew.
The machine problem was still unsolved until I read an article on the Minghui website, mentioning that a machine problem as actually a xinxing problem, and the solution is to fix one's xinxing first. Enlightened by this article, I started looking inward and found that I had many human attachments, such as depending on others, zealotry, complaining about others, and impatience.
I admitted my faults to Master and sent forth righteous thoughts to cleanse my own dimension. The machine then worked fine. I informed the fellow practitioner not to come the following day.
From this lesson, I have learned to seize any bad notion and eliminate it as soon as it arises. I now always say, “Thank you! I appreciate your hard work.” to my computer and copy machine every time after finishing my work. Gradually, everything began to work smoothly.
-Cultivating Myself by Distributing Materials
I have gained many experiences in distributing materials over the past few years. I occasionally would share my experiences with fellow practitioners, and unintentionally I would feel my attachment of zealotry. I thought I had almost removed my attachment to fear until one event occurred.
One day, I went to the market with another practitioner to distribute materials. It was about 10 a.m. People were rushing home after shopping when we started to distribute the materials. The other practitioner immediately began to hand out materials without any fear, even though there were so many people.
When I was hesitant to start, she asked me to send forth righteous thoughts while she distributed the materials. I realized my cultivation level was well below hers. I felt ashamed and immediately adjusted my own mind. I calmed down and sent forth righteous thoughts for her at a distance. Everything went smoothly afterward. Nobody refused to accept a brochure and some people even asked for more. The demand for the materials was so high that we regretted not bringing enough copies.
On the way home, we shared our experiences. We both agreed that the distribution went smoothly because our minds were righteous and Master protected us. This is reflected in something Master said in “Eliminate Your Last Attachment(s)” in Essentials for Further Advancement II): “If you are not afraid, the factor that would make you afraid will cease to exist.”
3. Upgrading My Xinxing by Helping Fellow Practitioners
-Establishing a Group Fa Study
When I was released from jail in 2008, I observed several problems in our area. Because of fear of being persecuted, many practitioners had stopped cultivation. Some privately practiced at home. They did not greet each other on the street. I was told that when a practitioner was illegally arrested, other practitioners did nothing but send forth righteous thoughts at home. Sad to say, they did not realize that Dafa disciples are not individuals, but a united whole.
I felt sad about the egotism and decided to change the situation. I met one practitioner and several newcomers at her house. After numerous discussions, we formed a Fa study group and studied twice a week at her house. As more and more new practitioners eagerly joined the Fa study, we expanded the number of the study groups at different locations. As a result, the practitioners’ understanding of Fa principles has improved substantially.
-Helping Former Practitioners Return to Cultivation
Besides fear of persecution, many practitioners stopped cultivating for various reasons. To help former practitioners return to the cultivation path, we reached out to them as much as possible. I found that I also benefited from this process. For example, I no longer criticized the weaknesses of my husband and daughter or judged them according to the Fa principles. From their words and actions, I learned to further look inward. I also learned to look inward from fellow practitioners’ actions and cultivate away many of my human concepts and habits. Helping fellow practitioners really improves my cultivation, as it reminds me of the need to be more diligent at every moment.
Although I have been progressively cultivating myself to assist Master in Fa rectification, I still have many human attachments to be eliminated. As a Fa-rectification-period Dafa disciple, I am sure I will do better in cultivation.
Because of my limited level, please kindly correct anything inappropriate.
Category: Improving Oneself
