(Clearwisdom.net) Although I am an intellectual and can write professional articles, I am not good at writing personal articles, so I never dared write for Clearwisdom. Before I began cultivating in Falun Dafa, the worst attachment I had was arguing. I did it all day long, fighting hard with people about everything. After I began cultivating, I corrected my deficiencies, but I still liked to blame others whenever I saw anything improper. Especially since I am a college professor, I harshly criticized students whenever I saw their problems. Although I knew very well that this is what Teacher meant when he said to suppress the bad, I was not able to correct myself. Teacher wanted us to remind people of their wrongdoings with good will and a nice attitude, but I was unable to do that. Although I sincerely regretted it afterward, and often berated myself, I was unable to change the habit.
In my recent study of Teachers' lectures, I often saw the word "laugh," as in "Teacher laughs" or "Audience laughs."At first I was a bit curious, wondering why Teacher would leave the word "laugh" in the edited transcript of lectures. Later, when I watched the video recording of "Fa Teaching Given to the Australian Practitioners," I suddenly realized that Teacher's smile was also teaching us the Fa. When does Teacher smile? Teacher smiles when a disciple does something well. Teacher will also smile, sometimes with tears in his eyes, if a practitioner doesn't do well or does something wrong. I saw no anger or blame in his eyes. There was only benevolence. I finally understand Teacher's "smile." Teacher is telling us that, in dealing with other people's mistakes or deficiencies, we should not blame or criticize them harshly. Rather, we should kindly and benevolently point out their mistakes and resolve all issues with smiles and goodwill. Realizing this, I gradually learned how to "smile." Now, with a smile, I can compassionately discuss things with students when I find them not working hard or playing at Internet bars or arcades.
On the Clearwisdom and Zhenjian websites, I saw a few classic examples that touched me greatly:
Fa Study
One practitioner reads three chapters of Zhuan Falun each day and has been doing it for years. As a result, she does the three things very well. Since I have a rather heavy workload, I set my standard at one chapter per day. But whenever I was busy, I stole the time from Fa study. With Fa not studied well, other things could not be done well. Basically, I become deficient in my righteous thoughts--not putting the three things as the main priority. I think too much about my career, my work, and my rest, and I seek comfort and stability. One fellow practitioner I know does a lot of work in Dafa coordination as well as everyday people's work. Sleeping only about three hours per day, she is still always very energetic because she never puts off Fa study or the exercises. Comparing myself to her makes me feel ashamed.
Although I try to maintain sending forth righteous thoughts, synchronizing with the world four times each day on the hour, I have never done it well. The ones at midnight and in the morning are OK, but the ones at noon and in the evening are easy for me to skip when I have other things to do. Recently, I read in a sharing by a fellow practitioner that she sent forth righteous thoughts every hour on the hour, around the clock. I felt so inferior, and I could not imagine myself doing it so often. How much determination and perseverance that would take! Her will is so strong and her thoughts so righteous!
Sending Forth Righteous Thoughts
I read an article on Clearwisdom about a fellow practitioner in Hubei Province who persuaded eight people to quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its associated organizations on his trip to buy breakfast in the morning. I may spend an hour or two for a couple of weeks urging one person to quit the CCP, and still might not succeed. Why? It is actually because I had not spent enough time studying the Fa and thus did not have strong enough righteous thoughts. Without sufficient righteous thoughts, we cannot save people. So studying the Fa harder and enhancing our righteous thoughts is most fundamental.
Looking Inward
Another point I want to talk about is my observation of fellow practitioners' deficiencies in looking inward. Many practitioners don't look inward and don't know how to. When facing problems, they become anxious but don't look inward. This is because many of them have not read any articles describing such experiences and thus don't see the benefits. One way to help them is to download the pamphlet Looking Inward to Diligently Advance, and ask them to read it. I found that practitioners who didn't know how to look inward at first were able to do so after reading the pamphlet. So I suggest that the information center print them and distribute them to practitioners. If this can be done, the risk of practitioners being arrested while clarifying the facts to people in China will be greatly reduced. If everyone looked inward, it would be difficult for the evil to find fault with them and persecute them. In recent years, Teacher has told us in every lecture to look inward. Once we do that, the evil's persecution will be to no avail.
Pay Attention to Safety
This is not so much one of my own problems, but I have seen and heard instances of fellow practitioners being harmed by not paying enough attention to safety. I feel that this should not happen. Teacher has time and again emphasized that practitioners in China need to be aware of safety, yet some don't listen. As soon as the situation improves slightly, they forget to heed their own safety and that of others. In fact, China is still governed by the CCP, but the methods of persecution are more hidden and devious these days. Recently a practitioner in mid-Shandong Province publicly distributed informational materials at a stand in the market. When fellow practitioners warned him, he ignored them and said that the situation had changed for the better, and that we shouldn't have the attachment to fear. As a result he was followed by the police, leading to the destruction of all information centers in neighboring districts, the jailing of ten to twenty practitioners, and the seizure of equipment valued at over two hundred thousand yuan. I was very sad to hear this. I suggest that in the future, if we encounter such practitioners, we should not come in contact with them, and let them work on materials by themselves. We should not provide them with a situation where information centers could be compromised. When I changed jobs, I didn't contact fellow practitioners in my new company, but continued communicating only with the assistant at my old company. Hiding my identify as a practitioner so that I could tell people the facts and distribute information was comparatively safer, so with the exception of the early years when I went to Beijing to appeal, I now seldom encounter any problems with the evil at my new company. I don't have access to materials, so I make fliers myself and hand them out in markets miles away. I feel that in China, we should be concerned about safety first. With security in mind, we can do the three things. If we are arrested, we won't be able to do the three things, let alone cultivate and tell others the facts. Therefore, in the current phase, I believe that Chinese practitioners should pay special attention to safety.
Please point out my deficiencies where you see them.
