(Clearwisdom.net)
Cultivation is a process of eliminating human notions and substantiating one's Buddha nature.
Notions are like a parasitic tree deeply planted in one's being. It has main trunk and dense leaves. Only when we uproot the deep-seated roots of the notion will there be a fundamental change in our cultivation, and our human nature can then elevate to Buddha nature.
During individual cultivation, whenever I read Lunyu, I immediately saw the word "notion" in the first paragraph, and when I read "Position," the word "notion" caught my eye. As I walked down the street, I saw the word "notion" on a billboard. I understood that Master was giving me a hint, but I did not know what "notion" really meant at that time. Until one day, when I read about "Buddha Nature" in Zhuan Falun:
"One's original nature has its own way of looking at things. If you can truly remove the notions formed after birth and recover the perception of your original nature, that will be where you came from, the earliest notion that you formed--that is, the notion you had at the place where you were first created. But it is very hard to vanquish thinking and notions acquired after birth, for that is what cultivation is all about."
My life was deeply touched. Even though I was still not absolutely clear, I had an initial understanding of "notions."
I longed for love and a perfect life, and these notions were lethal substances in my cultivation. The old forces created numerous tribulations around this human heart.
When I was 18 years old, I read the novel Jane Eyre and later saw the movie based on the novel. Jane Eyre, in her pursuit of dignity and spiritual equality and with her affection and versatility, and Rochester, whose heart was full of sympathy, all accompanied by the powerful and serene theme music, deeply influenced my life and my cultivation. Throughout my whole life I was scrupulously loyal to the pursuit of dignity and spiritual equality and longed for someone like Rochester, someone reliable and accountable. I was seeking a romantic marriage and life like in the movies. I liked to live a solitary life and enjoyed reading and spending most of my days involved in poetry, painting, and classical music. I was attentive to my heart and soul, preferring the spiritual world much more than the mundane material world. Those notions became wishful thinking. Even though I was completely devoted to my family, my husband was a paranoid and easily-agitated person. I felt deeply wounded and desperate. I obtained Dafa at that time and thought that this noble cultivation environment was the ideal place for mutual affection and love between people and was a place to see the true meaning of life. I began cultivation and viewed Dafa as the only place to commit my life when my marriage was a complete failure. In actuality, "The intention of using Dafa is itself an unforgivable sin." ("Dafa Cannot be Used" from Essentials for Further Advancement).
During the persecution, facing the inconstancy of human relationships and the failure of my marriage, I seemed firm in my choice to disregard the consequences. But deep down, I still concealed my ultimate attachment, which I was not consciously aware of. That was the reason why I fell big time on the issue of affection.
Master said in Zhuan Falun:
"Whenever there is interference of one kind or another in qigong practice, you should look for reasons within yourself and determine what you still have not let go."
I discovered that, on the surface, I tried my best to avoid any wrongdoing related to sentimentality, but deep down I still positioned "love" in a special place, and I still longed for friendship, affection, and care. It is wishful thinking in human life, but these notions were formed through layers and layers of particles in the space of my life, and they are actual, realistic substances. As a Dafa cultivator who carries the responsibility of helping Master rectify the Fa, whether or not you can abandon the human notion and restrain yourself has everything to do with whether the countless sentient beings survive or are destroyed in your universe. It is no longer a problem of individual cultivation and can bring eternal shame and regret. Because Master cherishes us more than we cherish ourselves, we still have a chance to do better.
In actuality, marriage is a result of karmic relationships. It is a natural way to advance the human world, but human beings use the arts to embellish, idealize, and "perfect" it. It has been the main topic of numerous famous books and award-winning movies. Human beings view love as sacred and wonderful. Sinking deeply within love and hate, one cannot free oneself, and, with bitter pursuit, one cannot reach it, as it is the karmic product of notions and thoughts and is God's most severe punishment and mental torment for human beings. From a higher being's perspective, love and its related sentiments are at an ugly, low level. As a cultivator, we have to eliminate human notions above and beyond human standards. Only then can we obtain the Tao.
After going through numerous tribulations, I finally identified the notion that had hindered me for too long. I needed to eliminate the old force arrangements through righteous thoughts and destroy the notions of affection, lust, and desire, which have contaminated me through numerous reincarnations. Only then can one go from a human being to a cultivator and truly walk on the path of godhood. The experience is like going from a caterpillar in a cocoon to a butterfly. It is a fundamental change in life.
