(Clearwisdom.net) When I read the article “Removing the Heart of Being Conscious of Hardship” in Minghui Weekly number 451, I felt the same way as the author. Thinking back over the things that I have encountered while cultivating, I would like to discuss them with practitioners so we can improve according to Dafa's principles and advance together.
A few years ago my son was in the third day of sitting his examinations to go from junior high school to high school. My job had arranged for me to travel for work, but I thought I had better not go. If my son didn't do well in his exams, he would resent me for leaving him. When the results were posted, my son only scored 13, and failed. His supervisor thought it was very strange, because his previous results suggested he would have no problem passing the high school examinations. I didn't think much about it at the time. I just thought it was a simple matter of finding someone to help him, so that he could pass the test the next time. After my son passed the tests and made it into high school, he quickly made solid progress. From a rank of 30 in his first year he jumped to number 8, and in his third year he was in first and second place. He studied Liberal Arts and wanted to attend university – and indeed his results were pretty good. Because of my attachment to his attending the most prestigious university, the result was that he again failed to pass his exams. The old forces had seen my heart of pursuit and made him miss his chance. In the end he was only able to attend an expensive private college, which was the old forces way of persecuting me financially. Over his four years of study I ended up spending more than 100,000 yuan. I didn't enlighten that I was a cultivator and that when problems came about they were not simply coincidental.
Ten days before my son was to start college, I talked with my husband about sending him to a big city to learn more about the world at large. We lived in a small county city, while the college my son would attend was in a mid-sized city. I was afraid that he would find it hard to adjust. This fear brought about serious consequences. We spent 15,000 yuan on his trip, but when he started college, he called me after about three weeks saying he didn't want to live there, didn't want to study at the college, and that he even wanted to take his own life. I had no option but to apply for leave at work and travel to his college to be with him. As I was leaving, I told my daughter to visit my 80-year-old father often. I worried that when I was gone, if he became sick, nobody would know about it and take care of him. Because of this improper thought, I had only spent a week with my son when my husband called me, saying my father was sick and had lost sight in one of his eyes. He asked if I could return home right away. Only then did I realize that I was a cultivator. Wasn't my father's illness brought about by my own pursuit? I also realized that this was to remove my attachment to sentiment. At the time it was as if two voices were speaking in my head. There was my son saying he didn't want to attend college, and there was my father saying he couldn't see. If I left my son, he would be in more of a mess. If I stayed, perhaps my father's illness would worsen. Teacher said: “Remove your human thoughts and evil will naturally die out” (“Don't Be Sad” in Hong Yin Vol. II). I put down all of these sentiment-filled mentalities, and the whole situation changed. The next day my husband called me to say that my older sister and sister-in-law had already driven my father to the city where I was staying so that he could be treated.
I began my cultivation in 1997 and therefore am a veteran practitioner. Before I began my cultivation I had a lot of illnesses. It was our great, compassionate Master who rescued me. I am deeply grateful to Master for giving me a second life. I should cultivate myself well, and only then can I face Him. But because of my poor enlightenment quality, I didn't improve according to the Fa when I encountered problems and caused myself a lot of hardship. Every time I had an improper thought and developed a pursuit, the evil took advantage of the loophole. If you are too worried about your children, the evil persecutes the children, making it hard for them to adjust to their environment and unhappy in their relations with others. Teacher said:
“If you want to return where you came from, you must have the following two factors. One is suffering. The other is enlightenment.” (“Lecture in Sydney”)
As cultivators, if we are not conscious of what we think about and say, and if we don't enlighten to the Fa's principles when we come across problems, then we will not be able to cultivate. Through studying Master's Fa, I realized that cultivation is serious. Our every thought should be in the Fa.
