(Clearwisdom.net)
Greetings, Master! Greetings, fellow practitioners!
I'd like to share my cultivation experience in the last five years since coming to the U.S. The first year or two, although the psychological pressure I experienced as a practitioner in China (where the practice is persecuted) had eased, I was perplexed by my cultivation environment. Although the cultivation environments outside and inside China would be different, overseas Dafa disciples were somewhat different from what I had thought they would be when I was still in China. At that time, I didn't really look within myself. I always thought that because overseas disciples could hear Master lecture in person, they should be very diligent.
At the end of 2006, I came to the U.S. Why was there this kind of arrangement? It must have been an environment I needed for my cultivation. Although I thought about it like this, for a long time I wasn't able to blend well with overseas Dafa disciples. I never miss a day of Fa study, doing the exercises or sending forth righteous thoughts. Yet I still couldn't find things that I could do. Although I would go to the Quit the CCP Center every week, I always felt that I was nothing more than a walking newspaper box. I used “I don't know English” and “I don't understand Cantonese” as excuses. I merely passed out newspapers. It wasn't at all like what I did in Mainland China: proactively clarifying the truth to people and persuading people to quit the CCP. When there wasn't anyone who wanted the paper, I did what disciples in China do when they leave home—they send forth righteous thoughts. So a year had passed like this. I remember when, during the 2007 New York International Fahui and parade, when we had almost reached the end, everyone called out in unison: Falun Dafa Hao! When I saw the traffic police raise their arms and also call out aloud, “Falun Dafa Hao!” I was moved to tears. The policemen overseas are so different from Mainland policemen. This was because overseas Dafa disciples have clarified the truth well. I began to feel that overseas Dafa disciples are remarkable. The prejudice I had in the beginning disappeared.
As time passed, I attended the New York Fahui every year. Slowly I felt how great was the responsibility shouldered by us. Sentient beings are waiting for us to do well, waiting for us to be rectified, waiting for us to save them. Through studying the Fa and participating in senior practitioners' Fa-study and experience sharing, I began to see where I fell short. I searched within. When I didn't search within, I didn't realize I had problems. When I searched within, I was shocked. I felt ashamed for not being diligent. I'm a veteran practitioner who has been cultivating for 15 years. How could there be so many filthy, selfish attachments? I relied on others to arrange events for clarifying the truth. When there was a need for me to go, I would participate. I thought doing it this way was okay. As long as I could follow the trend of Fa-rectification, it was okay. Actually, this is one specific manifestation of CCP culture—following orders without thinking any further and considering this good enough.
When I was studying the Fa afterwards, the following passage by Master awoke me:
“What is xinxing? It includes de (a type of matter), tolerance, enlightenment quality, sacrifice, giving up ordinary people’s different desires and attachments, being able to suffer hardships, and so on. It encompasses various things.” (Zhuan Falun, Lecture One, 2000 Translation Version)
I thought: Master wanted us to pay attention to xinxing when cultivating, yet what have I accomplished? I didn't even accomplish the most basic thing—bearing hardships. How could I have given up the various desires and attachments? I began to think: There are only two places that I could go to save people: the Quit the CCP Center and the Chinese Consulate. The Chinese Consulate is a very evil place. Cold winds always blow there. I found out that there was only one practitioner who continued going to the Consulate for 10 years, a close-to-ninety-year-old Mr. Hu. He said, “I'll come here every day as long as the evil party hasn't disintegrated.” What spirit! In contrast, I'm nearly twenty years his junior, but there is a big difference. Going to the Chinese Consulate wasn't as convenient as going to Chinatown, but I thought: I'm a Dafa disciple. I have to be able to bear hardships. So my spouse and I decided to go to the Chinese Consulate alternately Monday to Friday, to send forth righteous thoughts and to clarify the truth. On Saturdays, we would join the big group practice and senior practitioners' Fa study. On Sundays, we would go to the Tuidang Center. Although we feel physical hardship sometimes, we are full of determination. I feel as long as I can have the Fa enter my heart when I study, there are no distracting thoughts when sending righteous thoughts and I can persuade people to quit the CCP in front of the Consulate all the same. Although the Chinese Consulate's field is very evil, the various people who go there for paperwork as well as consulate workers are all sentient beings who we need to save. Master wants us to save everyone without differentiating. Especially after the arrival of a Hong Kong practitioner at the Quit the CCP Center, her tireless spirit of saving people touched me. What I lacked is precisely this kind of spirit of clarifying the truth in depth. Like what Master said,
'They’ll say just a few words to people, thinking “Listen or don’t listen, just do whatever you like. You don’t want to listen, fine!” and they’ll go on to find the next person.' (“What is a Dafa Disciple”)
During this year's New York Fa conference, Master said:
“I hope to see you regaining your enthusiasm and getting back to your best cultivation state.” (“What is a Dafa Disciple”)
I recalled the early days of my cultivation. Fifteen years ago, in order to promote the Fa, we rode bikes for more than an hour to join large group activities. Whenever there was a gathering, there would be more than a thousand people. What kind environment was that?! Even though we have forgotten, Master didn't forget. He wants us to get back to our former cultivation state. I want to regain the dedication of 15 years ago. Many people think that persuading people to quit the CCP in front of the Chinese Consulate is more difficult. Firstly, evil concentrates there and has blocked people from being saved. Secondly, they are afraid that if the consulate workers find out, they won't be able to get their visas, and they are also afraid of getting into trouble after going back to Mainland China. Therefore, many times we would wait until they're done with paperwork to give them truth clarification material and to persuade them to quit the CCP.
Once when persuading a young man to quit the CCP, I found out that he was a Mainland traveler who had lost his passport. He came here for another passport. When he understood the truth after listening to my me, he immediately agreed to withdraw from the CCP. He was also pleased with the alias that I made for him. I asked him whether he has a copy of software to breakthrough the Internet blockade. He said he had one. I asked him where he got it. He said that there is information on how to get it printed on paper currency. The information spread quickly this way. The more the CCP blocks the Internet, the more they want to see. After listening to him, I really said hooray for Mainland Chinese disciples. No wonder Master praised Mainland disciples at the New York Fa conference.
Unlike before, now when I ask people to quit the CCP, I'm not anxious. Instead, I tell someone why he should quit and listen to his questions. I met two young friends. The young man wanted to hear more, but the young woman wanted to leave quickly. When the young man asked about self immolation, I told him the various questionable points in the staged incident of self immolation. A fellow practitioner immediately handed him a copy of self immolation truth clarification material. He was very happy. I asked if he had a copy of software to breakthrough the Internet blockade. He said that he and his schoolmates all knew about it. Mainland Falun Gong practitioners have also given them the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party. I said: “Did you know that they were risking their lives by giving them to you?” They did it in order to save you so that you won't be dragged down with the CCP when it is destroyed by heaven. Here, I can tell you freely without any worry, but in Mainland China, they face many dangers. You should cherish the truth they told you. The woman stopped urging him to leave and listened quietly on the side. In the end, he said he will carefully read the material and will go on the Internet himself to quit the CCP. I told him, your life has been saved. I am very happy. After returning to Mainland China, tell your friends, relatives, and schoolmates to quit online quickly and cherish their lives. He left happily.
Once I was clarifying the truth to a man and gave him some truth clarification material. He didn't want to accept it. I said to him: “In this world there are those who would deceive you for money and there are those who would deceive you for sex, but there isn’t anyone who would deceive you to save you. Take a look. It will truly benefit you.” Just then, someone passing by heard what I said, and immediately asked for a copy. Upon seeing someone else take it, he immediately said, “Give me one, too.” I said, “Don't be anxious. I'll definitely give you one. I truly care for your well being.” He said cordially, “Thank you. I'll certainly take a look at it when I go back.” Once there were two youngsters who came to the Quit the CCP Center. Upon asking, I found that they indeed came from Mainland China. I had a thought in my mind that I must save them. I asked them if they had read the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party, and I gave them some truth clarification material and a copy of that day’s The Epoch Times. I told them that this is something they can't see in Mainland China. I asked them to quit the CCP. They asked what would happen if they quit. I said, “When you quit, you won't be taken down with the CCP when it meets its impending doom. You're so young. Your life has just begun. I'm over 70 years old. I won't lie to you. Both of you look very kind. I'll give you aliases. Quit the CCP, the Communist Youth League, and the Young Pioneers here at our Tuidang Center. Remove these shackles. Won’ it be good to live freely?” They said: “Okay.” One of them wanted to make his own alias.
There are many touching stories and things that boost my confidence when I clarify the truth and save sentient beings. I truly feel that in doing these things, all we do is just open our mouths and move our legs. Actually, it's Master who's doing this. I also hope that more fellow practitioners would regain the enthusiasm they had when they first obtained the Fa, cherish the last moment, and join the current of saving sentient beings.
Thank you, Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners!