(Clearwisdom.net)
Greetings, venerable Master!
Greetings, fellow practitioners!
Some fellow practitioners told me that the Eighth Internet Experience Sharing Conference for Practitioners in China had begun to ask for articles. The submission period was open for one month. I thought: It seemed to me that the seventh conference just ended yesterday. Time flies! A year had already passed. How many contributions had I made in saving sentient beings? Had I truly assisted Master in the Fa-rectification? I still had many attachments. I suddenly had a sense of urgency to participate in this rare occasion. The Fa's enrichment and Master's compassionate protection have enabled me to embark on a wonderful journey to rise out of the mud and enter a pure land.
Connecting with a Sacred Predestined Relationship
Since my adolescence, I had fibrous dysplasia, which is an incurable disease of the bone. As I got older, all my bones would deteriorate. Surgery was the only solution. The surgeons removed the decayed portions of bone and had to strengthen or replace the weakened bones with bone from other parts of my body. When one part of my body was cut open, they would only find that the bones there were not good enough to use. The incisions from every surgery left me with several scars. I had no good bones anymore, and the hospital had to obtain bones of an aborted eight-month-old infant to sustain me. The principal doctor told me: “Try qigong. Maybe that can cure you.”
My father loved me very much and exhausted all means to try and seek a cure for my illness. He once heard that there was a famous fortune teller near our hometown in northeastern China. People said that this fortune teller was able to go to other dimensions to look at the reason for diseases. Many celebrities had also been to see him.
My mom traveled a long distance to visit this fortune teller. The fortune teller asked her for the date and time of my birth. Then she was able to tell my mom what I looked like. She also told my mom that I would never get married. When my mom asked her about my illness, she said that I was once in heaven and came to the human world without permission. When a god found out, he whipped me three times in three different places: my waist, hipbone and knees. These are exactly the locations where I felt pain and had three operations done. I didn't know what drove me to come to the secular world, ignoring heaven's rules and regulations. It is so painful down here.
I knew this illness would accompany me for the rest of my life. I didn't want to live even one more minute. I was also horrified that I was going downward and rapidly falling into an abyss.
Just when I was coming to the end of my life, it changed – I encountered Falun Dafa. Then I realized that life was not meant to be painful. The wait of generations was truly painful. And, the reason I had to come to this human world was for this Fa!
When I was about 12 years old, every night I would see a scene once I closed my eyes to go to sleep. I was standing on one side of a door with metal bars and barbed wire. There was another “me” standing on the other side of the door. The other “me” was transparent, light and shining. My sixth sense told me that this was another me. We looked at each other quietly and looked at the barbed wire on the door. I felt good even though every cell in my body was poked by the barbed wire. I wondered: how did I make it through the metal door? What is this message about?
I learned about incompetence and the frustrations of being a human during that time. The same dream lasted for about two years. It appeared once more during my exercises after I started my cultivation. Then I suddenly understood: it was a high-level body composed of high energy substance! The purpose of my life is to return to my true self. I should continuously relinquish my human notions, overcome layers upon layers of hardship in different dimensions generated by karma accumulated lifetime after lifetime. Break free from the lowest level realm, get rid of any entanglements and return to my true self!
“In fact, today's human race would have been destroyed a long time ago if it weren't for the Fa-rectification. The standard of the human race's thinking is already at a level lower than hell. It's because of the Fa-rectification that I atoned for the sins of all sentient beings in the Three Realms. (Applause) So think about it, as far as our students are concerned, it was as if I scooped you out of hell back then. (Applause) I have truly borne for you the sins you committed over hundreds and thousands of years. And it doesn't stop at just that. Because of this, I will also save you and turn you into Gods. I have spared no effort for you in this process. Along with this, since you'll become Gods at levels that high, I have to give you the honors of Gods at levels that high and all the blessings that you need to have at levels that high. (Applause) Never, from the beginning of time, has any God dared to do this. Something like this has never happened before.” (“Fa-Lecture During the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference”)
Whenever I read Master's Fa, I had tears in my eyes. I knew clearly that my life was bestowed by the Fa and extended by Master. It doesn't belong to myself. Therefore, I also felt that there was nothing to worry about or fear.
Saving Sentient Beings and Fulfilling My Vows
Master said in “Explaining the Fa During the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference:”
“Except for newer students, from July 20 of 1999 on, Master hasn't created any personal cultivation tests for you, and that's because overall your personal cultivation has changed in every respect so that it's in the direction of saving sentient beings and validating Dafa.”
Master also taught us in “Touring North America to Teach the Fa:”
“You've got to try hard, and you've got to do well, because what you want is to consummate everything, and you have responsibilities--you have come with the mission and responsibility of saving sentient beings. Throughout history people have declared that they would save sentient beings. But who knew the true meaning of saving sentient beings? You are truly saving sentient beings, and only you are worthy of doing something this magnificent. Make sure you don't lose this opportunity!”
After July 20, 1999, some fellow practitioners and I went to Beijing to appeal for Falun Gong several times and saw the evil escalate the persecution again and again. We realized that we had to validate the Fa locally. With much grief and sadness, I anxiously distributed truth-clarification materials with the words, “Master and Dafa are good! They have been slandered!” written on the flyers.
Once when I stood on the street with the flyers in my hand, fellow practitioner Zilian saw me and asked, “What are you doing here?” I told her that I simply wanted to hand out flyers there. Several years later, another practitioner said that he had seen me distributing truth-clarification materials. I entered a store where he was making a purchase, and put a flyer on the counter, turned around and left. He saw that it was me, got scared and immediately left the store without purchasing anything.
Initially, we had to travel quite far to fetch truth-clarification materials or we paid a high price for getting the materials printed locally. So we later thought about making the materials ourselves. Master said:
“Cultivation depends on one’s own efforts, while the transformation of gong is done by one’s master. It is good enough if you have this wish.” (Zhuan Falun)
We have gone through a lot over the years, from establishing the materials production site to distributing them. However, with Master's compassionate protection we have miraculously been able to overcome all types of danger. We leave home with many different types of truth-clarification materials, from stamps to markers, and gradually let people know the facts in different locations using various methods, tailor-made content and “Fa instruments.”
I have all kinds of “Fa instruments” in this regard, and often joke with fellow practitioners: “I am very poor, but also very rich.” I wouldn't have achieved this with my financial situation, but I know Master has given me these things. When I put up a poster and saw another person approach, I stayed close to the poster and read it carefully. After I walked away, I looked back and could see that the person was still reading the poster with much curiosity. I stayed calm and rational. I'm able to go anywhere during the day and at night. I truly feel that I am a messenger from the heavens and I am saving sentient beings in this area by carrying out my mission.
Even though my township is small, the population is still in the hundreds of thousands when you include all the different villages. The majority of the population is scattered in the rural areas. After spending a long time on handing out truth-clarification materials in the urban area, we had covered it entirely. Over these recent years, I have worked with a fellow practitioner called Qinglian to deliver truth-clarification materials to the rural villages. I folded the color pamphlets and flyers we printed and took the truth-clarification stamps and spray paint with us. I looked at the high-quality truth-clarification materials, and said to them in my heart: “You shoulder very important responsibilities. We should try hard together to enable sentient beings to understand the truth!” After preparing everything, we took a taxi, and then walked to the villages and distributed the materials at clean and appropriate locations. My mind was full of righteous thoughts.
Qinglian is a local, and is very familiar with the different routes and the villagers' habits and preferences. She doesn't talk much but she has great ideas. Therefore in the process, I didn't have to think too much, but simply focused on sending forth righteous thoughts and cooperating with her unconditionally. We complemented each other due to our different personalities. Our cooperation was very good.
The roads in the rural areas are very bumpy, and sometimes I walked on these roads in the dark. Some areas are quite deserted and only have several households scattered around. I looked at all of these living beings suffering in different corners of the world, and thought about how Master had said that all the people were his family members. I felt for them and thought: “I have delivered truth-clarification materials to your door. This is a rare opportunity. Please read them carefully!” We also put up truth-clarification banners on the lamp posts. After all was done, we waited on the side of the street for buses to come past. We were usually able to get a ride. Sometimes we encountered difficulties too, but were able to return home safely with Master's arrangement.
We usually went out at night for about four to five hours. When we returned home, sometimes it was past 3 a.m. Our old approach to delivering materials was slow, expensive and not very efficient. However, Qinglian knew how to ride a motorcycle, so we bought one together. Once we rode it, I realized that riding through the rural mountain paths required very good driving skills, and Qinglian was such a tiny person. When we rode fast through the night, sometimes we were shivering with cold.
I was nervous at first, especially when we faced a truck coming in the opposite direction on very narrow roads. Sometimes, there was a deep trench on the right side of the road, and when cars stormed by we barely had enough time to move out of the way. Later I thought, “What am I worried about?” I should save sentient beings in a dignified manner and absolutely should not accept any evil persecution and interference! I became at ease after that.
Our motorcycle broke down once in the middle of our journey, and we had to push it. Qinglian told me that it would take us an hour to get there like this. The next possible repair shop was at least 20 minutes away, and it might not be open at this late hour. She asked me to decide what we should do. I said we should continue and if there was no repair shop, we would then turn back. I thought it would be nice to post truth-clarification banners on our way.
Several minutes later we saw a repair shop, and it was open! Our motorcycle was quickly fixed, and they didn't want any payment from us. It was as if it was only open for us and they were waiting for us. This was obviously Master's arrangement! Through this, I sensed the historical mission that Master bestowed upon us and the hopes of countless sentient beings incorporated in our sacred vows. Nobody had this honor before us and nobody will after us. Let's cherish the unprecedented blessing of saving sentient beings!
Several months ago, I dreamed that I was in an unknown big city. It had a high-tech environment, and the skyscrapers had very clean windows. All of a sudden, the earth started rumbling with a loud noise. The skyscrapers fell one after another, just like those special effects in movies. When they fell, they disintegrated to small molecules, falling, floating around and finally disappearing. People were running around crazily. In all the chaos, one person asked me for help but they couldn't grab on to my clothes... I was shocked beyond words, and my heart was broken. I burst into tears as soon as I woke up. My first thought was, “Hurry to save people.”
This might be the manifestations of sentient beings in my paradise! Master said in “Touring North America to Teach the Fa:”
“If you don't cultivate well, many beings will be weeded out, and when you reach Consummation, when you return to your place, you'll find that an extremely large number of beings who at one time put infinite hope in you have been weeded out. Then in this cosmic colossal firmament, it's very possible that the cosmic bodies you represent will be in a broken and incomplete state, and countless sentient beings will have been weeded out.”
The Fa-rectification is at its final stage. I know I must cultivate myself well, seize the time to save sentient beings, and be worthy of Master's salvation and the expectations of sentient beings!
The Amazing Power of Respectfully Studying the Fa
When I first obtained the Fa, I often had “light-bulb moments” when I enlightened to new Fa principles, and my mind was relatively pure. However, recently I experienced less and less of this, and my mind was often adrift. Even though my eyes are on the text when reading, my mind drifted away. I was controlled by my notions and karma. When I snapped out of daydreaming, I had already read through several pages.
At the end of group Fa study, my mind was a blank. I couldn't remember what I had read, and I didn't truly study the Fa. I was encouraged by fellow practitioners' experience sharings of memorizing the Fa. I followed suit. I memorized the Fa four times, but didn't sense any improvement other than the excitement of having done it. One day, I was listening to Master's audio lecture, and suddenly heard: “My Fa is not for you to memorize as a game!” I was shocked and realized the severity of my situation – I didn't respect Master and the Fa!
I made up my mind to study the Fa with utter focus and tranquility. I set aside all of my other projects and read Zhuan Falun word by word by holding the book in my hands. I focused on studying the Fa and would drag my mind back to concentrate on the book once I realized that I was adrift. I re-read the parts that I didn't pay attention to the first time. I read every character with my heart, as if I had never read the Fa before. I took all of the words through my heart, into my brain and into the deep layers of my mind.
Gradually, I was able to study the Fa with tranquility. I felt that my every cell was in shock, as if it were completely cleansed. All of my human emotions and mentalities disappeared. It is so great when a living being is completely assimilated to the Fa! How can the show-off mentality, jealousy, complaining and arrogance exist? How can such a living being be so absent-minded during Fa study? My past confusion and difficulties disappeared like smoke into the air.
As I continued studying the Fa, I noticed that I was different. My heart was all about being responsible to the Fa and for other lives. As I read the book, I was amazed, and said to myself: “This Fa is so precious! I don't want to waste even one second.” I held the book in my hands and read it for a long time. I felt as though I was stepping onto a bridge going into other dimensions. I suddenly saw the boundlessness of the Buddha Fa, and I was brought to tears by the profundity and immensity of the Fa!
I really experienced what Master said in “Fa Teaching at the 2009 Greater New York International Fa Conference:”
“Nor can you grasp what it meant when Master said that everything has been compressed into the book of Fa, for at this time you cannot, with your human thoughts, fathom that sentence. Everything can be gained there; it all depends on how much you put your heart into it and what your state of mind is. Everything can be gained through the book of Fa. But cultivation is a serious matter, and you can't be the least bit sloppy with it. If you bring with you any of a variety of impure thoughts when you study the Fa, the book, you will see nothing and gain nothing. Many Dafa disciples have remarked that when a person is persecuted for a long time it is as if he doesn't improve any by reading the Fa. Actually, the problem is that at those times your brain is preoccupied with persecution, and you cannot quiet your mind. Cultivation is serious. You have to be able to ensure a pure and sincere state when you study, and cultivate, and only then will you make improvements and get results.”
An unstoppable force emerged from the bottom of my heart. I felt that I was like a lion waking up after many years of sleep. I dusted myself off, stood up and said firmly: “I am going to walk this cultivation path to the end! Who dares to block me? Who dares?” My voice was strong and resonated powerfully. My diamond-like determination was no longer shakable.
I had finally learned what Fa study meant. Just like when Master told us that our enlightened side knows what to do, if we can study the Fa well every day, then layers upon layers of Fa principles will reveal themselves for us. The more I assimilate to the Fa, the more I can experience the power of Fa-rectification, the magnificence of assisting Master to rectify the Fa, and the sense of urgency for saving sentient beings. Then everything in the secular world becomes so trivial.
Becoming Mature Through Coordination Work
I think it is very hard to be a good coordinator. I am very enthusiastic, but I don't like to get involved with the details. Once I see trouble or conflicts, I shy away. For a long time, coordination work was an obligation for me, but not a responsibility. However, it is precisely because it is difficult that our will can be tempered and sculpted during the process. My willpower was strengthened, and I found a lot of my attachments by looking inward. Without the strong sense of responsibility and rationality for the Fa, one can easily be influenced by illusions of all kinds.
For so many years, I haven't shied away from spreading Master's lectures and truth-clarification materials and helping practitioners. My choice is not an option, and I do whatever is needed. Fellow practitioners like to share their experiences with me. Once they have problems such as family conflicts or sickness karma, they like to discuss them with me. I also help with other things such as buying, installing and repairing MP3 players.
When I think that practitioners are experiencing cultivation issues, I make an appointment with him or her and share openly. Over 10 practitioners who live a little bit far away also hope that we can go and share with them often. I set aside a certain amount of time every day for Fa study and making truth-clarification materials. Some days everything is handled well, some days it may be hectic. Although I wish I could have more time, I'm still happy.
I hope that every practitioner can walk their own path of validating the Fa. I saw that several practitioners had a good cultivation environment at home and suggested that they visit the Minghui website (Chinese version of Clearwisdom). Unfortunately, for some reason they are only able to browse the Internet, and not able to develop into truth-clarification materials production sites. So I suggested some different approaches for validating the Fa according to different practitioners' strengths. Cell phones and all types of truth-clarification stamps have become small Fa instruments. All types of truth-clarification materials, CDs and money with truth-clarification messages on them are also used. For those who are good at expressing themselves, I suggested that they use Shen Yun DVDs and face-to-face truth-clarification. For those with concerns, I suggested that they could use truth-clarification stamps and truth-clarification money. Those who are working send cell phone text messages and make phone calls to clarify the facts. Those who are able to put up posters and distribute materials.
I have also experienced tribulations in preparing materials. Every time, I sent over CDs and pamphlets as soon as they were done. However, some practitioners thought I gave them too few or provided them with the materials too late. When I went with a big bag of truth-clarification materials, I often heard comments like, “Only this much?” Some practitioners even said, “If you are not able to produce the materials, I will get them from out of town...”
When I printed out a few copies of the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party one time, several of the lines were faded due to a lack of ink, but they were still readable. So I gave them to a fellow practitioner. When I walked out of her apartment building, I heard her calling me from the window. I looked up, and saw the Nine Commentaries being thrown down to my feet: “Go back and do it again!” I thought that I had tried my best. Why did I deserve this after contributing most of my time and energy? Then I thought about how fellow practitioners complained to me when they had trouble. They pushed their responsibilities over to me. I felt that no one understood me. Sadness and an imbalance in my heart made me feel down every day. I had no one to share with. Then I had to look inward.
Once I looked inward, I found a lot of problems: I was not able to handle criticism, and I looked down on others. I was frustrated. When I was nice to others there was a purpose behind it: I wanted to be recognized and have a good reputation. I was afraid of upsetting others. Fellow practitioners said I maintained a low profile. In fact, it was because I was afraid that no one would pay attention to what I had to say.
Even after I found the reasons behind my attachments, I still felt discomfort. Then I studied the Fa. I read “Teaching the Fa at the 2002 Fa Conference in Boston:”
“They are in a state of immense tolerance, of mercy toward all beings, and of being able to understand everything with kindness. To put it in human terms, they're always able to be understanding of others.”
I realized that I didn't think of others! Why didn't I have the heart for being responsible for living beings? Strictly speaking, coordinators are those who are willing to be responsible for everyone. We need to cultivate away the selfishness of the old universe and get rid of all principles in the old universe. We are the protectors of the universe and the truth in the universe. What we forge are enlightened beings with broad minds and immense tolerance. We should be able to give up everything for sentient beings and the universe. Why are we distracted by small issues?
I suddenly came to understand that a Dafa disciple should be brave to let go of everything and take responsibility! When I look back at what happened over these few years, it was laid out for me to improve. Wasn't it a path for my return? When I calmly faced what I went through, I had no complaints. I could clearly feel my capacity of tolerance expanding. I couldn't think of anything that I found annoying.
Fellow practitioner Zilian once told me: “You are like the little monk who cooks and works hard. You do everything. Now you are even too busy for Fa study. It won't do! You have to stick to the Fa principles. You have contributed to fellow practitioners' problems.” My first reaction was: “What? I contributed to their problems? It is my problem now?”
When I thought about it again, I could see her point. I was a little monk and was so busy. The “senior monks” didn't have much to do, and they didn't improve. Sometimes, I cut the stickers and assembled the pamphlets before I sent them to practitioners. Didn't I contribute to their attachment of depending on others? Didn't I invite my current busy state? How could I treat such sacred things as troubles and take all of them on as my own? Didn't I deprive my fellow practitioners of their opportunities to establish mighty virtue? I should change my approach and leave some tasks for practitioners who are capable of doing them.
When I saw the practitioners again, they were all very friendly towards me. None of them was picky or complained. A practitioner told me with much tolerance: “Oh, you are too busy. I can fold them myself if you don't have the time.” Their change of attitude was the result of my improvement. I experienced the amazing power of looking inward through Fa study! I would like to thank my precious fellow practitioners from the bottom of my heart. Thank you for your timely kind reminders and criticism, selfless support and encouragement!
Since I started cultivation, I have dreamed of picking up all types of pens. I knew that Master reminded me to cultivate and measure everything against the Fa. (The Chinese character 笔 for “pen” is pronounced the same as 比 which means, “measure against.”) Many fellow practitioners shared about “the divine pen” as a Fa instrument in their articles. I thought: “I have picked up so many pens. Why wouldn't there be a divine pen among them?”
I cannot always look for cultivation shortcuts from fellow practitioners' sharings and always seek to take, rather than give. I should give back and sincerely share my cultivation experiences with fellow practitioners to enrich our Dafa website.
Thank you, venerable Master!
Thank you, fellow practitioners.