(Minghui.org) “This Fa states even more clearly how insidious the evil party culture is. I thought that Party culture only affected those most evil beings in China, but later I realized that none of the youth in China can escape the evil doctrines, and that we are all poisoned. That's why most children rebel against their parents' rules and regulations, and claim that it's because of the “age-gap.” Actually, this is a deviated notion. The conflict between young people and their parents is the clash of two cultures. We no longer have compassion, loyalty, etiquette, wisdom, or integrity, and in particular, we cannot tolerate criticism from anyone. People today are short-tempered, only concerned about themselves, and indulge in leisure. These deep-seated notions have been preventing me from elevating, and I realized it only after a dozen years of cultivation in Dafa.”
– The author
Greetings, revered Master! Greetings, fellow practitioners!
I would like to share my cultivation experience of how I eliminated my attachment to the Chinese Communist Party culture.
When I was 16 I attended school out of town. When I came home on one school holiday, my mother told me that she’d begun practicing Falun Gong and asked me to learn it, too. We lived in the countryside and didn't have a TV, so any information was very limited. I didn't know what Falun Gong was, but as I was a very obedient child, I told my mother I would begin Dafa cultivation.
1. Don't Pursue “Trends” in the Human World
I looked at the Falun emblem and thought that I’d seen it before. I remembered in 1995 there were four or five people spreading Dafa near our school. I wanted to find out about it and headed toward them, but because we had to walk in formation, my teacher stopped me, saying, “Don't go over there, it's all superstitious stuff.” Later, upon reflection, I felt sorry that I had been poisoned by the communist party culture and could not evaluate things rationally, and just blindly followed orders.
After I finished reading Zhuan Falun the first time, I felt what it said was so right. When I did the meditation the first time, I was able to sit for one hour like my mother. When I returned to school, I took the book with me and read whenever I had time. I got up earlier than my classmates to meditate for half an hour. At that time, my classmates often went out shopping and to eat. I believed that as a student, I should focus on learning, so I did not go out with them. So my nine roommates would not play with me, and they even said that I was antisocial, and that I was not trendy. I did feel lonely but then I remembered what Master taught me in Zhuan Falun,
“As a human being, you are a good person only if you can follow this universe’s characteristic of Zhen-Shan-Ren. A person who deviates from this characteristic is truly a bad person. In the workplace or in society, some people may say that you are bad, yet you may not necessarily be bad. Some people may say that you are good, but you may not really be good. As a practitioner, if you assimilate yourself to this characteristic you are one that has attained the Tao—it’s just such a simple principle.”
I thought that as long as I listened to Master, I would be all right. I didn't mind my fellow students' attitudes, and whenever they needed help I helped them wholeheartedly. When they mistreated me, I didn't fight back.
When they were not around, I did the exercises and listened to Dafa music. My test scores were always the highest. Because I was responsible in everything I did, I was assigned a lot of tasks. My classmates gradually changed their attitudes, and began to admire me. When we had an election for classroom president, I won 98% of the votes.
2. Withdrawing from the Party
The persecution began less than a year after we obtained Dafa. We were the only family who practiced Falun Gong in our village. My mother and I never doubted Dafa. I was very worried for Master and asked my mother, “What if the international police see Master?” She replied, “Not to worry. Even if they walk toward Master, they will not be able to see him.”
I attended college and again my scores were at the top of the class, so I took on many responsibilities in different associations. I also set up an association offering study guidance and experience to help students who were struggling academically. My classmates admired me for what I did and recommended that I join the Party. I joined, thinking it would help land me a good job. I knew that Dafa was good, and that the Party was not righteous, so when I made my vow towards the flag, I said, “Falun Dafa is good, I am a Dafa practitioner.”
When I came home for New Year's Eve, I read Master's scripture, "We Are Not 'Getting Political,'"
“Actually, it's not all that wrong for the people of this world to live for power or their own gain, but why do you have to join the ranks of those wicked beings that poison and harm the human race? People, you need to wake up! If you have truly lost sight of the purpose of being human, then nothing could be more terrible! If you, as somebody in this world, are truly waiting for and searching for the path of return, then wise up!”
I was deeply shocked. Even when the persecution started in 1999, and when the staged Tiananmen Self-Immolation incident occurred, I had not woken up to the fact that I had to completely stay away from the evil Party. Without thinking rationally, I joined it for the sake of finding a good job. I wondered how many others did things like this against their conscience for the sake of making a good living?
I realized that even if it had been perfunctory, it was not right. I began to cry, saying I was sorry that I had let Master down. I’d been in the CCP for two months and wanted to know how I could quit. I was going to graduate soon—what would I do after graduation?” Mother reminded me that we have Master Li looking after us so we have nothing to worry about. After that I made up my mind to never associate with the evil Party. Later Master published the scripture “Turning the Wheel Towards the Human World” about quitting the party and its affiliated organizations to save sentient beings, and some fellow practitioners quit the Party with pseudonyms. I quit using my real name.
3. Cultivation
a. Graduation
After I learned the Fa, I changed completely and became very healthy. Before then I was always weak, often taking medicine for various ailments. When I went for the college physical, I was very healthy and full of energy, and my high school classmates could see how much I had changed!
I did very well in college, and, as graduation approached, several friends and teachers encouraged me to apply for a position on the faculty. They advised me, “Go find someone with power, give them some money, and you will be sure to stay. This is, after all, the most important time of your life.” I thought of the evil Party culture of bribing to gain position and realized I was a cultivator, and many teachers and students knew that I practiced Falun Gong. I should be hired according to my ability in an upright and dignified manner. It turned out that I was eliminated after the first round of exams. My classmates all felt this was unfair. Even if only one remained, that should have been me. Later we learned that the person who was hired had bribed someone with thousands of yuan. I couldn't bear it any longer, so I went to the president and asked, “Was it because of my poor test score or something else?” He replied, “I know you are very capable and your score was excellent, but the department leader rejected you due to your gender.” I was not convinced and developed resentment toward the person who rejected me.
Whenever I felt that a tribulation was too big, and felt helpless and stuck, I read Zhuan Falun, and this time the very first thing I read was the following,
“We therefore believe in following the course of nature. Sometimes, you think that something should be yours, and others also tell you that it is yours. Actually, it is not. You may believe that it is yours, but in the end it is not yours. Through this, it can be seen whether you can give it up. If you cannot let it go, it is an attachment. This method must be used to get rid of your attachment to self-interest. This is the issue. Because everyday people are not enlightened to this principle, they will all compete and fight before profits.” (Zhuan Falun)
I suddenly realized that I was in the wrong. Beside the attachment to good benefits, I had also developed a strong attachment to fighting for the position. Jealousy and looking down on others also surfaced.
After graduation, I went to another teaching school. I met the student who’d bribed the last school and learned that he had borrowed money and sold his house in order to bribe the official. I suddenly felt sorry for him. Just for that little benefit, he had to curry favor and bow down to his leaders. He had been used and poisoned by the evil communist party culture. That day I felt fortunate that the school didn't hire me. I didn't go with the culture of the party and I was able to find many of my attachments and realize that true elevation involve giving up, not pursuing. I sincerely clarified the facts of Dafa to him and persuaded him to quit the Party and its organizations, because a cultivator has no enemies.
b. Righteous Thoughts Generate Righteous Power
After we graduated, we had dinner with the teachers and classmates. One teacher insisted that I drink wine with him even though he knew that I practiced Falun Dafa and did not drink alcohol. He said that if I didn't drink, I wouldn't be accepted in society, and he insisted that if I learned now, I would be OK in the future. I asked Master, “Please help me, I cannot not drink wine!” Suddenly, the teacher leaned against the table, fell down, and could not get up. It was as if he was in a coma. Several male classmates took him home. We were all surprised at how he got drunk so quickly. I then remembered that he was the Party secretary, and because he was forcing me to drink, Master eliminated the evil behind him, and then he collapsed.
c. Becoming a Teacher
All my classmates were looking for jobs, too. When I filled out the forms, I hesitated and didn’t know what to do. I tore up all the materials related to the evil party, as I’d already quit and would not rely on it to get a good job. Later when I filled out forms that wanted to know my party affiliation, I answered, “Democratic, no party affiliation.” I quickly found a job, and I am very happy since teaching is a sacred profession.
One day after school, I played a truth clarification DVD for my colleagues. Several days later the principal asked me to come to his office. I knew what it was about as the police station is near the school, and they had a very good relationship. I was afraid. Then I thought, “I am a Dafa practitioner; no one can touch me.” We talked all afternoon in his office. The principal, who had retired from the military, was very articulate. He acknowledged that the Party did not do things correctly, but he also tried to persuade me to think about my future. I explained to him, “This gong is very good. I’ve already made my mind up. I hope you can understand. Since becoming a practitioner I’ve always abided by the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. I’ve played a positive role in school. I do not have money or power, but I have my health and live happily and with purpose. I also teach my students this way and their academic scores are the highest. If you think that I’ve caused any inconvenience to the school, I can leave. I hope you will read the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party and will realize what the Party has done to people.” The principal said, “It is not easy to find someone with your standards. You may go back now, just don't tell everyone that you practice Falun Gong.” From that point on, whenever I ran into him, I told him, “Dafa is good” and kept encouraging him to quit the Party. Three months later he did quit the CCP!
Since obtaining Dafa, I have been going to school or working away from my hometown. I could not access the Minghui website or read Minghui Weekly, and I couldn’t find any other practitioners. I went to an office supply store and bought paper stickers to make my own messages, and posted them in residential buildings. I was not afraid at all. I believed that I was doing a most righteous thing, so what should I be afraid of? I took several dozen each time and was able to get them posted very quickly. I lived in a dormitory and my colleagues liked to sleep, so I’d take my MP3 player into an empty classroom to do the standing exercises. They usually got up after I had finished. I’d do the sitting meditation when they all fell asleep. What bothered me most was their snoring. I wished for a quiet place. Shortly after, the school did arrange another, quieter place for me. One time the school had a conflict with the landlord, and our water and electricity were shut off, so all my colleagues moved out. I stayed. I studied the Fa when I did not have class during the day and read by candlelight at night. I was not afraid at all, because I knew Master was looking after me. I was safe.
Several of my colleagues eventually also quit the CCP. One dean was very practical and used all sorts of ways to pursue fame and benefits. She even helped someone cheat the system to enroll in a Master's degree program. She asked me to help with some of her classes. Many colleagues were impressed with her ways of doing things. I clarified the truth to her many times, but she would not listen. She told me, “Open your mind. My outlook on life depends on money and power. That way, I can do whatever I want. I know you are a good person and willing to help others, but how can you help others without power and money? I recently helped somebody sell a position in college. Can you do that?” Her behavior disgusted me. So now a “good job” and “advanced degrees” were no longer valid. They were intellectuals in name only, totally under the influence of Party culture. Anyone with money could purchase a position of power in any chosen career. I was so disgusted with the Chinese Communist Party that I kept moving further and further away from it.
d. Becoming a Businesswoman
I was lucky to find a job in a non-state-owned enterprise. I put my last hope for justice and freedom in this job. I felt that this time, I’d truly left the evil Party far behind. I quit my job as a teacher and became a manager in a product company. I contacted many people, and my sincerity and consideration impressed many clients. They all wanted to work with me.
Before the year was over, I’d managed to order a large number of products from a particular factory, and the head of the factory wanted to reward me, but I refused to accept it. He didn't understand, as this career relied on commissions. In this expensive city, you could not get by on just one salary. Bonus commissions over a few years would allow you to purchase a house and a car. I clarified the facts about Dafa to him and said that I practiced Dafa, so I could not take his money. He said that because of me he was able to make a lot more profit each year. He asked me to go out for dinner, but I refused that, too. He put down some money, and before I could refuse it, he left quickly. I used the money for Dafa projects, but later I felt it was not pure, so I returned the money to him.
I never cheated any clients, and I gave them all good advice. There was once an important product to be produced in a hurry, and since it was the end of the year, all the factories were busy. I followed up with a factory for two days and asked for their help. That factory was in a suburb and the first day I didn't get back home until 10:00 p.m. The factory head was impressed and helped to make the product available on time. The product received a very good review and the client was very happy. My manager said I even finished her job. I didn't think too much about it at the time, as I just wanted to get things done. It was just like what Master stated,
“I often say this: when people obsess about the thought of doing something or want to obtain something, the result is often quite the opposite; when you merely think about how to do well in something, it will naturally come about.” (“Teaching the Fa at the Conference in New Zealand”)
Others would find the boss and ask for a raise, but as a cultivator, I follow the course of nature. My life was simple. I took my own lunch and never ate out. Others went out to eat, ordered expensive cosmetics online, and purchased new clothes left and right. When others played games online, I would memorize Hong Yin. My performance at work was outstanding, and this had a good effect in validating the Fa.
I helped co-workers whenever they had difficulties. I also clarified the truth to them. But most of them did not believe in gods or Buddhas, and they didn't care about anything if it didn't relate to their own benefits. I would start with topics they were interested in first, and that way they would listen. I learned to use yuan notes to clarify the truth. I wrote on them, “Falun Dafa Is Good” and “Do the three withdrawals to safeguard your future.” I wrote the phrases on notes worth one yuan to one hundred yuan. Initially I was afraid to use the cash, but gradually the fear subsided and I used them all.
e. Meeting a Qigong Practitioner
Our company did very well during the economic recession. The manager told me that just a fraction of what I had contributed would pay the salaries of the entire company. My boss commented that employees like me were very scarce and wished he had more like me. I told him that I practiced Dafa and abided by the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. When he heard that, he insisted on giving me a book. He was a qigong master in his country and knew Zhouyi and fortunetelling. I knew I should not accept it, because Master told us in Lecture Six of Zhuan Falun,
“When you make contact with them, if you can manage not to receive or take anything from them and just be a normal friend, it will not matter much. If those people really carry something, however, it will be very bad, and it is better not to make any contact with them.”
Since he was the boss, I had to consider his ability to accept Falun Gong when I clarified the truth to him. I took his book and wrote in it, “The Fa rectifies the universe, evil will be completely eliminated,” and returned it to him in two days. He had thought that I would accept it. When I refused his offer, he got mad. When I told him again that Dafa was good he jokingly warned me, “I will have the cops arrest you!” He no longer commended me on my accomplishments at work. He also instigated staff in the human resources department to harass me, and one day they asked me, “What have you done? Someone from the police station called and wants to investigate you.” I told him, “I did not commit any crime. I come to work every day, and you know well how hard I work. Give me the phone number and I will call the police station.” When I called the number, they said that I had a wrong number, and the incident was over.
The boss often bragged about how he sent out gong and cured certain staff, or how he made an employee sick if he didn't like him. He wanted to know my birth date to send his gong to me. Initially I paid no attention to him, as I thought he was just boasting, and he was nothing before a Dafa practitioner. I later realized that he was doing crooked, evil things, and he was persecuting people. I began sending forth righteous thoughts to eliminate his interference. After a while, he became ill and was hospitalized for two weeks. He returned to his country after he was discharged from the hospital, and we learned that he went to see his master. After he returned, he came to tell me that there were several people from the police department coming to investigate me to see if I practiced Dafa. He protected me and turned them away. He warned me not to ruin my future by practicing Dafa, and he hoped that I would work there long-term. I felt he had staged the entire event in order to scare me.
Mother suggested that I leave the company, but I felt it would be difficult to leave. I was a senior employee, all the staff knew me well, and my job was fairly easy. I was satisfied with it from many aspects. Could I find anything else like this in the future? From that point on, it seemed that the boss was always causing trouble for me, trying to destroy my future, and I started to resent him. I became short-tempered, lost weight, my complexion turned dark, and I could not stay focused when sending forth righteous thoughts. My mother advised me to give up my job, as we were cultivators and not here to fight with an ordinary qigong practitioner. Foreign investors, even though they knew the truth, would, in order to gain advantages, align with the Party and sell their consciences while exploiting Chinese citizens. Their last bit of hope for justice and freedom was gone. I thought I had left the evil party far behind. In reality, it was still around, so I quit the job.
4. Elevating Xinxing and Passing a Deadly Test
a. Fighting with My Mother
I spent more time with my Mother after I quit the job. Mother advised me to read the Fa more. But my mind was focused on looking for a job, as I was concerned about how I would live in the future. I was unable to send forth righteous thoughts around midnight, since I was too sleepy. My mother used to remind me, but I would still sleep through. I didn't do the exercises much, and when I did the standing exercise, I was exhausted. When I did the sitting meditation, I fell asleep. I watched foreign movies, ate snacks, and purchased things just because they were on sale, not because I necessarily needed them. No matter what I did, my mother criticized me, so I searched inward, but I could not find anything. I thought I had always been this way. I felt I was better than my classmates and my co-workers. They spent all day online playing games, went out to eat all the time, purchased the most expensive items, and socialized constantly. I felt that my mother could no longer understand me, and began to regret that I had quit my job. I resented her for persuading me to quit, and for teaching me Dafa. I felt it was all because I had learned Dafa that I’d become this way, and I began fighting with her.
One day I picked up Master's Fa and saw this,
“Cultivation is hard. It’s hard in that even when a terrible calamity strikes, even when evil madly persecutes, and even when your life is at stake, you still have to be able to steadfastly continue on your path of cultivation without letting anything in human society interfere with the steps you take on your path of cultivation.” (“Path” from Essentials for Further Advancement II)
I began crying uncontrollably as I was so deeply moved by this Fa. Over the last dozen years, Dafa practitioners have risked their lives, endured the misunderstanding of their families, and criticism from relatives and friends, defame and slander from the media, and the persecution, all because they were firm in their belief. Ancients showed us how they came forward for the truth. But look at me, I began to waver just for that bit of benefit.
Master also said, “Having heard the Dao in the morning, one can die in the evening.” (“Melt into the Fa” from Essentials for Further Advancement)
I obtained the Fa so easily and didn't know how to cherish it. I felt I’d truly let Master down. I recalled everything since the moment I’d obtained the Fa, and I thought I’d let go of many attachments, when in reality, I had not. I was still fearful of enduring hardship, feared an uncertain future, feared letting my family down, and feared losing face. I didn't let go the fundamental attachment to being human. I thought I was fairly diligent, but I was comparing myself with my classmates and colleagues. I was far from the Dafa standard.
b. True Cultivation
In order to catch up, I began doing the exercises and studying the Fa with my mother. We set our living standard to the lowest, so as long as we were not hungry that would do. In order to save transportation fees, we tried our best to walk everywhere to clarify the truth. When we had to stay out overnight, we went to a 24-hour store to purchase food and sat there all night. We used the money we saved to make truth clarifying materials. Those were the most memorable times, and I understood many things on the basis of the Fa, and found many of my shortcomings.
Master taught us in “Teaching the Fa at the Conference in Houston,”
“Just now I mainly said that when people are cultivating, bearing some hardships and suffering some pain are good things. Some people say, 'I cultivate in Falun Dafa. I should cultivate comfortably, I should be able to increase my gong without going through trials and tribulations, and there shouldn’t be that much bothering me.' If cultivators don’t pay back karma and don’t raise their realms, their gong will never grow. Some people say, 'my spouse won’t let me practice the exercises, not giving me the conditions or time [to practice], and he even threatens a divorce.' Actually it’s not necessarily for certain. Perhaps it’s testing to see how much importance you put on your cultivation. But the manifestations are indeed very intense. Cultivation is serious. Not one test or hardship will seem like a joke. When troubles emerge for cultivators, there are definitely reasons [behind them]. Actually, when anyone creates trouble for you, he or she is helping you to improve. As you improve your realm of thought, you are also eliminating karma as you endure pain. Then it is also testing whether or not you are steadfast towards this Law. If you aren’t steadfast towards the Law, then everything is simply out of the question.”
After I read this Fa, I no longer resented my former boss. If he had not created those tribulations, how could I let go of the desire to pursue a good future, enjoy life, and indulge in vanity. How could I overcome the deadly test?
Master said,
“If you can let go of fame, interest, and emotion, and yet you don’t consummate, in the end even I will feel that it’s unfair. For a human being, letting go of fame, interest, and emotion is the same as letting go of life itself. What do humans live for? Isn’t it just for money, fame, human emotions, and so on? If you can let go of them are you still human? (Applause) Humans live for those things; only gods are without them.” (“Teaching the Fa at the Conference in Houston”)
c. Eliminating the Evil Party’s Poisonous Culture
After reading the Nine Commentaries and articles about eliminating the Party culture, I realized that some of my thoughts and deeds still reflected that culture. Since young practitioners have been cut off from the traditional Chinese culture, eliminating Party culture within us can be quite painful. We always believe that we are right, and this is based on the Party culture's judging of right and wrong.
Master mentioned in “Fa Teaching at the 2007 New York Fa Conference,”
“When Chinese people look at things with the worldview instilled by the wicked Party, it is truly hard for them, having been 'reformed' in this manner, to tell right from wrong or good from evil in the human world, or for them to recognize the Fa or the Truth. Older folks and people of older generations were once educated and shaped by ancient human culture, [theirs being an era] prior to the appearance of the wicked CCP's culture. Although the wicked CCP's things came into existence in more recent times, those persons' moral baseline has remained intact to this day, and they can tell good from bad on a basic level. The most lamentable are modern youth, whose heads are completely infused with the modern ideas of the wicked CCP, and yet these persons think they are great and that they see through everything. They mistakenly think that the chaotic state of people's relationships, value systems, and ethical relations--itself the result of the CCP's having deliberately ruined those things--is how mankind has always been throughout history, and they think it's human instinct to act that way. In addition, there is the heretical theory of evolution, whereby they truly regard themselves as animals, ignorant of the fact that this has happened as a result of the CCP's deliberate actions. People have forgotten what mankind has been awaiting and the real purpose of being human, but the evil specter of the wicked Party does know these, and so it has been deliberately corrupting human beings. That worthless, modern type of ignorance is completely blocking them from recognizing the truth of the universe, and that is a terrifying prospect for this generation.”
Particularly Master lectured in Hong Yin III (“Drinking The Wolf's Brew”),
“The evil Party's culture
goes against Heaven's Way
Indoctrinated from birth,
you're 'reared by the Party-mother'
One should feel ashamed,
filled with those warped ideas
Life is not about being filial to the Party
Theft, deceit, lust, fighting ---
the communist thug
Don't sell out like the Fifty-cent Brigade
The secret agent's ugly acts
disgrace his countrymen
[If you still regard yourself
as the Party-mother's son,]
devils smile sinisterly
at your every thought and deed”
This Fa states even more clearly how insidious the evil Party culture is. I thought that Party culture only affected those most evil beings in China, but later I realized that none of the youth in China can escape the evil doctrines, and that we are all poisoned. That's why most children rebel against their parents' rules and regulations, and claim that it's because of the “age-gap.” Actually, this is a deviated notion. The conflict between young people and their parents is the clash of two cultures. We no longer have compassion, loyalty, etiquette, wisdom, or integrity, and in particular, we cannot tolerate criticism from anyone. People today are short-tempered, only concerned about themselves, and indulge in leisure. These deep-seated notions have been preventing me from elevating, and I realized it only after a dozen years of cultivation in Dafa.
5. Helping Master Rectify the Fa, Fulfilling My Vow
For a cultivator, the most important thing is cultivating oneself well and rectifying the Fa. One should not be attached to money, fame, or benefits. We have been waiting ages for this time and we are now at the final time. I still have a lot to do to catch up. When I saw that the Minghui website was soliciting articles, I knew that I had to write an experience sharing. I hope our young fellow practitioners will eliminate the Party culture's poison. I hope I will cultivate like when I first obtained the Fa, striding forward vigorously and diligently.
We want to save more sentient beings and clarify the truth for them every day. As Dafa practitioners we can let go of everything, but we also must first know the truth ourselves. When we made the vow and followed Master, when we fearlessly dove into the bitter sea, enduring endless reincarnations, we endured glory and enormous tribulations. Is there anything today that we cannot let go? Helping Master rectify the Fa and fulfilling our vows is our mission, our purpose in life, and our true nature. No matter what you did or did not do in the past, this is the final moment. As long as you believe in Master, believe in the Fa, and truly wake up, you are truly walking on the path of divinity.
Please kindly point out any shortcomings.
