(Minghui.org) In 1996, at the age of 16, I learned about Falun Dafa while on a trip. I learned 4 of the 5 exercises and read three chapters of Zhuan Falun. Unfortunately I didn’t read all chapters, but it was a step in the right direction.
In 2000, I started working and lived in a dorm. Every time I slept, day or night I had a nightmare. A terrifying face, all wrinkled appeared in front of me and I was afraid to fall asleep. During the nightmare, I was conscious but unable to move or get up and it was as if I was being pressed down. So, one of my relatives, a Dafa practitioner, advised me to practice Falun Dafa.
I formally started practicing Falun Dafa since then. That first night, I felt as if a person was sitting beside me, protecting me and I slept very well. I no longer experienced the nightmare. On the third night, I dreamed that I killed a fuzzy animal as small as a spider. Fellow practitioners told me that it was the origin of the interference.
I went to fellow practitioners’ home to study the Fa whenever I had time. After practicing for half a month, I witnessed the power of Falun Dafa. I attended my company's annual hiking event and didn’t feel tired. In previous years, after the hiking event I was still tired after resting for two hours. I had returned to good health. I was very surprised by the power displayed by Falun Dafa.
Cultivation Is Serious
Cultivation is serious. However, I didn’t understand the meaning of cultivation, and was not clear on the Fa principles. The problem was that I didn’t attend group study to communicate with other practitioners or understand the Fa, which resulted in detours on my cultivation path. Whenever I had the lust test in a dream, I didn’t do well. I regretted it a lot after I woke up and felt upset. I didn’t look at the fundamental problem that prevented me from following the Fa principles. I accepted my thought karma as my own thoughts, which told me that I could not cultivate and so I gave up. I lost my confidence and lowered my standard.
In 2003, I was married. My husband often worked out of town and our marriage life became very stressful. After becoming pregnant, I no longer read Falun Dafa books. My moral standard became lower and then I gave up cultivation. I became an everyday person with little tolerance. I became pregnant again, but had an abortion, which was a terrible sin. My marriage life turned sour, my life became stressful and my mind was filled with complaints. I also was unfaithful and we divorced in 2010.
I lived a sinful life with a man who was still married. He was actually the opposite from me and I lived in a bad relationship. After some time I realized that I had to let go of sentimentality and emotions.
I wanted to cultivate again, but because I had sinned, I couldn’t face Master. However, our merciful Master knew what was in my heart. He arranged for a fellow practitioner to help me. I was crying because Master hadn’t abandoned me. I must cultivate well and make up for all my mistakes.
It was difficult for me to return to the cultivation path because I had not left the man I lived with. Fellow practitioners helped me to strengthen my righteous thoughts. Before I left him I was beaten and berated and he told me if I didn't give up Falun Dafa he would kill me. I sent forth righteous thoughts and recited Master's poem:
“True Character is Revealed
Be resolute cultivating Dafa, the mind unstirred
Climbing in levels is what’s fundamental
Faced with tests, a person’s true character is revealed
May you Consummate—
a Buddha, Dao, or God” (Hong Yin Volume II, English Translation Version A)
I asked Master to save me. But then, I realized that it was a test for me to see whether I could let go the attachment of living and death. I thought, “It doesn’t matter if I die. I will follow Master.” I decided to never again give up practicing Falun Dafa. With the help of fellow practitioners I was able to move away from that sinful life.
I want to advise practitioners who are trapped in the attachment of emotion to let it go. You will certainly regret it if you don't.
Returning to the Falun Dafa Cultivation Path
It was not easy for me after leaving this sinful relationship and after having mistreated my child. Finally, after a dream, I contacted my former husband. He had missed us too and his life was filled with misery. I and my child moved back into our old home.
I returned to my cultivation path. We re-married, and I am trying to make up for the mistakes I made. We live in harmony and our child is feeling the positive effect of our normal lifestyle.
I must make more effort to catch up with fellow practitioners. I donated 10,000 yuan to the local material-making site. I try my best to do the three things daily and read all of Master's scriptures. When reading about desire and lust, I felt a lot of regret. But, then I realized that finding blame is useless. I needed to work harder. Since Master did not abandon me, I still have hope to be a diligent cultivator.
Starting a Material Production Site
I was touched by the good deeds done by fellow practitioners and needed to do my part for the Fa rectification. Master encouraged us to set up more material-making sites, so I decided to run one to lighten fellow practitioners' workload.
Master also asked us to spread information about the Shen Yun performances to mainstream society. Therefore, I distribute Shen Yun DVDs to private car owners. It worked out well. Also, when I passed by the night market, I thought that I should let more people know about Shen Yun. So I stopped and entered the market. I bought a bowl of noodles and talked to the customers at that booth. One lady said that she had watched Shen Yun and found it very good.
A man told me that he had watched Shen Yun and read Falun Dafa books. But, he didn’t go to the Minghui website. I gave him software that would bypass China's firewall. He said, “I read all the material published by Falun Dafa. They are very good. I believe that the world won’t exist without Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance.” I was moved by his words. He introduced another man to me, explaining that he also often reads and watches Falun Dafa related materials.
I gave everyone that had been there and had arrived in the meantime CDs about Falun Dafa. When I left, I could hear them discussing Falun Dafa and they all agreed that it is a good cultivation practice. Master's poem said it all:
“The Red Tide's End
The populace wakes, and there is justice
All the Three Withdrawals spell the Party’s end
With joint effort, the ancient civilization has begun anew.” (Hong Yin Vol. III)
Feeling Encouraged
I felt very encouraged. Master has done everything for us. It’s not that difficult to clarify the facts about Falun Dafa.
Once I gave a Shen Yun DVD to a man who turned out to be a policeman. I told him about Shen Yun. In return he asked whether I am a Falun Dafa practitioner. I didn’t answer. Then, after he asked for the third time, I thought there’s no need to deny such good Fa, and said yes. He asked, “Do you live nearby?” I nodded. He continued, “You have such a handsome son and you are doing this kind of thing.”
I told this man that Falun Dafa is innocent, that the Self-Immolation incident was a hoax and that Falun Dafa had spread to over 100 countries. I said that only the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) is persecuting Falun Dafa, that the practice saves people or I wouldn’t be here to take the risk to save you. The person beside him reminded me, “Please go. He could arrest you.” I was not afraid. I told him about the goodness of Falun Dafa and he listened. I was thinking that Master was there to help me to save people. He said, “The 18th National People’s Congress is about to occur. How dare you come out to talk about it now?” I smiled and held the thought that our aim is to save people. Before leaving he thanked me. No matter what happens, if we keep Master and righteous thoughts in mind, we will be safe. This was a test and encouragement.
Guiding Young Practitioners
It’s also my responsibility to guide a young practitioner. My son and I had already been left behind so much that we must catch up. My son understands the Fa well and he can listen to up to three chapters of the Fa daily. He can almost recite it. He changed a lot and all the teachers in school like him.
He collects telephone numbers and picks up business cards on the street. He gives them to me and says, “More people will be saved.” He helps me with the house chores so I have more time to study the Fa.
When my son was in first grade, we both knew that he would be forced to join the Young Pioneers. He said, “I will never join and, as I don’t want to be poisoned.” We prepared two plans. Under Plan A, my son would attend the ceremony, but would send forth righteous thoughts to clear the evil in other dimensions. Under plan B he would not attend school that day. He went with plan A. He told me that he didn't join, refused to sing and listen to the songs. He said, “I asked Master for help and sent forth righteous thoughts. Master covered my ears and I could only hear classmates talking, but no songs. I kept sending forth righteous thoughts.” The teacher sent him on two errands, so he missed the swearing in ceremony. His righteous thoughts were strong and Master helped him.
I am fortunate to return to Falun Dafa during this final period of the Fa-rectification. I am lucky and happy, but I also have the responsibility to cultivate diligently and save more people. I will not let Master down again. I will listen to Master, cultivate with a pure heart, do everything with compassion and pass every single test set by Master.
I hope we practitioners can encourage each other. Due to my low level, please kindly point out any shortcomings. Thanks to Master and all the practitioners who had helped me.