(Minghui.org) After reading the recent Minghui editorial titled “Spreading and Reading Fake Teachings Disrupts the Fa (with Comment from Master),” I was shocked that such a serious problem existed. Master’s warning comment was like a whack across my head and suddenly woke me up from the tribulation I had been mired in. (See http://en.minghui.org/html/articles/2013/4/28/139069.html for the editorial)
Though I never did any of Fa-disrupting things mentioned in the editorial, I realized that the warnings do not just target those spreading and reading fake teachings, but they also apply to anyone who still harbors a human mindset.
Our destiny to cultivate Dafa is worth the deepest appreciation from the bottom of our hearts. I hope we all cherish what Master gives us and never become a person who was once so fortunate to obtain the Fa yet carelessly let the cultivation opportunity slip by.
It is my understanding that the “human hearts” Master mentioned in the comments go beyond the heart that disrupts the Fa, and they also include any and all kinds of attachments we have.
So I do not exclude myself from the intended audience of the editorial. I personally feel that there are too many human attachments that may distract cultivators and make them forget about their cultivation, mission and responsibilities. Lust, showoff mentality, hatred, combative mentality and jealousy are just a few of those human hearts that can easily derail a cultivator.
Before the publication of the editorial, I had been riding along with my long-standing attachment to lust. Every day I mindlessly surfed online and looked at dirty pictures and videos. I knew it was wrong but just couldn’t control myself. My demon nature ran wild and my righteous thoughts were nowhere to be found.
When I read what Master wrote, “You are rather disappointing to me, unable to manage your human hearts” in the comments, I felt Master was talking about me.
Master also warned us, “Your human hearts, at any moment, could pull you down and cause you to lose the destiny to cultivate Dafa.”
At that moment, from the bottom of my heart I felt the seriousness of cultivation and the horror of losing the destiny to cultivate Dafa. Master’s warnings were like a whack on my head, and I began to reflect on what I had been doing all these days. I saw that I failed to break through the tribulation and my body was controlled by ugly and evil things.
I suddenly realized that I was in grave danger, with the old forces trying everything to trap me in the massive tribulation and to eventually destroy me.
After the shell-shock, I began to read Master’s comments over and over again until I was able to memorize every word. During this intensive Fa-study I felt Master’s compassion. Those factors that prevented me from staying rational and clearheaded melted away and I was no longer sleepy and distracted when I studied the Fa.
Then I began to think about why I still harbored so many human attachments after so many years of cultivating. When I measured myself against the Fa and looked within carefully, I found that I had forgotten what cultivation was all about.
Even though I had been cultivating and doing the three things on a regular basis, my cultivation was not solid at all and I mistook doing things for cultivation. Participating in Fa-validating activities sort of became a career to me. Everything I did appeared to be appropriate and well-done, yet I never paid any attention to ridding myself of my human attachments. I still longed for comfort in life and was in constant pursuit of hedonic enjoyment in the human world. I was content with myself as a cultivator since I did a lot of things and often found some excuse to slow down my pace.
I failed to cherish the preciousness of Dafa cultivation and I let down Master’s painstaking salvation. I allowed my attachment of lust to run wild and become worse and worse. I made the same mistake over and over again.
I had long forgotten the wonderful feeling I experienced at the beginning of my cultivation. Without a deep appreciation of this precious opportunity to cultivate and lacking a diligent attitude, I turned to so-called “wonderful feelings” in the human world to fill the void in my heart. I grew interested in all things human, including pornography. Now I came to see that interests in human things were substances to be removed with righteous thoughts. After all, those human hearts were all attachments.
No matter how many years one has been cultivating or how many things one had done to validate Dafa, failing to cultivate oneself solidly and letting down one’s guard may result in instant destruction of the cultivator. One single thought can make a huge difference.
I vow to break free from the grip of my human heart. I do not want to be destroyed by the evil before the Fa rectifies the human world, nor do I want to become a person who once cultivated in the Fa yet carelessly let the cultivation opportunity slip by.
Master’s comments awakened me and helped eliminate many evil factors that were persecuting me. It stopped me from walking to the edge of the deep cliff and gave me a second chance to redeem myself.
I know that I cannot live in despair and remain hopeless. It will only make things worse if I give up on myself. As long as the Fa-rectification is still going on, as long as I am still living in this world, there are still opportunities to better myself.
The destiny to cultivate Dafa is worth the deepest appreciation from the bottom of our hearts.