(Minghui.org) I'm a young, female practitioner. I will be 30 years old this year, and I first started practicing Falun Gong in early 2012.
Eliminating Fear
A week after I started cultivating, I began explaining the facts about Falun Gong to other people. At first I talked to them indirectly. I didn't understand why such a wonderful practice was misunderstood and badmouthed, and I naturally wanted to explain the real situation.
Reading Master's new articles further strengthened my resolve to clarify the truth and save sentient beings. A fellow practitioner later printed Dafa brochures for me, and I distributed them on my street.
Initially, my fear was strong. Before leaving home, I sent righteous thoughts. Even after I returned home, I was still afraid. There was a time when I felt like I was being watched by lots of eyes at home. I was also scared that friends or relatives whom I talked to would reveal that I practiced Falun Dafa. I was nervous and on edge.
When I realized that the state I was in wasn't right, I calmed down and started sending righteous thoughts to eliminate the source of my fear and the old forces. This helped me relax quickly, and I stopped worrying.
Afterward, when I talked with other practitioners, I found that they, too, were using the Fa to analyze and think about the situation. During such times, we became very strong. We did not allow the source of our fear to shake us, and we were able to disintegrate the influences in distant dimensions. Consequently, the things that wanted to persecute us couldn't.
Many of the worries were illusions. If I couldn't see through an illusion, I became uncertain, and hesitated. The Minghui website has many articles warning us about safety. I believe that we should observe safety precautions and be aware. However, the safest way is to strengthen our righteous thoughts.
Before cultivating, I cared a lot about protecting myself. After learning the Fa, I did things very carefully. I switched my cell phone off and removed the battery before talking to other practitioners outside the house, or else I wouldn't talk at all. When I played the exercise music at home, I placed my phone in another room, guarding against any “phone tappers” listening in on me. My paranoia even made me reluctant to give out my workplace name and my real name to practitioners whom I'd just met. This led to many misunderstandings and inconvenience.
I had actually trapped myself inside a circle built by my own fear and worries. Over time, I came to realize that these behaviors had become a burden. It was a long time before I realized that in an environment like China, we cannot be certain that what we do, from an everyday person's perspective, is 100 percent safe.
If we really have to live up to the standard of being perfectly safe, then we can't do anything. So, safety precautions are necessary, but they shouldn't become a burden, and we shouldn't go overboard. In other words, being conscientious about safety comes from being responsible and considerate of others. It's not driven by a hidden attachment to fear. Constantly maintaining righteous thoughts is a practitioner's greatest form of protection.
The articles on Minghui talk about some practitioners who clarify the truth openly. They put Dafa brochures on their desk at work so that colleagues can pick one up to read. It's not that they are careless about their safety, but rather it's that their righteous thoughts have reached a certain level, and it affects many things in their environment. Dispersing evil is the best guarantee of safety. This is completely different from being negligent or being irresponsible of the safety of fellow practitioners or oneself. You might be doing the same thing using the same method, but your thoughts at the time, objective, and degree of righteous thoughts, may bring about a totally different result. This is also decided by one's cultivation state.
After I understood these things, I constantly made a point of eliminating my fear. I now say words I wasn't brave enough to say before, and I talk to people I couldn't previously clarify the facts to. My level of effectiveness has also increased.
During the process, I made myself clarify the truth more calmly and rationally, and without panic. When I speak calmly, people trust me and what I have to say.
I believe that when clarifying the truth face-to-face, my attitude is just as important as what I'm saying, maybe even more important. Being honest and unafraid will quickly dispel any elements making the other person fearful. It will give them the courage to see the influence of communist propaganda.
Many people's confusion and misunderstandings are actually fake, and are influenced by their fear. However, they aren't aware of this. Who doesn't know that the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) is vile? Who doesn't know that the CCP can do all sorts of evil things? It's because the person feels that accepting these lies will keep them safe, so much so, that they would rather reject the truth.
If we want them to be brave and fearless, then we must first be brave and fearless ourselves. Having strong righteous thoughts will vanquish their fear. Let our approach and attitude lead them on their first step, showing them the light. Their righteous thoughts will then come forth, and they'll be willing to listen to the truth and make rational judgments.
Eliminating the Attachments Hiding Behind My Fear
Even though fear is an attachment, other attachments may be hiding behind it. I found that these attachments are the source of my fear. So “fear” is like a thread that led me to discover other hidden attachments.
I have a good job in a reputable company. When I first started handing out Dafa brochures, my biggest fear was losing my job. I thought, “If I worked at an unknown private enterprise, then I wouldn't be afraid of losing my job. If I did, I could find another one. I could also be like other practitioners, telling people about Falun Gong openly. I wouldn't have any concerns speaking to colleagues and my manager about the persecution.”
Following this train of thought, I recognized a selfish attachment. Searching deeper within, I discovered my hidden attachment of seeking fame. (Looking at it now, I realize it was something that stemmed from not having a solid foundation in cultivation.) I sent righteous thoughts to eliminate the attachment, and then felt more relaxed.
Another fear is one of getting caught and persecuted by the CCP. This is an attachment to life and death. In addition, I was afraid that something would happen to me, and it would be a blow to my parents. This is sentimentality. Of course, there are many other attachments. I realized that fearing something meant I was attached to it. Behind my fear were many attachments of different kinds and severity. When you feel fear, that is the best time to go searching for the attachments behind it.
The cultivation of a new practitioner is closely tied in with saving sentient beings. Cultivating oneself while saving sentient beings is the most glorious cultivation way Master gave us.
Fa rectification has reached the very end, and I still have many regrets that I hope to make up for. There are many more things I want to do while saving sentient beings. This journey has not been easy. Only by cultivating yourself can you give sentient beings the hope of being saved. For new practitioners, the time is even more pressing, but I'm going to use everything within my power to follow the road that Master set out for me. I hope I don't disappoint Master or sentient beings.
Category: Improving Oneself
