(Minghui.org) Greetings, revered Master! Greetings, fellow practitioners!
I have been practicing Falun Dafa for 18 years. One regret I have is that I only started to submit experience sharing articles to Fa conferences after moving to Sydney, Australia from China. Looking back at my path of cultivation during the past eight years in Sydney, I have mixed feelings about my progress.
It was such a bumpy road for me: I was frustrated that my first submission wasn't chosen. Then, I became elated that my submissions in the later years were used. However, just as I got used to anticipating that my articles would be chosen, I was at a loss again when it wasn't.
This process of submitting sharing articles truly reflects the process of my growth and maturity in every stage of cultivation: From being a contributor of articles to a member of the “experience sharing article team” that reviews and finalizes submissions to be read at conferences. It is a mission and honor I had not expected.
I still remember the struggle when I wrote my experience sharing article for last year’s Fa conference. It wasn’t easy for me to complete my writing because I had just overcome a xinxing tribulation that wasn’t small by my standard.
During the review process, my article “suffered” the responsible scrutiny of the assessment process; hearing the team’s overwhelming criticism of the article that I wrote with my whole heart, I was unable to suppress my impetuous feeling, “Forget about it. The article is mine. Let's simply skip it.”
Thus, I said impatiently to the group, “Nothing needs to be modified, I have gone over the article many times before finalizing it. If it is still not up to standard, just don’t use it.” I was quite satisfied with myself for what I said, relishing myself being “generous,” “able to let go,” “not attached to fame and gain,” “no show-off mentalities,” and so on.
At the successful conclusion of the Australia Experience Sharing Conference and the Epoch Times Experience Sharing Conference, however, I felt a tiny and quiet sense of loss, because no one seemed to have noticed my contribution.
This year’s article writing also began with the "I need to cooperate" mentality. When coordinators tried to mobilize practitioners to write sharing articles for the Fa conference, my first feeling was there was nothing to share, as I haven’t cultivated well enough.
So many attachments had not yet been removed; so many tasks not yet accomplished. My current cultivation state was not worth mentioning, let alone to share. Nonetheless, my sense of responsibility as a Dafa disciple finally overcame the many fears, including fear of remarks and criticism from fellow practitioners.
Deep down I knew that the Fahui was a form of our cultivation that Master requires of us and is to be left for the future. I regard myself as an intellectual; writing isn’t too difficult for me. Time also seemed manageable. Therefore, I had no reason not to cooperate and submit my sharing.
Master constantly takes care of every genuine practitioner. During sending righteous thoughts, I was able to see my human attachments, big and small, the removed and yet-to-be-removed ones.
Righteous thoughts from the Fa helped me overcome my discouraging human attachments from the stumbling experiences through a difficult year. Confidence in cultivation and gratitude to Master were inadvertently strengthened during the article writing process.
It was a process filled with tears and joy, and a process of being washed clean by the Fa. Without pursuit of being selected, I expelled selfish thoughts with my best efforts. I combed through every painful tribulation.
Passages from the Fa appeared in my mind. I reviewed them and quoted them carefully in my article. It was the first time that I didn’t have to search hard for quotes from the Fa to include in my article.
I wrote, “It wasn't my true self; my torments really stemmed from not severing my human attachments for a long time. Yet I didn't enlighten and even allowed them to discourage me in my cultivation.” I knew that it was Master helping me to elevate my wisdom through improved understanding of the Fa.
I felt a kind of lightness never experienced before when I finished writing the sharing. I knew a chunk of my huge attachment to self had been removed by Master. Those matters used to trouble me so badly for over a year, matters that I failed to find calmness and balance in my heart even through strengthened Fa study and 5:30 a.m. daily exercises. They now quietly vanished without a trace as I completed my experience sharing article.
I discovered that I no longer felt uneasy whenever I met those fellow practitioners or coordinators who had “harmed” me. On the contrary, I was deeply grateful because I understood that, without those experiences involving these people, I would have had no way of finding out how strong my attachments to self was.
On the surface, I was not attached to fame and gain. However, deep inside, I was so angry that I even harbored negativity and slacked off; I allowed the fighting mentality and jealousy that wasn't part of my true self to trouble me for too long.
After I upgraded my xinxing with Master's compassionate help, I realized that the answers had always been there. I was the one who needed to look within.
I was finally able to have a sincere and relaxed chat with a family member who I had always complained about, without intent to change her. I told her through writing the experience sharing paper, “I‘ve found my 'differentiating' heart, and it is an attachment that I should get rid of.”
Whenever I see shortcomings of fellow practitioners now, I am able to look within to see if I harbor similar attachments.
For example, when I saw others unable to keep up with early morning exercise every day like I did, I could also see the same lack of perseverance in myself in treating fellow practitioners with patience and trust.
When I saw practitioners' fear of participating in the sales team of our media, I could also see my own fear before making such a major commitment. When I saw pursuit of comfort preventing a family member from returning to Dafa cultivation, I could also see myself repeatedly delaying my plan to increase the second exercise by half an hour at night.
When I saw a practitioner's lack of seriousness during Fa study, thus unable to complete reading one chapter of Zhuan Falun, I also found myself doing less Fa study than I would have liked to, due to the same laziness, or inability to guarantee the quality of Fa study due to sleepiness.
Overall, after Master helped me to dissolve my attachment to self, I could now appreciate endurance and perseverance of other practitioners displayed during early-morning exercises and Fa study. And, to think that I once thought that they were not as resilient as me!
I once ran into the fellow practitioner who used to bring music to our morning practice site. She said she missed the time we practiced together in the morning. She often recalled that when we sat in meditation before the break of dawn, she often felt like she was sitting at the peak of a very tall mountain. That “out of this world” sensation was still so deep in her memory.
During this year's Shen Yun Performing Arts promotion, perhaps Master had seen my heart to take part in promoting Shen Yun, as he arranged a skilled fellow practitioner sales representative to be my partner. During the first several weeks we did our best in daily Fa study, practicing and sending righteous thoughts.
We started with one of the most prestigious streets of Sydney. As we entered each luxury shop, the fellow practitioner introduced Shen Yun to every staff member patiently. Despite the rejections we got, we entered the next shops unaffected.
We encouraged each other to maintain the purest heart for saving sentient beings. As a result, after several rejections, we got warmhearted support. The high-end fashion shops, shoe stores, bottle shops, cafes and restaurants gradually became the bridges between Shen Yun and the audience. We also learned from other fellow practitioners to make notes and input into a database each time businesses put up the posters, for our future reference.
I have not joined many Shen Yun promotions this year but I felt that when we cooperated closely with each other and trusted each other, we received help from the divine.
For example, one time we entered a cafe opposite the central train station. When the manager learned about the mission of Shen Yun and looked at the poster, we were surprised to see his positive energy.
He climbed to a high place to put up the poster for us. Afterwards, he climbed to the position again and again to make adjustments until the poster looked perfect.
He also showed us how to use the sticky tape more effectively. We happened to enter his second shop in the same area, and he contacted two friends who were shop owners in the district and helped us to put up the posters in their stores also.
Another example was that after we entered a highrise building which hosts more than 100 established financial and insurance companies, we worried whether there was enough space to put the posters in their shops.
These companies have neither kitchen nor staff rooms, and several shops already rejected us. We then entered the corporate management office without worrying too much, and briefly introduced Shen Yun. When the manager looked at the beautiful Shen Yun poster, she happily agreed to let us put the poster on the entrance glass door.
When we entered each of the three government buildings at the central train station, nearly everyone in the government offices who normally looked very serious, expressed warm affection after hearing our introduction and seeing the Shen Yun poster for this year’s show.
They not only warmly helped us, but some also took some tape and put up the posters in their cafeterias or employee lounges.
Of course, our cultivation status determines how firm our heart is for saving sentient beings. Furthermore, our attitude of promoting Shen Yun would depend on how well we could study the Fa, do the exercises, and send righteous thoughts on a daily basis.
As soon as we slacked off a bit, is when we could get into trouble. It may be that we would face interference to stop us from putting up Shen Yun posters during working hours or in key locations.
Master said:
“I have told you previously that whether or not a Dafa disciple cultivates well determines his power to save sentient beings as well as his ability to be successful in fully cooperating, here in the human world, with the Fa-rectification.” (20th Anniversary Fa Teaching)
Fellow practitioners, let us cherish one another because this is an opportunity that comes but just once. Let us remind each other to walk our path well, along the final leg of our journey.
Please kindly point out anything inappropriate.
Thank you Master! Thank you my fellow practitioners!
(Presented at the 2014 Australia Falun Dafa Cultivation Experience Sharing Conference)