(Minghui.org) I was very tired after coming home from group Fa study one day. I felt that my level of forbearance had reached its limit, and I no longer wanted to study Falun Dafa books with practitioners.
Lying in bed, I felt dizzy and could hardly move.
I wondered why I felt this way. I felt there was an almost tangible substance over my head. As soon as I realized it was thought karma, I wasn't as dizzy, but I was still weak.
When I saw my son playing around instead of studying, I felt exhausted, and I didn't feel like telling him to stop playing and to concentrate on his studies. I also thought that I had tried my best to help a practitioner, and I did not want to continue.
I looked inward and saw that behind the sense of exhaustion was a lack of determination. I realized this was a sign of feeling passive and powerless, and these feelings were preventing me from progressing forward in my cultivation.
I wanted to break through the passive state of mind and raise my cultivation level. Besides having faith in Master and Dafa, I had to elevate my xinxing level and my understanding of the Fa principles.
I knew I had to look inward further so that I could move forward.
The sense of exhaustion gradually disappeared, and my energy level increased. I had already read two chapters of Zhuan Falun that day, so I thought I should read Master's other lectures.
I finished reading a lecture that I had started reading before, and continued reading another lecture. The Fa principles were slowly revealed to me, and an image formed in my mind. I saw a gigantic boundless world. I wanted to step into that world, but was afraid.
When I searched inward to see why I was afraid, I realized that it was because I lacked strong will and forbearance! I realized I needed to be determined in order to continue on my cultivation path.
The next time I attended group Fa study, I felt like a child learning to walk. I staggered forward, under Master's compassionate guidance, toward a selfless and immeasurable field of compassion.
During the following days, my heart was open and calm, and my mind was clear. I felt I had numerous capabilities. New Fa principles were shown to me, and my righteous thoughts expanded. When I follow the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance and truly cultivate myself, infinite compassion and wisdom emerge.
I'd like to share the following words from Master to encourage everyone. Master said,
“Who can step out of it then? One can! Isn’t there Dafa, the universe’s Dafa that is spreading? Others have obtained it, why can’t you?! Others can cultivate well, why can’t you?! Isn’t this your personal problem?” (“Fa Teaching at the 2016 New York Fa Conference”)