(Minghui.org) I am 79 years old and have practiced Falun Gong for over 10 years. I recently experienced sickness karma and enlightened from this that one thought during a tribulation determines whether a practitioner moves forward or backwards in cultivation. I would like to share my experience.
I had some health issues recently. My teeth and stomach ached, I wasn't able to eat, and I couldn't sleep because my pancreas was in intense pain. Despite all this, I was not concerned or afraid. I told my husband, “Whatever happens, don't worry. I will be all right. Don't pressure me to go to hospital.”
Since I passed a sickness tribulation two years ago, I thought I would be able to easily get over it this time. I took the pain as a sign that my body was being cleansed. I would study the Fa, send righteous thoughts and clarify the truth as much as I could. A fellow practitioner who used to work in a hospital said, “Pancreatitis is very painful. Let me ask a few practitioners to send righteous thoughts for you.” I did not agree. Another practitioner asked me if I would visit a doctor. I asked, “What would he check for? Wouldn't he look for sickness?” The practitioner said, “You truly believe in Master and the Fa.” I said, “Yes.”
Master said,
“No matter what, have righteous thoughts and act righteously, and there will be no test that you cannot pass.” (Teaching the Fa in San Francisco, 2005)
I steadfastly believe in Master and the Fa. My heart was unmoved even when the pain reached the limit I could tolerate. One night, the pain became especially agonizing. My whole body began trembling as if it was going to explode. As soon as I had this thought: “I need to tell my family something.” I lost consciousness from the agony. I woke up a few seconds later and realized that thought was not righteous. I sent righteous thoughts to deny the old forces' arrangement.
As soon as I had that righteous thought, my pain stopped. I slept very soundly that night, and I woke up hungry the next day. My eating and sleeping returned to normal. Thanks to Master, I passed this test.
Because in cultivation nothing is coincidental, I looked inward to see where the problem was. I saw that I was afraid of suffering and had not cultivated diligently. I usually sweat and am in pain when I practice the first four sets of exercises. I'm also in pain when I do the sitting meditation. I thought I could take a shortcut by doing more to improve my xinxing instead of enduring the pain.
Sometimes, I became upset and wondered if I could only cultivate to a low level.
I watched a TV series one night about humans and aliens, even though it was the time I usually did the exercises. I knew I should practice the exercises but I continued watching. Suddenly, the TV screen turned black for a few seconds, and I realized that Master was giving me a hint to do the exercises. I wondered why I couldn't control myself.
I was determined to practice the exercises. Even when the sitting meditation became painful, I did not move and told myself, “This is how the karma is dissolved.” Gradually I was able to extend the time I meditated from thirty minutes to one hour. Now, I'm no longer in pain when I meditate. Practicing the exercises is not a burden for me anymore.
From this tribulation, I enlightened that one thought determines whether one moves forward or backward when facing a test.