(Minghui.org) In the past I had thought of learning the Fa by heart, but when I looked at the thickness of the book Zhuan Falun, I thought of my age and gave up. Earlier this year I was often distracted when reading the Fa. This is the Great Law of the Universe. Gods say it is a means to heaven. I decided I must memorize the book.
Indeed, in the process of memorizing the Fa, one eliminates attachments and makes progress in cultivation. Many human notions and habits I did not notice before came to my attention through memorizing the Fa.
Recognizing My Shortcomings Through Memorizing the Fa
While reading Master's lectures, if I came across teachings I thought I needed to pay attention to, I usually copied them into a book. After I began to memorize the Fa, I realized that I was treating Dafa like the theoretical writings of an ordinary person. I copied the teachings at will driven by human pursuits. Cultivation is a serious matter. I was showing disrespect for Master and the Fa.
I also had the habit of copying other practitioners' understandings of the Fa and treating them as references. This is an attachment. Last year I read a China Fahui article published on the Minghui website. I thought it was well written and read it several times. I even told other practitioners about it. This is actually a xinxing issue.
Master said,
“If you want to be a practitioner, it all depends on cultivating your heart and on you, yourself being enlightened since there are no role models.” (Zhuan Falun)
I was wrong in putting other practitioners on a pedestal. I should practice cultivation with a steady mind and reach consummation through my own understandings of the Fa.
Learning to Look at My Own Shortcomings Through Other Practitioners' Faults
I had a conflict with a practitioner at the Fa study group. Recently, this practitioner went through sickness karma and did not attend Fa study. I went to visit her accompanied by another practitioner. However, I was afraid of offending her and therefore did not point out the attachments I saw in her. I realized my attachment to being the “good person” when I got home and immediately told myself to eliminate it.
Later on I learned that this practitioner was admitted to the hospital. I thought of her shortcomings and was not surprised that she had this tribulation. I was instantly shocked by my thoughts and started to look within. I saw that I had a lot of negative thoughts towards this practitioner.
For instance, this practitioner did not pay attention to safety when using her cell phone. She often brought her phone along to Fa study. I reminded her about this a few times. I knew I was upset because of my fear. I also saw my weakness – looking at the faults of other practitioners instead of looking within.
The next time I went to Fa study, I was told that this practitioner had gone home from the hospital. Upon returning home, I asked myself why I wasn't happy to hear that. Why did I feel as if this has nothing to do with me? I realized it was my jealousy. Master talked about the issue of jealousy. I immediately told myself to get rid of this attachment.
When I next went to Fa study, I learned that this practitioner had gone to another hospital for treatment. I made arrangements with another practitioner to go and visit her. I bought some food and checked which room she was in. However, I was then told she had left the hospital and so I had to cancel plans to see her.
I was a little upset. I thought to myself, “Why did she have to leave the hospital again. I had bought food for her and it's now wasted.” I instantly realized that these were selfish thoughts. I was attached to showing others what a capable and considerate person I was. I quickly got rid of those bad thoughts.
Master said,
“To tell you the truth, the entire cultivation process for a practitioner is one of constantly giving up human attachments.” (Zhuan Falun)
Learning the Fa well is the key to reaching consummation in cultivation.
When I think about seeing this practitioner again at Fa study, I start to cry. We used to be co-workers and later on became fellow practitioners. Through Master's blessings, we managed to stay together in this final stage of Fa rectification. We must treasure this relationship and be diligent in cultivation.
Category: Improving Oneself
