(Minghui.org) I injured my back soon after I started practicing Falun Gong. I was not sure how to send forth righteous thoughts at the time, yet with my faith in Master and the Fa, I recovered within two weeks.
It was just beginner's luck however. After so many years of cultivating in Dafa, I have just recently come to realize what it means to eliminate the notion of being sick. When I found myself unaffected by physical pain, I found an elevated cultivation state.
I have had some sickness karma in the last year and at times could not continue clarifying the truth at a local tourist attraction. I studied the Fa, did the exercises, and sent righteous thoughts at home. I hoped my sickness karma would eventually go away.
Yet two months passed, and it became worse and worse, to the point that I could not walk. When a few practitioners came to study the Fa with me, they told me that many of my notions were not aligned with the Fa, and suggested that I study with a clearer mind. They also recommended listening to Minghui radio and reading experience sharing articles.
I took their suggestions. I soon found many of my attachments and enlightened to many more Fa principles.
In order to clarify the truth at this particular tourist attraction long-term, I moved back to my hometown three years ago after being gone for 40 years. My family and relatives welcomed me with open arms and showered me with love. I was soon able to clarify the truth to the tourists every day and do the three things.
It was not until I started having sickness karma that I realized I had been immersed in human sentiment and emotion during the past few years. I had developed attachments to comfort, zealotry, and showing off without realizing it.
The evil exploited this loophole and arranged for me to have sickness karma. I did not know how to look within, however, and thought that as long as I did the three things at home, my sickness karma would be gone.
My purpose of doing the three things was so that I could “recover” from the sickness karma. And this in fact was rooted the old forces and their arrangements.
Master said:
“When you encounter ordeals during your cultivation, you have got to cultivate yourself and look at yourself--that doesn't mean acknowledging the ordeals arranged by the old forces and trying to do well amidst the ordeals they've arranged, that's not the case. We negate even the very emergence of the old forces and everything that they've arranged; we don't even acknowledge their existence.” (“Teaching the Fa at the 2004 Chicago Conference” from Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. IV)
I strengthened my Fa study again after I became clear on this Fa principle and found this fundamental attachment. I aligned my every thought with the Fa and corrected myself right away. I denied every bad thought that I caught myself thinking.
I then stopped trying to figure out whether I was sick or not, knowing that it was all just an illusion. The condition soon disappeared and I no longer needed help.
Besides clarifying the truth in person at the tourist attraction, I also made truth-clarification calls using my cellphone. I studied the Fa with fellow practitioners online every evening but rarely shared cultivation experience with them. I found myself stuck at one level of cultivation, however, and no longer improving.
Thanks to Master’s arrangements, a fellow practitioner introduced me to the truth clarification call platform where I could also study the Fa, send righteous thoughts, clarify the truth, and share experiences with fellow practitioners. When I officially joined the team, I woke up the next morning feeling renewed.
One time, after making phone calls for a specific case, I suddenly had a bad headache, and the pain spread to my ears and down my neck. I could not even open my mouth wide enough to drink water.
Master said:
“But precisely because you do cultivate in Dafa, even though the pressure you face is great when the hardships come at you earlier than they would have, and the tests of your xinxing are tough to pass--and sometimes the tests may be huge--when all is said and done, those hardships are all things you need to overcome, they are accounts you need to settle, tabs that you need to pay. (Audience laughs) Aren't they great things, then? So whether it is good things or bad things you run into, so long as you cultivate in Dafa, they are all positive, to be sure.” (Teaching the Fa in San Francisco, 2005)
Every tribulation is an opportunity to improve. I knew I had to be responsible for the Fa, for sentient beings, and for myself. Even though I had to hold my head and cover my ear and neck, I still joined the team in sending righteous thoughts and studying the Fa. I also covered shifts in making phone calls.
I listened to Master's lectures continuously, and I listened to Dafa music when I lay down. I tried to assimilate myself to the Fa in everything I did. When I caught myself with bad thoughts, I immediately recited “Falun Dafa is good. Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good.” The headache and pain lasted for months, but I endured.
Once, when I was with a few practitioners studying a new lecture, my head, ears, and neck hurt so badly that I could barely breathe. My head felt swollen and painful, and my whole body was rocking.
I looked up to Master's photo, which seemed to be smiling at me, encouraging and telling me:
“When it’s difficult to endure, you can endure it. When it’s impossible to do, you can do it.” (“Lecture Nine” from Zhuan Falun)
With one thought in my mind, I felt as if I disappeared and light filled up my field. All the pain in my body was lifted at that moment and everything returned to normal.
In the past three months that I have been on the team, I’ve noticed the beneficial changes in my body and the improvement of my xinxing. I have improved so much all around. The practitioners around me are all part of my improvement.
I only just now came to understand what cultivation is. And now I’m clearer than I’ve ever been.