(Minghui.org) I began to practice Falun Dafa in the spring of 2016, at the age of 25. I feel so fortunate to be able to cultivate Dafa during the period of the Fa rectification.
I used to worry about many things. I worried if I would ever have a close friend and about my education and if I would be successful in my career. I was a good student and was popular at school, yet deep down I was not happy.
My mother began to read Falun Dafa books just before I took the college entrance exam. She encouraged me to read them as well. However, I was already deeply influenced by the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and was concerned that my mother was on a deviant path. I didn't listen to her and we ended up arguing.
I left home a short time later to go to college in another city, and only returned during school breaks. When I was at home I noticed my mother's attitude had improved a lot, and she was no longer bad-tempered.
I would call her whenever I had a problem, and we would talk it through. She was always calm and kind and helped me solve every problem I had. My mom became the good friend I'd always wanted.
When I was at home my mother continued to encourage me to read Dafa books. Deceived by the state-run media propaganda of the “self-immolation” hoax on Tiananmen Square, I asked her whether she would want to burn herself.
“That's not possible,” she replied. “We practitioners are all good people. Check out the book yourself, and you will understand.”
So I did some research and learned that the CCP was full of lies and deceit. I knew that my mom was nothing like the propaganda portrayed on TV. But still, I was scared of the CCP and wouldn't read the Dafa books.
After I graduated from college I was hoping to be admitted to a prestigious graduate program. However, it didn't happen and I was devastated. I was depressed when I went home on vacation.
One day, my mom placed a copy of Zhuan Falun in front of me. “This book can solve all your problems,” she said. “Whenever you called me with a problem, you always thought that what I said made sense, but I was basically referring to the principles that I learned from this book. Wouldn't it be better if you checked it out yourself?”
This time I picked up the book. The more I read it, the more my heart felt lighter. I was at peace deep down. That night I slept soundly, and have done so ever since.
After I finished reading Zhuan Falun, I had more confidence. I knew that this was what I wanted. I couldn't help but wonder why the CCP launched the persecution. I wanted to get to the bottom of it.
I asked my mom many questions and she patiently answered them all. She showed me some truth-clarification DVDs, such as how the “self-immolation” incident was staged, the April 25 peaceful appeal to the Central government, and other events. I was moved to tears. These practitioners were so upright that their faces were full of compassion and perseverance. Whoever persecutes them must be evil.
I realized that Dafa taught people to be good. There was nothing wrong with practicing Falun Dafa, and I made up my mind to be part of it.
I did not yet have an in-depth understanding of the Fa, nor did I understand a practitioner's mission. I did things out of a sense of justice so that people could know the truth. Whenever I had a chance I would talk to my friends about Falun Dafa, and watch the DVDs with my roommates exposing the CCP's lies behind the persecution.
At college, I did the sitting meditation and read the Fa on my bed every night. I conducted myself according to the standards of a practitioner. Even when it wasn't my turn to clean the dormitory, for example, I would still take care of it. I got along well with all my roommates after I began practicing.
Before I graduated, the school invited qualified students to hand in applications to be nominated as a superior graduate. I believed that the application process could be time-consuming and didn't want to show off, so I ignored it. Unexpectedly, I received an application from my instructor, who asked me to fill it in and send it back to her.
It took no effort for me to get nominated as a superior graduate. Had this happened before I began practicing Falun Dafa, I would have been so attached to the outcome that I would have spent lots of time on the application.
The first job I applied for after graduation was as a flight attendant for an international airline. I wanted the opportunity to go overseas and earn a good income. The interviews went well, but then I was held back during the political background check, which is done by the local police.
My mother had filed a criminal complaint against Jiang Zemin, the former head of the CCP, for initiating the persecution of Falun Dafa. Our local police were aware of this and thus did not want me to pass the background check, so I decided to go and reason with them.
With help from fellow practitioners, we went to the police station to talk to the officers there and the chief. The chief listened to me, but still would not let me pass the check. I had a strong attachment to getting this job, so I decided to fly to the airline headquarters and talk to them.
I told most people I met about Dafa on the journey there; from the passengers next to me on my flight to the cab drivers at the airport, and other people staying in the same hotel as me. Most of them became supportive of Dafa and quit the CCP and its affiliated organizations.
The next day, I went to see a woman who worked in Human Resources at the airline headquarters. I explained my situation to her, and she told me about one of her relatives who also practices Falun Dafa.
But she couldn't do anything to help. She assured me that as a good person I would find a great job elsewhere. I smiled and said, “What is important is that you know the truth. I will be fine. Thank you.”
I felt wronged for not getting my dream job, but I wanted to show her the demeanor of a true practitioner.
It was also a trial for me to let go of my attachments to fame and self-interest.
After I returned home, I couldn't calm down enough to read Zhuan Falun. I had put in so much effort to get this job and couldn't help but feel sad.
My cultivation state was not good, and I ended up losing my temper with my mom. On top of that, my father also complained and argued with her.
A voice echoed in my mind: “Don't read those books, don't bother to cultivate anymore!” I just ignored it.
Through sharing with other practitioners and studying the Fa attentively, I finally passed this test.
Master said,
“What we lose is actually something bad. What is it? It is karma, and it goes hand in hand with different human attachments. For example, everyday people have all kinds of bad thoughts. For self-interest, they commit various wrong deeds and will acquire this black substance, karma. This directly involves our own minds. In order to eliminate this negative thing, you must first change your mind.” (Zhuan Falun)
After I completely let go of my attachment I was able to think clearly, and knew exactly which job I should do. I suddenly realized that the flight attendant position was not a good fit for me, as I suffered from air sickness. How could I have been so attached to wanting this job before?
By following the course of nature, I found my current job, a perfect fit.
When I am not busy with work I go out with my mother and other practitioners to talk to people about Falun Dafa. I was a little shy at first but quickly adjusted my state. Every time I go out to clarify the facts I feel my cultivation improving.
I used to only think about myself and my own enjoyment, but my life was not satisfying and I needed to find something interesting to make my life fuller.
A strong habit of mine was watching TV dramas. Sometimes I stayed up all night watching them.
After I began practicing Falun Dafa I let go of these kinds of habits bit by bit.
The plot in the TV dramas is like ordinary people competing and fighting for fame, self-interest, and sentimentality. Some of their behavior displays very questionable morals. As practitioners, we have to keep purifying ourselves, so how could I still be interested in the ordinary world?
Another habit I had was singing pop songs. I realized that as soon as I began to sing, the melody kept echoing in my mind, and it interfered with me and my cultivation.
I thought seriously about this: No matter whether it's the lyric itself or the feeling I had while singing, wasn't it a manifestation of sentimentality? In addition, when I sang, I would often record it and share it with my friends. Wasn't this showing off? When I was sharing a song, my mind would also think about who would listen.
If I didn't pay enough attention, I could be dragged down by my attachments. Cultivation is no trivial matter. I must rectify myself in every thought and action to make sure it complies with a practitioner's standard. I must eliminate attachments from the root.
Due to my limited level, please kindly point out anything inappropriate.