(Minghui.org) One practitioner visited me the other day and shared how she dealt with the conflicts between her and her adult children, who were not always respectful to her. At first she couldn't help but criticize them quietly in her mind. But once she reminded herself to behave like a practitioner, she was clear on what to do and able to handle the situations well.
After hearing this, another practitioner said, “Young people these days have many problems. You should not spoil them and criticizing them is not wrong.” These words surprised me. When thinking about it further, however, I realized a big problem on the part of me and some other practitioners—that is, how to cultivate ourselves and avoid trying to help other practitioners in the wrong way.
When the persecution first started in July 1999, one local practitioner wrote statements against Dafa and Master Li, founder of Falun Dafa, against his will. Due to his ego and showing-off mentality, he did not submit a Solemn Declaration to nullify his earlier statements as genuine Dafa practitioners should do.
I knew that was inappropriate, but I did not point it out directly. Instead, when he ran into conflicts with other practitioners, I sometimes told those practitioners not to take him too seriously. “I think you should just treat him as a non-practitioner,” I said. In hindsight, I knew that I had been wrong, since what I did not was not consistent with the Fa and could actually impede that practitioner’s cultivation.
Here is why. First of all, the conflicts between us practitioners are for us to look inward and improve xinxing. When I was just showing sympathy to practitioners in conflicts, I probably had blocked them from looking within and elevating their xinxing. Of course, if such practitioners were very diligent, they might not have been affected; but if their righteous thoughts were not strong enough, they might have agreed with what I said and failed their xinxing tests.
Secondly, through studying the Fa, I have come to understand that the tribulations we encounter are related to our xinxing levels. If one fails the xinxing test, it could be hard to pass it next time. If other practitioners failed one xinxing test because of my “sympathy,” they may fail many more xinxing tests. As this continues, they may even give up cultivation altogether. If so, isn’t it my “help” destroying other practitioners?
Thirdly, as a practitioner, I should look inward whenever seeing conflicts between others. If I just make comments on the conflicts without looking at myself, wouldn’t I miss the opportunity to cultivate myself and cause difficulty for my cultivation down the road? As the loopholes keep piling up, I may not be able to pass my own tests. If so, what I did was both harming other practitioners and hurting myself.
Thinking this way, I am truly grateful for the opportunity that helps me realize this problem. Thank you, Master.
I've also noticed a similar phenomenon when some practitioners are stuck in tribulations. Other practitioners would show sympathy and offer consolation, often with human notions. For someone who is very clear on the Fa principles, the impact could be minimal. But since that practitioner is already in tribulation, and others are offering “advice” in the name of experience-sharing, the consequences can be very serious.
As a practitioner, whether we're the ones in tribulation or those who witness the tribulations, we should look within and truly improve ourselves. If we follow other practitioners’ notions or our own attachments, aren’t we creating loopholes for the old forces to creep in and cause harm? If so, the consequences can be devastating.
As practitioners, there is only one way for us to cultivate well and truly help others—that is, solidly following the Fa to improve ourselves and let go of attachments. We must cherish these opportunities and be clear on this.