(Minghui.org) One day after group Fa-study I overheard some practitioners criticizing me behind my back. They used harsh language. I was hurt, and became so angry that I felt myself shaking. Another practitioner stopped me from confronting them.
I went home, and became more upset. I could not understand why they were so cruel, I did not think I had provoked them. I was planning to visit each one at their homes and settle this.
Still upset, I cried, and played over the scene in my mind. Why were they so critical of me. I wanted to go question them the next day, but then I realized the following day was Master’s birthday. I decided to go the day after tomorrow.
Suddenly Master’s Fa came to my mind,
“ But normally when a problem arises, if it does not irritate a person psychologically, it does not count or is useless and cannot make him or her improve. Accordingly, his mind cannot get over it and is still bothered by it. It could be that his mind is hooked on it. He always wants to turn around to look at the faces of those two people. Upon looking back, he sees the two wicked-looking faces in a heated conversation. He can no longer take it and becomes very upset. He may even pick a fight with them right away. ” (Lecture Four, Zhuan Falun)
“No matter what it is you have encountered as you've gone about validating the Fa, it is all, I will tell you, a good thing--and that's especially so in these years of persecution--for those things have come about specifically because you do cultivation.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2008 New York Conference”, Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. VIII)
I calmed down and knew that I needed to look within. I found many attachments and human notions, such as not being able to tolerate criticism, the pursuit of fame, showing off, going to extremes, retaliation, not cultivating speech, and more.
I realized that in the past I did not cultivate my speech well. I drew conclusions based on my human notions. I isolated others and hurt their feelings. What I was encountering now was an opportunity to rectify myself and improve my xinxing. After I realized this, I was able to eliminate my anger toward the other practitioners. I told Master Li (the founder) that I was wrong, and I was sorry. My mind became clear and pure.
Thank you Master for helping me find my attachments. Thank you fellow practitioners for helping me improve.
Category: Improving Oneself