(Minghui.org) An article on the Minghui website mentioned that a practitioner couple had an intense argument over using green onion in cooking. I could not understand why they had a conflict over such a small issue and why they could not take a step back.
Then, I encountered a similar problem. I suddenly became very sensitive to the smell of green onion. Even the slightest scent of green onion was unbearable—so bad that I sometimes vomited.
Through this incident, I realized that I had a habit of pointing out other practitioners’ problems instead of putting myself in their shoes and using their issue as a mirror for my own cultivation. In fact, the true situation that caused the conflict may not be what it looks like. As practitioners, when we see problems in others, we should not criticize them. Instead, we should use it as an opportunity to improve in our own cultivation. We will be able to improve quickly if we remember this.
Several years ago, another practitioner was in the midst of a severe tribulation. Our local coordinator asked me to help him. I did not ask for large-scale help in our area. Instead, I arranged for several fellow practitioners who lived close to him to study the Fa and send forth righteous thoughts with him in the daytime. In the evening, I went to study the Fa, send forth righteous thoughts, and share my understandings with him. I felt this arrangement was appropriate because there would be practitioners to help him every day while not getting too many practitioners involved. The results were very good, and his state improved.
However, our local coordinator thought my arrangement would not work. She said more practitioners should go and help him around the clock.
I disagreed. In my understanding, the key for that practitioner to overcome the tribulation was whether he could look within, rectify himself and treat the problem with righteous thoughts. It did not matter how many practitioners went there and stayed with him. If the practitioners who helped him could not treat his tribulation with righteous thoughts, then the more people involved, the more interference they might bring him. Also, it would affect other projects if too many practitioners dropped everything to go and help him.
When the coordinator saw that I disagreed with her approach, she asked several practitioners from other regions to go and stay with him.
As a result, many practitioners from other areas came and helped this fellow practitioner. However, most of them only came because they did not want to refuse the coordinator’s request. When they saw the practitioner’s status and found out his attachment, they had different opinions regarding his problem and even debated it during group study. In the end, the fellow practitioner did not break through the tribulation.
When I looked inward afterward, I saw my problems. First, I did not communicate calmly when the coordinator disagreed with me. When she asked several practitioners from other areas to help, I had resentment and became negative.
The most important lesson was that I didn’t realize the fellow practitioner's tribulation provided me with a mirror to see my own shortcomings. On the path of cultivation, nothing is accidental. I should have realized there must be something for me to look within and improve upon. For example, the fellow practitioner in tribulation had an attachment to lust. I realized I also had an attachment to lust. I should have used his issue as my mirror, found my attachment, and eliminated it.
Another time, a practitioner couple asked me to help with their family conflict. They blamed each other, and both thought the other person was wrong. I told them I did not want to get involved in their dispute. I said, “We are all practitioners, so we cannot measure things with ordinary people’s standards. It makes no sense to argue about who is right or who is wrong. Even if you are a hundred percent right, and even if I think you’re right, you should look at the root cause and improve your xinxing. In cultivation, we do not meet the requirements as cultivators as long as our hearts are moved in conflicts.”
I shared with them what Master said,
“Cultivation is about cultivating one’s self. No matter what kind of state emerges, you need to take a hard look at yourself. I can tell you, if an ordinary person is able to look at himself whenever he encounters problems, he will become what ordinary people call a sage. When a Dafa disciple has a hard time with something and needs to think things over, he should look for things starting with himself and do things in line with the environment needed by Dafa disciples and the Fa-rectification. When a problem occurs, it is because that person is stubbornly going against the Fa principles. Go and find where the problem lies, let go of that stubbornness, and sort things out. When you encounter something, the best approach is not to charge forward and contend with others, push your way to the front, and rush forward to chase down the solution. Let go of your attachment, take a step back, and then resolve it. (Applause) If whenever something happens you instantly jump into who’s right, whose problem it is, and how you have done, then while on the surface it looks like you are resolving the conflict or tension, in reality that’s not the case at all. On the surface it looks plenty rational, but in reality that’s not rational at all. You haven’t taken a step back and fully cast off your attachment, and then thought the issue over. Only after a person calmly and peacefully withdraws from a conflict and then looks at it can he truly resolve it.” (“Teaching the Fa at the Fa Conference at the U.S. Capital,” Collected Fa Teachings, Vol. VII)
I told them about my experience during a family conflict. When I had a dispute with my husband, he said, “Look at yourself!” I was very angry hearing this. Then, I remembered that I was a practitioner. Wasn't our dispute an opportunity for me to improve? Just with this thought, I felt a warm energy flow through my body. The feeling of anger immediately disappeared.
The practitioner couple soon realized their problems, and the conflict was resolved. I also understood that I was not there to help them solve their problems—I was there to find my own problem through their behavior. I realized their conflict was very similar to the one I had at home. I did not see it until I saw their issue.
Once, a fellow practitioner told me he had a problem with his eyesight and could not see the words in Zhuan Falun. When I asked if he could see me, he said yes. I said, “There are layers upon layers Buddhas, Taos and Gods behind every word in Zhuan Falun. Every word has Dafa’s power. As long as you can see me, you can see the words in Zhuan Falun. Just believe you can see. As long as you believe you can see the words in Zhuan Falun, you will be able to see them.” He said, “Yes, I believe in the Fa. I believe I’ll be able to read again.”
When I visited him several days later, he said happily, “I can see all the words in Zhuan Falun again.” From this experience, I had a deeper understanding of Master’s Fa. I realized that the extent to which we believe in the Fa is the extent to which Dafa’s power will manifest for us. It's just as Master said,
“However strong the righteous thoughts are, that’s how great the power is.” (“Also in a Few Words,” Essentials for Further Advancement II)