(Minghui.org) In the early stage of my cultivation, I didn’t have a clear understanding of the relationship between our cultivation and cleansing ourselves of the Communist Party culture.
I used to think that if I avoided using party culture jargon, I would be staying away from the Party culture. Recently, I have been listening to the podcasts of Disintegrating Communist Party Culture and other programs, and only then did I really realize the influence of the party culture on me.
In Dafa cultivation, we cultivate our own primary spirits, which means we have to be aware of what we are thinking and doing. If we cannot distinguish what the party culture is, it would be difficult for us to think outside of its frame or understand things with righteous thoughts.
In particular, people born after the 1970s grew up in the Party culture. The ubiquitous Party culture has created a material field in people’s lives, and it is constantly swaying the minds of practitioners if they don’t pay attention.
Understanding what is Party culture and its manifestation, as well as dismantling its material field, is very important. Only then can we avoid being controlled by it and evaluate things rationally from the perspective of the Fa.
Here are a few lessons I’ve learned in doing away with the Party culture.
I once met fellow practitioner Xiaoya. She is very efficient in getting things done and can memorize the Fa very well. Seeing that she was so capable, I unknowingly followed her. I began to pursue the speed of doing things, not focusing on quality. I wanted to finish things quickly and enjoy the feeling of completing the task at hand.
On the surface, it looked like I did a lot of things, but deep down I was driven by the mentality of competitiveness, showing off, and jealousy. I was not aware of those attachments at the time and still thought that I was working hard to awaken people.
Gradually I brought this mentality into my Fa study, my life, and my work. I pursued speed in Fa study. If I memorized a lot of Fa, I considered myself to have cultivated well. I did things with an impatient, unsettled mind. No matter what I did, I wanted to finish it quickly so I could study the Fa. But when it was time to study the Fa, my mind went everywhere. Even though I was reading, I could not recall what I read afterward. I noticed my vision and hearing have been declining.
Looking back, it was the Party culture that harmed me. I blindly admired fellow practitioners and muddled through things to pursue quick success. I never thought that Xiaoya’s competence was because she studied the Fa well and her xinxing improved.
I was only copying her behavior, but without searching within to find inadequacies in my xinxing. I only thought about how to get things done with skill and speed, not realizing that quality and quantity came from solid cultivation. One has to calm one’s mind to study the Fa. Only then can one obtain Fa, improve xinxing and elevate.
One morning, my alarm clock awakened my spouse, and he asked if it was my alarm. I said no without thinking. I regretted it immediately and was surprised how could I lie so casually. Why did I do that?
Later, I realized that it was the material field of lying that played a role in my space. Because I had a selfish thought to defend myself, the substance of lying thus manipulated me at that time.
Now I am beginning to pay attention to this regard and let my main consciousness take charge.
Because I just copied others’ behavior, I learned the Fa but did not really comprehend the Fa. I developed sickness karma. My vision and hearing were affected. The runny nose lasted three years on and off. I also had dizziness, leg fatigue, back pain, frequent urination, and constipation.
I began having doubts about Dafa and wondered why I felt so miserable for so long. How could a cultivator have so many “problems”? I was doing the three things diligently, so why was I still in such a state?
Later I began to search within and asked myself questions. When I did the exercises, did my movements meet the requirements? When I meditated and felt the pain, did I uncross my legs? Did my mind calm down while studying the Fa?
Once I realized my problem, I was determined to change. I tied up my legs when I meditated, and no matter how painful it felt, I would do one hour of meditation. After one week, my leg fatigue and back pain were gone!
I slowed down while studying the Fa. I no longer pursued speed and quantity. I finally felt I was immersed in the Fa. The surroundings seemed to disappear. I felt my entire body, every organ, and each cell assimilating into the Fa. I was able to understand the deeper meanings of the Fa. Gradually, my vision and hearing recovered, and my mind became more clear.
I realized that I had the struggling mentality of the Party culture and I use the “doubting everything” way of thinking to judge things. I did not understand the Fa on the basis of the Fa and even had doubts about Master Li (Falun Dafa’s founder).
The sickness karma was precisely the stepping stone to a higher level and it’s the process of body purification. It served as a good reminder to examine my own cultivation.
I had an attachment to fear and suspicion for a long time. I often wondered what should I do if the police knocked on my door. When the doorbell rang, I feared it’d be the police. When I could not access the Minghui website, I wondered if the evil blocked the internet, or if someone was monitoring me online. When someone asked for my contact information, I often questioned what was their purpose. One friend asked me, “Why are you always suspecting that someone is going to hurt you? Are you paranoid?” I was taken aback by her remarks. I realized that I had a strong attachment to fear and suspicion.
After listening to Dismantling Party culture, I understood that the Party culture instilled in us since childhood has caused us to develop a habitual wary mindset: that no one can be trusted, and that this mentality of mine was especially reinforced by the persecution of Falun Dafa.
I was guarded at all times. When I came across people, I became wary of them and assumed that they had bad intentions. It is not a normal human way of thinking to always be on guard against others. It can easily lead to jealousy and resentment. Party culture also manifests in other ways, such as: not being able to see others’ goodness and always picking on them; feeling uneasy and jealous when others did better than me; resenting being asked to do things except from my supervisor.
I knew that those were human sentiments that needed to be cultivated away, but I had a hard time completely eliminating them. I realized I need to trace them back to the source to eliminate and get rid of them—the Party culture.
My husband didn’t know how to take care of his health. He refused to see a doctor when becoming ill, and he was not living a healthy lifestyle. I blamed him for not being filial, as his body was given by his parents and he should cherish it. He replied: “Why do you like to lecture others?” I immediately knew that I was wrong, as I wanted him to be like me. I did not care to understand what he thought or how he felt. Instead, I just blamed him. In fact, this was the Party culture at work.
The ancients dealt with the faults of others in a very different way. At the end of the Northern Wei Dynasty, Fang Jingbo, the governor of East Qinghe County, had a subject in his district who was sued by his mother for being unfilial. After Fang’s mother found out, she asked the unfilial man and his mother to visit the government residential area, where she had the man observe how Fang served meals to his mother. After many days, the unfilial man learned his lesson and was determined to change. From that point on, he became the most famous filial son around.
The ancient sages treated other people’s faults with guidance and taught them by example so that the at-fault person could understand that their behavior was against the moral code and learn how to correct their mistakes from the heart.
Poisoned by the Party culture, we bluntly accuse others and attempt to make them obey us. This not only fails to change them but makes them resent us. If we do not pay attention, we might carry out our truth clarification in the same manner.
As cultivators, we have to be very clear about the Party culture and eliminate it. This way we can truly think things on the basis of the Fa and do a better job of clarifying the truth and saving people.
This is my understanding at my level. Please kindly point out anything inappropriate.
Editor’s note: This article only represents the author’s current understanding meant for sharing among practitioners so that we can “Compare with one another in study, in cultivation.” (“Solid Cultivation,” Hong Yin)