(Minghui.org) When I recall my 24 years of cultivation, my eyes become wet with tears. It’s like a long movie, and the story is endless. This is because I have witnessed Master’s greatness and compassion, as well as Dafa’s power and its miracles.
I was born in the late 1950s. My father was a small businessman. After his assets were seized by the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) under the guise of a public-private partnership, he was appointed to manage a few small shops. He was upstanding and honest and never greedy. Although he never misappropriated anything, he was sentenced to forced labor for embezzlement. He did hard physical labor for a long time and was admitted to a hospital in Tianjin City after he became seriously ill.
My father was hospitalized in 1959 and discharged in 1960. That was during the three-year famine caused by the CCP’s man-made disaster, and many people died of starvation. There were nine people in our family, young to old, and no one except my father could work and earn money to support our family. But my father had to pay the hospital so that he could recover, and my mother had to travel more than 50 kilometers roundtrip between our home and the hospital to take care of him. The suffering and misery I witnessed were unimaginable.
I was a little over a year old at the time and had just started to walk. But I got hurt and felt I was paralyzed because I was hungry and cold, and no one took care of me. Because of that, my legs hurt ever since I can remember, and the frostbite scars on my feet bear witness to that time. I was sick and miserable from the time I was a child.
The situation was even worse after I got married. My family’s indifference and the torment of illness became more serious. When I was in my 30s, I began to suffer from many ailments, including cervical spondylitis, cerebral spasm, leg pain, headaches, near blindness, chronic nephritis, angina pectoris, and so on. I had many other health issues that I cannot name. My annual medical expenses were more than 10,000 yuan, but my ailments only worsened.
One night, I knelt in my courtyard, looked up at the sky, and said, “God! Buddha! Where are you? Can you save me? Why is my life so hard?”
I tried to commit suicide several times but always failed. I finally bought many sleeping pills and hid them in the closet, waiting for the opportunity to use them. Only after I started to practice Falun Dafa did I realize that Master had been protecting me and making me wait for the Fa.
Just when I was in the deepest despair, my eldest brother gave me that precious book Zhuan Falun, the main book of Falun Dafa. He told me that Zhuan Falun was great and could improve my health. I accepted the book because I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, thinking to myself that I was now almost blind—how could I read such a thick book? What a joke. I also didn’t believe that I could recover from my illnesses, so I put Zhuan Falun aside. But after some days, I thought, “I am going to die anyway, and my brother will be disappointed after my death if he finds out I did not read Zhuan Falun. I should take a look at it.”
During that time, I couldn’t sit still, so I just laid down all day. I held the book less than an inch away from my face while laying on the bed. I could hardly make out the words. It was as if I was in a trance, and after a while, I had a severe headache. I waited a while and then read again, but I couldn’t read even one sentence, and I couldn’t understand what I did read. I suddenly sat up with gritted teeth, thinking I had to read to see what Zhuan Falun was about. Then, I could read four to five lines. I took a break and read some more. The more I read it, the more I loved it. I felt good and I thought that Zhuan Falun was great. I forgot the pain and forgot to eat. I was impressed by what I now realized to be simple and easy-to-understand language, a truth that penetrated my heart, and the solutions to my various problems.
As I write this, I am crying again from happiness and joy. I recall the relief that I had never felt before. I had been searching all my life for something, and I had finally found it. Words cannot convey how I felt.
On the third day I was reading Zhuan Falun, I seemed to come down with a bad cold. I felt unwell and hurt all over. I thought to myself, “How could I catch a cold when I never left my room? Is this what my brother told me about Master treating my illnesses?” I told myself, “Coughs and colds can’t kill me, and even if they do, I’ll accept it.” I recovered in only a day.
I read Zhuan Falun every day, albeit very slowly. I recovered from all my sickness symptoms after reading Zhuan Falun for less than two months. I only learned later during my Fa study that I was acting in line with the Fa principles.
Master said: ...getting things naturally without trying to get them.” (Lecture Given at the Conference in Sydney)
I miraculously regained my health. I learned that life is precious and suicide is sinful, so I got rid of my sleeping pills and enjoyed the happiest and most joyful time in my life.
Before I practiced Falun Gong (also called Falun Dafa), when I was about six months pregnant with my daughter, my sister-in-law locked my door, yelled at me, and slapped my face over a trivial matter. I was so angry that I almost drank poison (dichlorvos) to commit suicide. If my husband hadn’t come back then, my daughter and I would have died together. The hatred I felt for my sister-in-law was immense.
Master said: “...cultivators have no enemies” (“Turning the Wheel Towards the Human World,” The Essentials of Diligent Progress III)
Master asks us to have no enemies. So, I went to my sister-in-law’s with my copy of Zhuan Falun and told them “You should read it. This book is so good. After reading it, you will stop fighting, and your family will get along. Who doesn’t want that?” They were both moved and started to cultivate. Two or three months later the persecution began, and they stopped practicing out of fear.
One night a few months ago when I was making truth-clarification materials, I heard my husband talking on the phone in the living room. After a while, he rushed in with his phone, his face was pale with anger. He put the phone on speaker so I could hear how badly his nephew was abusing him. I was calm, but I was afraid that he would not be able to take the abuse, so I consoled him and asked him what was going on.
It turned out that the younger generation in his family thought that the family’s gravesite was too low-lying, and they wanted everyone in the family to contribute some money to have the site raised. My husband’s nephew had called him to discuss it and asked him to contribute 1,000 yuan. But my husband said he didn’t want to contribute. I could hear in the bedroom that his tone was not nice.
In response, his nephew got mad and started to complain about him, saying that my husband never took care of his mother after she was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Because my husband was in the army at that time, my husband’s brother (his nephew’s father) took care of her. His nephew scolded my husband in a very nasty way. My husband was only 19 when his mother died. Listening to his nephew, I put myself in his shoes and thought how difficult it must have been for my husband’s brother and sister-in-law to go through those hard times.
My husband was shaking with anger at what his nephew said. I told him gently, “Don’t be angry. I agree it’s not right for him to speak to you like that. But think about it: Isn’t what he said true? If you could stand in his shoes, you might handle it differently. He wouldn’t have spoken to you like that if you had talked to him in a nice way.” As we were talking, his nephew’s voice messages came every two or three seconds. I was afraid that my husband couldn’t take it and would hurt himself, so I got ready and went to our in-laws’ place to see his nephew.
It was already after eight p.m. His nephew’s house was about 10 kilometers away. I rode my electric bicycle, thinking, “I want to save him, only Dafa can save him.” He used to drink too much and usually poured the liquor into an empty mineral water bottle he would carry in his pocket. He drank it as if it were water, usually several bottles of alcohol a day. He would berate anyone, even his mother. He would drink until his hands and legs shook, and his eyes bulged. He had poor eyesight, and his life was in danger. His wife divorced him and left.
When I got to his place, he was in bed pretending to be asleep so he could ignore me. I leaned over and asked, “How are you? Are you feeling better?” He opened his eyes, seemed embarrassed, and said, “Sorry, I drank too much.” I said, “What you said on the phone was right, but you shouldn’t be yelling and cursing. No matter how bad he is, he is your uncle. I talk to you like I do to my son. How can a son speak to his father like that?” He talked about other family matters and said that his mother’s parents were better than my parents, and so on.
I sincerely complimented his grandparents on how good they were. I tried to understand him from his point of view but also pointed out his outrageous behavior. He was moved and said, “You are so sincere, just as if you were my mother. I am touched!” I encouraged him, “You should cheer up!” He told me that he wanted to practice Falun Dafa. I told him to take it seriously, and he was very firm in his request.
After he started to cultivate, his mother also resumed the practice, and his father (the “old man”) became more diligent in cultivation. It didn’t take long for the skinny old man to become radiant and healthy again.
I realized that Master didn’t want to leave any single Dafa disciple behind and arranged the opportunity for his parents to return to cultivation.
I’d like to share some of the amazing things my relatives on my parents’ side have experienced. My elder sister started to practice Falun Dafa in 2003 after seeing how greatly my health improved. Only two months later, she recovered from her illnesses, grew new black hair on her almost bald scalp, and stopped having leg pains and stomach problems. Her family was grateful to Master and Dafa!
My second sister-in-law was diagnosed with high cholesterol, high blood sugar, and high blood pressure. She was hospitalized but didn’t improve. She was discharged and given a large package of medications. I told her to practice Falun Dafa. They all knew how much my health improved after I started practicing Falun Dafa. They also knew I was now very kind and sincere to everyone. My sister-in-law decided to practice Dafa. Soon after, she recovered from her ailment and threw away all the medications. Now in her 70s, she still cooks for her family, takes care of the household chores, and manages some affairs in the factory.
Seeing my improved health, my father once practiced Falun Gong, but he got scared and stopped after the CCP began the persecution. He also asked my mother to stop after seeing that I was repeatedly persecuted.
In 2004 I noticed that very few local practitioners were making Falun Dafa materials, but the demand was high. The practitioners who made the materials were very busy, so I wanted to share some of their load. They needed time to study the Fa and do the exercises. Practitioners taught me the techniques and helped me buy equipment and consumables. I started my material production site as a housewife who didn’t even know how to use a mouse. I have endured for 17 years despite tremendous pressure, all relying on the power of Dafa and Master’s protection.
My eyes recovered, but I still had to squint and get closer to see the small characters on the laptop, which worried the practitioner who taught me. At first, the more anxious she became, the more nervous I was, and the less I could see, which worried the practitioner even more. I thought to myself, “I can’t expect too much of her. I should be considerate, look inside, and be calm and unmoved. I should just watch how she does it and remember the steps.” She explained the steps as she operated the computer, and I took notes about each step. After she left, I followed the steps on the laptop from memory and referred to the notes I had taken. I soon got started and could produce Dafa materials.
I set up the material production site at home without discussing it with my husband, because I knew it would be absolutely impossible for him to agree if I told him about it first. I wanted to use my wisdom to have him accept it because I knew what I was doing was the most righteous and sacred thing.
My husband was unhappy when he saw the printer and computer. I said calmly, “I make the materials for my own use, so I don’t need to ask others for them, which is safer.” He didn’t say anything when he heard it was safer. Later, more practitioners wanted the materials, so I made more.
A practitioner delivered 20 boxes of printing paper with 10 packs in a box. The boxes were very heavy. He unloaded the car, put the boxes inside the main door of my building, and left quickly—also for the sake of safety. I quickly closed the main door and moved the boxes upstairs by myself to my apartment. My husband gritted his teeth and stared at me angrily. My son looked at me with an unhappy expression, too.
I took it as a great opportunity to improve, because they were helping me cultivate my xinxing. I was calm and tried not to be moved. I thought that was what I should do. I shouldn’t have any negative thoughts toward them. After I moved a few boxes, I felt that my arms and legs were weak. But I had to move the rest of the boxes quickly before anyone saw them. I went upstairs, reciting poems written by Master:
“Great enlightened beings fear no hardshipTheir will is cast of diamondLife or death, they have no attachmentForthright and broad-minded on the road of Fa-rectification.”(“Righteous Thought, Righteous Action” in Hong Yin Vol. II, Translation Version B)
After a while, my husband and my son came to help. They said, “You don’t have to do it, we’ll take care of the rest.” I was happy for them and realized what a treasure the Fa is—it’s great to follow Master.
In my cultivation, in particular when I face tests, I know how much my family has to endure, so I try to do everything by myself. Meanwhile, they have given me a lot of support and help along the way. I think they are also fulfilling their missions, and I’m glad to see they have put themselves in a good position.
I was an unattractive person who couldn’t even express herself well. After more than 20 years of cultivation, I have changed. I am calm and consider the needs of others first. I was the youngest in the family and never gave my opinion, so I didn’t know how to express myself. But now everyone talks to me about everything, they respect me and trust me. Dafa has given me wisdom.
I know that I still have a lot of attachments and need to seize the time to practice diligently. I want to try to leave as few regrets as possible, because there are still many things that I had wanted to do well but didn’t, and there are many people who should be saved, but they have not yet been saved.
I’m deeply grateful for Master’s protection, his compassionate enlightenment, and the opening of my wisdom, which have taken me out of danger despite severe persecution time and time again. Every step of my improvement is because of Master’s hard work and suffering for me. I don’t like to cry, but every time I think of how great Master is, I can’t help shedding tears.
Fellow practitioners, let’s work together to improve ourselves and save more people!