(Minghui.org) At the beginning of July 1999, I lay in a hospital bed and read through Zhuan Falun once. Then the evil Jiang Zemin, former leader of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP), initiated the persecution of Falun Dafa (also called Falun Gong). Facing this sudden change, I was at a loss. All the TV stations, from the central to the local stations, were slandering Dafa and Dafa practitioners. I stopped watching television.
At that time, my older brother was an assistant for the Fa-study group for Falun Dafa practitioners in his village. Right from the beginning of the persecution, he was constantly harassed and had his home ransacked by the police and village security people. I witnessed him hiding and leaving home to avoid persecution. My mother and I were worried about him. We often shed tears and had to hold up our spirits in front of others. His firm belief in Master and Falun Dafa and his intentional protection of Dafa books influenced me, such that I could firmly defend Dafa and persist in cultivating in Dafa.
Pressures and tribulations from various areas followed, such as from family, work, and society. At that time, I hadn’t even learned the five exercises. I only practiced the sitting meditation and studied the Fa when I had time. Under the evil’s control, not only did my husband try to hinder my cultivation, but he also no longer covered up the fact that he had an affair with another woman. In the workplace, I was not eligible for promotion because I practiced Falun Dafa. The indifference and alienation of relatives, friends, and colleagues, who viewed me as having the plague, made me feel hurt and depressed.
My husband’s verbal abuse and beatings made me dare not enter the home for a time. Whenever I heard his footsteps, I felt anxious. By destroying my Falun Gong books and cursing Master Li (the founder of Falun Dafa), my husband committed great sins against Falun Gong out of ignorance.
At that time, I was eager for a place to study the Fa and practice the exercises, but due to the overwhelming rumors, defamation, and arrest of practitioners, Dafa practitioners did not dare contact each other. I knew that my mother kept a copy of Zhuan Falun. One day after finishing my night shift, I rode for more than three miles to my mother’s home. However, her endless nagging made it impossible for me to study the Fa at her home.
I heard that a relative practiced Dafa and that she had the video of Master’s recorded Fa-teaching lectures and the book The Great Way of Spiritual Perfection. One weekend, I drove to this relative’s home and wanted her to teach me the exercises. She turned me away every time I went, refused to let me in, and said to me: “What’s wrong with you? The practice is prohibited now. Why do you want to learn it?!”
She went back into her house, and then came out with a packet of materials which she stuffed into my arms. She went back into her house and closed the door behind her. I thought she had given me Master’s lectures or exercise books, so I rode home in a hurry. After I opened the package, I saw it was only a packet of truth-clarification materials about Falun Dafa. I distributed the materials to local residents overnight. But I was not reconciled. On my next day off, I went back to this relative’s home again, and got the same result. I didn’t delay distributing the materials she gave me. For about a year or so, I just distributed the materials, and I had not been able to study the Fa with peace of mind, nor had I learned the exercises.
I live in the workplace residential building, go to work during the day, and usually distribute the truth-clarification materials at night. To avoid being seen by the building security people, I often climbed out windows and over courtyard walls. Later, my husband found out and reported me to the police. The director of the city police department, and the head of the 610 Office came to my workplace and arrested me. They interrogated me, but I avoided answering their questions by talking about other things. They had no choice but to let me go home.
My husband became angry because he didn’t achieve his goal. As soon as I returned home from work, he would choke my neck with his hands. The workplace leaders also refused to let me do my previous job, saying they were afraid of making trouble for themselves.
During that period, my life was absolute misery. I feared being persecuted, and I couldn’t eat or sleep well. I had to work every day doing heavy labor. I became thinner and thinner; my hair turned half white; and my teeth began to fall out. I felt that I might collapse at any time. I awakened suddenly one day and realized that the evil wanted to use this method to get me out of the Fa and discredit Dafa.
One day I finally ran into my older brother at his home. He had been away from his home for a long time. He found me an exercise audio cassette and asked me to go home and listen to Master’s instructions and the exercise music to practice the exercises by myself. He also read me Master’s poems:
“A Great Enlightened One fears no hardshipHaving forged an adamantine willFree of attachment to living or dyingHe walks the path of Fa-rectificationconfident and poised” (“Righteous Thoughts and Righteous Actions” in Hong Yin II, translation version A)
“In life, nothing sought,In death, regretting naught;Washing away all wrong thought,Buddhahood, with lessadversity, is wrought.” (“Nothing Kept” in Hong Yin, translation version A)
I had a determination: Isn’t it just death?! Instantly my whole body was shaken, and I felt I was very tall. I properly arranged my clothes, went back to my workplace, and happily devoted myself to work and life, and to being a true Dafa practitioner.
One day, I suddenly found that I had recovered from the illness that tortured me for a long time. I had it since I gave birth to my child. Moreover, I was now physically stronger. I bought a computer, a photocopier, and a printer. My elder brother and I made truth-clarification materials and distributed them.
Since then, my older brother’s righteous thoughts have also become stronger and stronger. Under Master’s protection, he escaped danger time and time again. After publication of the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party, he clarified the truth and persuaded people to do the three withdrawals – to quit the CCP, Youth League, or Young Pioneers – wherever he went. He told me later that he had talked to all the relatives in my family, his relatives, and his classmates. Yet only three of the people he spoke to did not do the three withdrawals. In our village, there are more than 200 households. He visited every family, delivered truth-clarification materials to them, and asked them to do the three withdrawals. From this, 70 percent of the villagers understood the truth and withdrew their memberships in the CCP and its youth organizations.
In 2011, I went to my son’s home to take care of my grandson, and quickly joined a local Fa-study group. Only then could I really calm down and study the Fa. I was excited beyond words. Unexpectedly, due to interference from my human notions and the evil, the Fa-study place was changed again and again. The participating practitioners and the effects of our Fa-study were greatly affected. I lived in my son’s home and was very restricted in my studying the Fa and practicing the exercises. Thus, I decided to rent an apartment by myself, so we could have a fixed location for our Fa-study group.
Within a week, there was an apartment next to my son’s building for lease. I rented it at the lowest price. What’s more unexpected was that when my husband and my son learned about it, they both supported me. Of course, that was Master’s arrangement. Thank you, Master!
Master said:
““Your most important task is to create for our students a stable cultivation environment that’s free of disturbances. This is your greatest responsibility.” The same goes for those of you present here: Your greatest responsibility is to ensure that your assistance centers and practice sites are free of disturbances and to lead others in cultivation.” (“Teachings at the Conference of Changchun Assistants”)
I realized that our Fa-study site was as important as the assistance centers were before the persecution was launched. To ensure that practitioners have an environment to calmly study the Fa and communicate with peace of mind, I kept Master’s teaching in mind. Over the past eight years, I have withstood repeated requests for tenants to register at the police station and consequential threats of fines. I turned away the neighborhood committee officials, the building manager’s visit, and prevented irrational practitioners from interfering. There was only one thought on my mind: I will never cooperate with any interference!
In October 2015, due to participating in suing Jiang Zemin for his initiating the persecution, the local police called me and ordered me to come to the police station. I did not cooperate. They called my husband and threatened to arrest me at my son’s home. Facing my frustrated husband and my angry daughter-in-law who threatened to divorce my son, I was not moved. After comforting them, I studied the Fa with other practitioners while looking inward. I found my attachments of revenge, zealotry, and selfishness or fear of being left behind by other practitioners. I sent forth strong righteous thoughts: “To completely dismantle all the black-handed rotten ghosts, communist spirits, and the CCP’s elements who used the lawsuit against Jiang to persecute me and my family; and comprehensively eliminate the evil lives and factors that manipulated the police, procuratorate, and courts. I am Master Li Hongzhi’s disciple and will never cooperate with any order, demand, and instruction of the CCP! If I am here, the Fa-study group is here.” I settled on this thought and sent forth righteous thoughts for an hour.
With Master’s protection and fellow practitioners’ help and encouragement, my son and I responded to the phone call from the police station in a righteous manner and successfully passed this test. So far, the police and neighborhood committee officials have not harassed me again.
Through a lot of Fa study and exchanging thoughts with other practitioners, I have seen a big gap between myself and other practitioners. I understood the reason why Master arranged for me to come here and get in touch with these practitioners. I must cherish this cultivation environment. I regarded every group Fa-study as an opportunity to purify our bodies and minds and improve ourselves together. Thus, I viewed it as extremely sacred and solemn. Fellow practitioners insisted on studying the Fa on time, regardless of the weather, or regardless of how busy and tired they were. I kept in mind Master’s Fa teaching: “...in the course of all this, just by being problem-free you have dealt the evil its greatest blow.” (“Fa Teaching Given at the Fa Conference Marking the Tenth Anniversary of Minghui’s Founding”)
Although practitioners came from different provinces and cities, we maintained our devotion and respect to Master and Dafa, and tried to read the Fa carefully. In our exchanges after studying the Fa, we only discussed and exchanged thoughts on how to improve our xinxing, how to cooperate with each other to do various projects that needed to be done, the issues encountered in clarifying the truth, how to rescue and help practitioners being directly persecuted, etc. We did this to ensure that we achieved the goal of studying the Fa collectively without being disturbed by the mundane aspects of society.
With the continuous improvement of my xinxing, I realized that Dafa cultivation focuses on the human mind. Master wants us to look inward and cultivate ourselves when conflicts occur, and wants us to become selfless. Dafa practitioners in the Fa-rectification period shoulder the mission of helping Master to rectify the Fa and save sentient beings, so we must have the courage to do so. I started from what I thought, said, and did, and corrected my thoughts, words and deeds. I considered in advance whether what I planned to do would discredit Dafa, and whether it would affect the saving of sentient beings. I put aside my resentment, jealousy, fighting mentality, suspicion, and so on towards other practitioners and my husband. I tried to understand them from their perspective. I realized that I should really thank people who treated me differently in the process of cultivation. Regardless of whether they opposed, supported, or understood me, they helped me improve my xinxing.
In the eight years of wind and rain, some practitioners came and left for their own reasons, but my family’s Fa-study group has persisted without interference. We know that it is Master who protects us to allow us to persevere in cultivation of Dafa!
Looking back on my cultivation of more than 20 years, I have paid too little, and Master has given me too much. It is Master who safeguards my moving forward step by step. Thank you, Master for your protection! Thank you, Master for your compassion! I will cultivate my mind and eliminate attachments in the remaining course of cultivation, increase the intensity and pace of saving sentient beings, and fulfill my historical mission and vows.
I bow to Master! Heshi!