(Minghui.org) I am a young practitioner who began to practice Falun Dafa in the spring of 2020. I’d like to express my gratitude to compassionate Master and thank him for giving me many opportunities to improve in cultivation during my very short time as a cultivator.
I have many attachments that need to be removed, such as seeking comfort, showing-off, lust, jealousy, and fear. Even when I found myself wasting time surfing the Internet, it was hard to stop doing it.
I subconsciously developed a desire and curiosity for something new. It didn’t matter if it was reports on the Epoch Times, on NTDTV, or other sources operated by Dafa practitioners, I still indulged in reading more than I should and wasted valuable time that I should spend on doing the three thingsi
Master said,
“Because of practicing cultivation among everyday people, a lot of our practitioners cannot release many of their attachments. Many attachments have already become second nature, and these people themselves cannot detect them.” (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun)
My human notions prevented me from detecting the attachments I needed to get rid of. The only way to find them was by studying the Fa in tranquility. Recently, I have been in a good state while studying the Fa and have maintained righteous thoughts well, so I have enlightened to some of the Fa principles.
When I was doing the sitting meditation one time, I entered into the state of tranquility. Suddenly, a powerful thought came to mind: “I am lonely. I want people to appreciate me; I don’t want to be defeated.”
This thought broke my tranquil state. How could such a thought suddenly pop up? I never thought I had a fighting mentality, because I believed that everyone was good in his or her own way and all should be respected. I always believed that this was being sympathetic and compassionate to others. However, this mentality itself is a human notion, which was to protect myself and prevent me from being involved in competition. Coupled with a strong attachment to saving face and a desire to be accepted and appreciated, I put myself above others, which in itself is a real fighting mentality. There was no compassion at all. In other words, there was a strong fighting mentality hidden behind my “compassionate” thoughts.
Master said,
“Because one is lost among everyday people, one will often develop in one’s mind thoughts for fame, benefits, lust, anger, etc. Gradually, these thoughts become the powerful thought karma. Since everything in other dimensions has life, karma is also the same. When one begins to practice cultivation in a righteous way, one must eliminate one’s karma. Eliminating karma means having karma wiped out and transformed.” (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun)
I couldn’t help but laugh when I realized that I had this strong fighting mentality. At the same time, I felt relaxed as if some bad substances had been removed. Master said: “Since everything in other dimensions has life, karma is also the same.” (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun)
I now have a deeper understanding of this Fa principle. When I entered tranquility again, the strong negative thought “I am lonely...” appeared again. I knew the thought was not from me, so I eliminated it.
I found Falun Dafa online last year and decided to start practicing it. Since none of my family and friends knew anything about Dafa, I had to tell them what Dafa cultivation is. At first, my motivation was to protect myself, to ensure that I had a good cultivation environment. But, gradually, my motives changed, and I knew I should help Master to save those sentient beings who were waiting for the truth.
In this process of telling them the truth about Dafa, I encountered different xinxing tests. Sometimes, I didn’t behave like a cultivator. I was aggressive and domineering, and that often led to undesirable outcomes. That happened because I didn’t have enough righteous thoughts and my wisdom was lacking.
I kept dwelling on those negative interactions, and I couldn’t calm down even while I was doing the exercises. It was difficult for me to break through this state.
Master said:
“The same goes for how the world’s people view our Dafa. If someone says that it’s not good and you debate with him in everyday people’s ways, or you try to silence him or the like, that will worsen the disagreement. We should just conduct ourselves well and handle everything with compassion. You don’t need to argue or debate with them. People have a side of them that’s aware, and they’ll be moved on the human surface too. They’ll naturally say that you’re good.” (“Teaching and Explaining the Fa at the Metropolitan New York Fa Conference”)
As a cultivator, I must remember that my surroundings will change according to my cultivation state. Only when I cultivate myself well can I do better in what I should do.
A few weeks ago, my parents asked me if I had been vaccinated. I calmly told them, “I’m a cultivator and don’t need to be vaccinated.” They seemed a little lost at what to say and replied, “Yes, yes. We understand.”
I felt uneasy for a while after that conversation, thinking that I might have come across as arrogant and invincible.
Master said:
“There was a person who was walking on the street with my book in his hand, yelling, “I have Teacher Li’s protection, so I’m not afraid of being hit by a car.”” (Lecture Three, Zhuan Falun)
I realized I had a strong attachment to self, not the compassion and kindness of a Dafa practitioner. My parents have recently been urging me to get vaccinated. Their tone was more serious than before. This time, I remained calm and peaceful.
After listening to them, I realized that they were worried because they knew the vaccine was only a temporary measure and there was a risk of severe side effects. Just saying, “I’m a cultivator and don’t need to be vaccinated,” wouldn’t calm their fears nor explain what the COVID-19 virus is and why it is here.
As cultivators, we should understand one point, that is, the purpose of the virus is to eliminate the CCP’s members and its supporters. For those who want to protect themselves from the virus, what they really need to do is to distinguish right from wrong and clearly distance themselves from the Party. I should use this reasoning to alleviate their fears and doubts about the virus.
Based on their ability to understand, I told them, “You should first know why such a virus originated in China, just like SARS. At a minimum, the CCP is responsible for the vast spread of the virus, because they concealed the initial information for nearly six weeks. Is this a natural disaster or a man-made one? In ancient China people talked about harmony between heaven, earth, and mankind.” I asked them if they knew what happened in China throughout the CCP’s 70-year rule. My parents listened attentively.
I told them about the Party’s infamous history and the persecution of Falun Dafa. I asked if they knew why Falun Dafa wasn’t immediately wiped out like other groups under the Party’s previous political movements but spread throughout the world. I explained why the virus was aimed at the Party and other things.
Finally, I told them to recite the auspicious phrases, “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good” to stay safe. They asked if that was being superstitious, but they didn’t refuse to do it. I smiled and said, “China is a truly mysterious and magical country.”
They said, “From what you said, Falun Dafa seems to be the center of the world.”
Looking back on our conversation, I didn’t try to convince my parents, I just had a pleasant talk with them. I believe that if I continue to cultivate myself well and behave more compassionately, I will be able to help them more.
I found it easier to clarify the truth in a relaxed state after that, overcoming my past aggressiveness. What I needed to better clarify the truth was not to become skillful at explaining but to improve my xinxing.
Now when I feel anxious or restless, I close my eyes and calm down. Then I sense something like light in my mind. I truly feel that Master has reshaped my life from its roots. Master has not only saved me but also given me such a sacred mission. Although I am still an immature practitioner, I will continue to follow Master all the way until I reach consummation.