(Minghui.org) In the past, one had to become a monk or nun, and live in a temple to cultivate. However, Falun Dafa cultivation does not require one to live like this, as cultivation is done in ordinary society. In such an environment, everything we encounter is not accidental, as there are attachments cultivators need to eliminate. If we want to seize all opportunities to cultivate ourselves, we must study the Fa well, regard ourselves as practitioners, consider others first at all times, immediately recognize thoughts of selfishness and egotism, and reject them.
Ever since I started cultivating in Falun Dafa, I have made sure to clear my mind when studying the Fa. Every time I finished Fa study, I would feel an indescribable beauty and extraordinary feeling in my heart. When enlightening to the Fa’s principles at different levels, I would always say to myself in a very gratified way: Studying the Fa is really good!
From the very beginning of the persecution, I realized that we must explain to the world what Falun Gong (also called Falun Dafa) is in order to validate Dafa, and expose the lies. At that time, I talked to anyone I met. However, recently I found that something was not quite right with me. When I went out to clarify the truth about Dafa face-to-face, I mostly talked to the elderly, and was afraid of talking to young people and those in the middle class. Master told us not to pick and choose. I wanted to break through this barrier, but it was hard. It seemed that there was an invisible force blocking me.
I was studying the Fa one time, and suddenly felt an urgency to save people. After finishing Fa study, I went out to clarify the truth. When I saw people whom I previously avoided, I wanted to talk to them, but I couldn’t open my mouth. After returning home, I realized that I didn’t do well.
I looked inward. Why was I afraid of talking to these people? I recalled that I clarified the truth to this group of people a few times in the past, but they didn’t want to listen, and even called the police. I was arrested because of this. Officers from the domestic security division told me: “This time you will be locked up for a few days. The next time, you’ll be sentenced.”
Gradually, a selfish thought and strong attachment were formed, and I feared being accused of being arrested, or sentenced. In order to protect myself, I dared not clarify the truth to these people. I knew that I should not be afraid, and sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate the old force factors behind the fear, as well as the rotten ghosts and communist evil spirit. But, within just a few seconds, my mind ran away, as the old force spirit didn’t want to be eliminated.
I had an idea. I wrote “eliminate” on a piece of paper, drew the word in thick and big letters, and placed it in front of me. I looked at it when sending forth righteous thoughts. I saw the word disappearing from the paper, and I noticed a hole in my body. The word descended into the hole until it disappeared. I immediately felt relaxed and comfortable. The next day, I went out to clarify the truth, and talked to whomever I met. I didn’t choose who I would talk to, and didn’t have that invisible pressure controlling me. However, that kind of fear would reappear sometimes.
When I studied “Fa Teaching on World Falun Dafa Day,” I finally realized that when the police said that I would be sentenced next time, I did not reject it or deny it. That was a substance and took root in my body. It turned out that that substance was at work.
After I understood this, as long as that kind of fear appeared in my mind, I would completely deny it and clear it out with righteous thoughts. If there is selfishness in my heart, the old forces would take advantage of it. As long as I cultivate to get rid of selfishness and egotism, and think of others needs first, nothing would be able to interfere with me.
Only my husband and I are at home, as our two sons live and work in other places and don’t come back often. After cultivating in Dafa, I wanted to be a meek wife, validate Dafa, and save my family members. But, thinking of this is one thing, doing it is another. When I encountered a problem, especially in front of my husband, I would forget that I am a cultivator and use a human mindset to deal with the issue. Thus, I missed many opportunities to improve my xinxing, and many attachments were not eliminated. One of the things my husband would often say is, “It’s not what you say that counts, it’s what you do.”
When a conflict arose with my husband, I would quarrel with him. I usually couldn’t get over it, but eventually I would have no other choice, but to look within.
Master saw my human notions, so every time I had a conflict with my husband, his attitude was usually very firm and he would not give in even a little bit. While we were arguing, I would wish that he could say a few words less, be considerate of my hard work at home, and be a little more tolerant of me. But, that never happened. Only when I looked inward and truly realized that it was my fault, would he stop. I was relying on my husband and had so much affection for him, so Master helped me to see my attachments through the conflicts.
I warned myself not to treat my husband as my support. I must treat myself as a practitioner, look inward to cultivate, and not to quarrel with him again. If I can’t do that, I am not worthy of being Master’s disciple.
My determination really worked. It has been more than two years since that day. My husband and I have been living a harmonious life with hardly any conflicts. I learned to treat myself as a practitioner. I didn’t force my husband to do anything, and would instead discuss things with him, and find a good way to proceed. During the process, he admired me for doing well in this regard.
There is a sewer outside our house, and some people would often pour dirty water into it, or even dump trash there. The place around the sewer was very dirty. I often cleaned the place, and couldn’t help but complain in my heart: Some people only care for themselves and don’t care about the environment.
When I saw more trash dumped into the sewer, just as I was about to complain, I suddenly remembered that I am a practitioner, and should clean it if I had time. A cultivator could only impose strict requirements on him/herself, not on others. If ordinary people were all that good, Master would not need to rectify the Fa. Thinking this way, I was no longer attached to this matter.
The closer we approach the end of the Fa rectification, the stricter the demands are on cultivators, and there must be no omission of attachments that must be eliminated.
I sell vegetables at a farmers’ market, and when I was done I packed up my things and prepared to go home. Another vendor wanted to borrow my scales, so I said, “You will have to borrow someone else’s, I’m leaving.”
He was angry and said unpleasant words. After walking a few steps, I realized that as a practitioner I couldn’t behave like that. I quickly went back and lent him the scales.
I looked inward on the way home, and asked myself why didn’t that man borrow scales from someone else? One reason was that I didn’t want the extra trouble, and didn’t want to unpack my things after I had packed them up. Another reason was that I didn’t think of others first, and only thought of myself.
One night, a practitioner came to my home and said, “The police have been looking for practitioners with a name list [of those wanting to quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP)] for the past two days, so you need to be prepared.” After he left, I looked inward, and asked myself: Was I calm and poised when I heard this information?
The answer was no, as I was afraid of being persecuted. After finding my attachment, I sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate it. I thought: I cultivate Falun Dafa, and I’m a disciple of Li Hongzhi. I’m here to help Master rectify the Fa and save sentient beings. No matter who comes to my home, I will not be afraid. I will save whoever comes, and will face everyone with dignity.
I calmed down and my heart became brighter and more peaceful. So far, no one has come to look for me.
I am a local coordinator, and had a problem with Baohong, another coordinator. I knew that this state was not inline with the Fa, so I sat down with him several times to find the reason, but often felt that it was Baohong’s problem. Because of my conflict with him, none of the other coordinators wanted to participate in the coordination work.
When other practitioners pointed out Baohong’s problem, he refused to accept it, and quarreled with us. Later, everyone simply stopped talking to each other, and that state had been going on for a long time. Recently, when practitioners studied the Fa together, Baohong and another coordinator started arguing again, and it was particularly intense.
After Fa study, a practitioner and I went home together, and talked about Baohong along the way. As I approached my home, I realized that when there is a conflict between two practitioners, why didn’t I cultivate myself and instead criticize the practitioner? Why did I have such a big problem with Baohong?
My expectation of him was too high. I thought as he was a coordinator, everything he did had to be in accordance with the Fa. If I found something he did was not in line with the Fa, I wanted him to make the correction quickly. However, the way I pointed out the problem was forceful and commanding, and not kind. I didn’t see his good side. For many years, I’ve been judging him with this kind of notion.
After finding the root cause of my problem, my attitude toward Baohong changed, and I no longer hold any negative thoughts or views about him. When I talked to him again, I could point out his shortcomings with my goodwill, and he sincerely accepted my opinion. Speaking of this, I am truly ashamed of myself!