(Minghui.org) My husband and I read Dafa books, do the exercises, send forth righteous thoughts, and clarify the truth together. We often share our understandings of the Fa and point out each others’ shortcomings.
I recently noticed that my husband was doing the meditation incorrectly. When he separated his hands, one to each side, his arms dropped below the waist and his fingers pointed down. During the strengthening of supernatural powers, he kept moving his arms up and down.
I often reminded him, “Raise your arm, and stay conscious.” Even though he corrected himself, his arm would soon drop again. I reminded him every day for many days. I ran out of patience eventually, and my attitude and tone of voice were no longer kind.
I became angry, and thought, “We should reach a tranquil state during meditation. If I have to keep reminding you of your movements, how can I remain in a tranquil state? I’m looking after you so you should be considerate of me as well. Why do you always make me worry about you?”
One day while meditating, he leaned back and it looked like he fell asleep. I yelled, “You’re falling asleep!” Startled, he shouted back at me, “I didn’t fall asleep!” He stopped meditating and got off the bed.
I was shocked. I did it for his own good, so why was he so upset? Am I wrong? I looked within and was surprised by what I found.
First of all, I didn’t meet the standard of “Truthfulness.” When I helped my husband correct his movements, it wasn’t completely for him. I was thinking of myself too—I could meditate without interruption if I didn’t have to look at him frequently. Wasn’t I being selfish then? I did it for his own good, but in a superficial way.
I criticized him severely when his movements were not up to the standard. That was not being kind.
When my husband didn’t show much improvement for a long time, I lost my patience and got upset. I wasn’t being tolerant.
How did I cultivate for 20 years? I was so far away from the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance.
I realized that Master had my husband do the exercises incorrectly to expose my deeply hidden attachments—selfishness and resentment. It was to help me look within and improve my character!
I was ashamed and remorseful. I felt bad for failing Master, and was sorry for not recognizing my husband’s selfless help. Nevertheless, I was more at ease after those bad substances were gone.
We meditated the next morning, and I didn’t look at my husband. The field around me was clean and clear, and my heart was peaceful and quiet. I knew looking within helped me find my problem. My husband said afterward, “My movements were up to standard, and I felt tranquil. I haven’t felt this way in a long time.” We both smiled.
When I looked within, and removed the attachments and ill thoughts, my cultivation environment changed, and everything around me flowed with ease.
Whenever we encounter problems, looking within is genuinely cultivating ourselves, and therefore assimilating to Dafa.
This is my current understanding, please kindly correct me if there is anything inappropriate.