Looking Within and Understanding the Seriousness of Cultivation

(Minghui.org) Before I started practicing Falun Dafa, I suffered from various illnesses on an ongoing basis. I was very sensitive to pain. I was operated on several times, and because of a spinal cord infection after surgery, I was on the verge of death or quadriplegia. After a month of hospitalization, I overcame the disease. I knew that there must have been something very important in my life that had allowed me to continue living without any mobility problems.

However, I suffered from severe migraines that lasted for several days. I could only find relief by taking medication, as well as signing in to a hospital.

I began to practice Falun Dafa in 2011. I recovered within a very short time.

Looking Within and Correcting the Wrong State of Health

As I progressed in my cultivation I learned that not acting in accordance with the Fa brought me incorrect states in my health, that is, it somatized my state with injuries in my body.

I have had several experiences where I have not acted within the Fa and immediately it somatized with some physical ailment.

But, perhaps the most serious ones have occurred this year. One day I woke up with sores in my mouth, a situation that gradually worsened, resulting in swollen lips, fever, and difficulty eating and speaking. I knew I had done something wrong that was causing this physical ailment.

I began to look inside to see where I had gone wrong, looking for what kind of attachments were causing this problem, while reflecting on what I was doing that was not agreeing with the Fa. I increased my study of Zhuan Falun, righteous thoughts, and generally tried to raise my xinxing. I found attachments related to “speech” and emphasized the topic of the cultivation of speech but the mouth problem did not show any improvement. I had several weeks of reflection and searching the Fa. I doubted whether it was a matter of fixing by the old forces or eliminating karma.

After a month and a half, the condition in my mouth continued with no relief of the pain and no improvement in my physical appearance, and on the contrary, each time a new affliction appeared.

A fellow cultivator asked me if I had found the root of the attachment that was causing me this tribulation, she made me realize that it is not “just to look for and find the attachment” but to find deep in the heart the reason or cause of that attachment, and eliminate it.

After this, I remembered that for some months I had been working on eliminating my attachment to fighting with my husband. Although he is a respectful person, he has a strong temper, is demanding, and is sometimes very unpleasant. I knew I had to restrain myself and behave with compassion, and although I thought I had improved my behavior, I was doing it very superficially.

I remembered how a week before, I had an argument with him, as he said unfair and hurtful things to me, even criticizing and doubting my cultivation, which made me very angry, I felt an incredible rage and an immense anger in my heart. That night I acted like an ordinary person, crying with anguish and deep pain at what he had said to me. It was so much rage that it prevented me from thinking as a true cultivator does about what I might have done that made him so angry and instead he kept mumbling his hurtful words.

When I searched for the true cause of my reaction to him, I discovered that it was an immense anger that I felt inside my heart and blinded me. It was anger, the cause of my bad attitude. I found the true cause, accepted it, and took the firm determination to work on eliminating that attachment and eradicate it once and for all!

I got the answer when I found Master’s teaching:

“When a cultivator’s mind departs from the Fa, the evil will find its way in.” (“Fa Teaching Given at the Conference in Florida, U.S.A.,” Collected Teachings Given Around the World Volume II)

Dafa is wonderful! It only took me one day to solve my oral problem. I consulted a dentist and he confirmed that my problem was caused by a special gum toothpaste that I had started using and that was already proven in the market to cause all those oral disorders. It was an instrument of Dafa to teach me to find the real cause of my attachment to fight anger and rage. It was two months of learning in my cultivation.

I quote from a practitioner who wrote his cultivation experience: A physical challenge gives us clues about where to look within to find our hidden attachments or notions.

I hereby would like to remind every practitioner: If you have pain anywhere in your body, please look inside for the root cause. Think about if you have been to places where you shouldn’t have been or done things that a practitioner shouldn’t have done. If your eyes hurt, is it because you have seen things that you shouldn’t have seen? This is not absolute, but looking inward like this frequently may reveal attachments that can then be eliminated.

It is now five months since the problem with my husband, and I have not failed again. I believe that I have eliminated the attachment to feeling anger and rage during an argument with him.

I feel fortunate and privileged to have passed this test that has allowed me to eliminate karma, overcome the attachment to feeling anger, and improve my xinxing.

Cultivation Is Serious

My second cultivation experience is related to my unclear understanding of Dafa principles.

In my later years, my husband and I have been looking for a financial investment that would allow us to earn an income to support us in the future when we stop working. Our pension is very small and not enough to support us.

The financial director of our company offered us an investment from a very serious international company that offers high financial returns. I asked her if it was an e-currency or a pyramid scheme, and the answer was no. It's just an overseas investment that we can invest in. She said it is just an offshore investment that offers a very attractive financial return.

I was aware that practitioners are not allowed to invest in pyramid schemes or digital currencies, but I ignored this and upon the explanation that it was just an investment that would guarantee me a better financial future in life, I agreed along with my husband to invest our savings in that company. I encouraged the rest of the family to take advantage and invest in this business.

When I saw the first very high returns on the investment we made, I knew it was nothing normal. They were so high that I began to investigate more in detail and discovered that it was a digital currency business. No wonder I did not feel good about what was happening! I could not accept making so much money this way. I decided to share what I had done with some fellow practitioners who sent me various digital currency farming experiences and even sent me the Minghui Notification “A Notice on Digital Currency” posted on July 6, 2018:

“To Dafa disciples both inside and outside of China:

"1. You must not mine, promote, or deal in digital currency among Dafa practitioners and Dafa disciples;

"2. Dafa disciples must not participate [in such activities];

"3. You must not engage [in such activities] in the name of Master.

"Those who violate the notice are sabotaging the Fa.

"We ask every fellow practitioner to please persist in studying the Fa well and look within to cultivate ourselves in this tumultuous world.

"Only by staying rational and clearheaded in the Fa can we not be interfered with or dragged down by the old forces."

It was heartbreaking what I felt as a Falun Dafa cultivator at that moment. I cried out of shame and remorse for having done such a business. This is not how Fa righteous cultivators act and acquire their income. How could I have fallen into the trap of the old forces? How could I have acted against the principles and requirements of the Fa. How could I undo the business? I just wanted this to be a dream.

After going through great stress, anguish, and despair, that same week, I came down with a severe headache. My body returned to the state it was in before I started my cultivation. I had a daily headache, the headaches returned and for a month I was suffering from this severe pain. I had to endure it day by day without showing it to my family because I knew that they would insist on going to the doctor and I would not do it. Of course, I didn't take any medication and I just put up with it, I knew it was karmic retribution.

I tried to undo the business by selling those coins, but it was not possible for another year. I had to do something to pay back a little for the bad I had done. I made a decision not to ask about the return as I did almost daily in the beginning. I told my husband that he would follow up on the investment and that I would stay out of it. I isolated myself from the issue, as I knew I could not dive any deeper into what happened nor could I continue to whip myself and feel like a victim. That’s not the attitude of a grower either and I couldn’t go to extremes. I had to make amends and act rationally.

After understanding what had happened to me, being deeply remorseful, understanding that feeling guilty was not the solution, and sending strong righteous thoughts could I let go of the issue. Then the headache disappeared completely.

I understood that this negative test was overcome through the process of looking inward and following Master Li’s teachings and requirements.

For both of the experiences I am sharing, I found it very helpful to reflect on Master’s teaching:

“If you, as a student [of Dafa], do not follow Master's requirements, it is definitely no simple thing. The old forces have arranged for all Dafa disciples a set of their things, so if a Dafa disciple doesn't follow Master's requirements, he must be following the old forces' arrangements. The old forces are in essence gigantic trials and tribulations that accompany you at all times, focused on whether in Fa-rectification Dafa disciples are able to step forward.

If after going through this ordeal some students are still not clearheaded, then they will miss [the opportunities presented in] all of this. Only when you follow Master's requirements are you validating the Fa and cultivating yourself as a Dafa disciple, and only then are you a true Dafa disciple.” (“Be Clearheaded”)