I’m Grateful for the Tribulations and Joys of Cultivation

(Minghui.org) I’ve practiced Falun Dafa for more than 20 years, and my cultivation path has been bumpy. Before I started practicing, I was plagued by ailments, including anemia, inflamed kidneys, ovaries, and sinuses, as well as heart problems. I had frequent dizzy spells, and my hands and feet were always cold. But just two weeks after I began practicing, all my health issues disappeared and I felt completely free and lighthearted.

Before I started practicing, every day was a struggle because of my husband and parents-in-law. My husband was a male chauvinist who frequently lost his temper and threw things around. He hit me several times, the last time when our son was in junior high school. I didn’t want to live anymore, and I cried until I had no tears left. Several times, I wanted to end it all, but there was always some force holding me back, reminding me how my suicide would impact my son and my parents.

I felt my life was worse than death. I lived with my in-laws for over 20 years. I had to go to work every day, take care of them, and take our child to school. My husband was never home, always running off on business trips. Sometimes he was gone for a year at a time. Back then, I absolutely hated him. Life was so difficult, on top of my poor health, but I endured each day for the sake of my son.

Both my in-laws eventually passed away, my mother-in-law in 1995 when she was 84, followed by my father-in-law in 1996 when he was 88. When my child went to college, I told my husband, “Let’s get a divorce. I don’t want to be with you anymore.” Although my husband knew he was in the wrong, he wouldn’t admit it.

Two weeks later, I had the great fortune to find out about Falun Dafa, and my life changed dramatically. I came to terms with my life, let go of my previous thinking, and found my way home. Master’s Fa was a guiding light every day, helping me move forward on a bright road to complete my cultivation.

I feel incredibly fortunate to have found Dafa in this lifetime. I no longer take things personally. I always consider everything from the perspective of the Fa, look for my own mistakes, and strive to do better. At home, I influenced my husband by caring for him. Whether it was food, clothing, or daily necessities, I prioritized buying things for him. When I went out to clarify the facts about Falun Dafa, I also purchased his favorite foods.

He was inspired by Dafa to help distribute truth-clarification materials. We each carried a bag of materials and rode our bicycles through the streets, visiting rural areas and farmlands. That was in the 2000s. He also practiced the exercises, but he didn’t like studying the Fa. He asked me to read to him, so I did. It was a perfect exercise for me since I’d only finished the second grade. After listening for a while, he didn’t want to continue. He later developed diabetes and high blood pressure, and then he had a stroke. I cared for him for six years.

Caring for my husband was like caring for a child—patience, love, and no resentment were essential. I cleaned him up when he soiled himself, and sometimes, if he couldn’t have a bowel movement, I had to help him. At the same time, I did what I needed to do as a Dafa practitioner—study the Fa and clarify the truth. Although my schedule was extremely tight and exhausting, I felt happy in my heart because of Dafa. Dafa is like a guiding light, illuminating my path forward. I truly let go, so I was no longer afraid of dirt, hardship, or fatigue. During his illness, his temper got worse, and he often got angry and cursed me, but I ignored it.

Another reason I treated him so well was because I was afraid that if I said anything mean to him, he’d say something bad about Dafa or practitioners. I was afraid he’d have negative thoughts about Falun Dafa, so I treated him well. Perhaps I eventually paid off my debt to him, because he stopped cursing me the month before he passed away.

Two hours before he went into the intensive care unit, I asked him, “Can you hold on?” He said he couldn’t. Realizing that he might not make it this time, I called our son and asked him to come home. I asked my husband, “Can I give you a haircut?” He said yes, so I did (I always cut his hair). I offered to wash his feet, and he said yes. When I asked him if there was anything he wanted to say, he said there wasn't but that having me by his side gave him peace of mind. He was admitted to the intensive care unit that night and passed away the following night.

Once I truly let go of my attachments, it wasn’t difficult. I am deeply grateful for the tribulations my husband put me through. I owe him, as well as my father-in-law and mother-in-law, so much gratitude for giving me so many opportunities to cultivate and eliminate so much karma.

We cultivators are all on the golden path paved by Master. I cannot express my gratitude to Master in words. I can only listen to Master’s instructions, do the three things well, and cultivate diligently. Thank you, Master!