(Minghui.org) My mind was unsettled, and I started to be impolite to our customers. When some of them asked me for deposit slips, I impatiently said they should have filled them out at their companies before they came. The atmosphere was tense. Then I remembered Master’s words:
“We have said that good or bad comes from a person’s initial thought, and the thought at that moment can bring about different consequences.” (Lecture Four, Zhuan Falun)
I thought: “Isn’t suffering a good thing? Some people are even willing to endure more hardship to achieve consummation sooner, so why should I complain?” After I had this thought, my mind immediately calmed down, and I continued working. The line of people gradually thinned out.
* * *
Greetings, Master! Greetings, fellow practitioners!
I began practicing Falun Dafa in 1994. My parents and older brother attended Master Li’s lectures in person. At their suggestion, I read Zhuan Falun and began to cultivate. The Fa principles in the book really spoke to me.
I always felt as if I had been searching for something eternal. After I read Zhuan Falun, I understood that it was the eternal truth of the universe—Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. This was what I was looking for! I was so happy! It felt like a huge weight had finally been lifted from my heart. I felt particularly peaceful when I slept—I slept so soundly I didn’t even dream.
I would like to share some of the insights I have gained through studying the Fa, understanding the Fa principles, and using the Fa to guide my cultivation in order to validate Dafa.
Master said:
“We have said that good or bad comes from a person’s initial thought, and the thought at that moment can bring about different consequences.” (Lecture Four,Zhuan Falun)
I personally experienced this the first year I began practicing as I recalled when I read my cultivation diary from that period of time.
I had been practicing Falun Dafa for over a year by then. By doing the exercises and studying the teachings, my body and mind were transformed and elevated. At that time, I was working at the corporate counter in a bank, and I was responsible for the companies’ cash receipts. Because many companies had accounts with my bank, the cash receipts were substantial, so the work was exacting and required high professional skills, which new employees couldn’t handle.
One day, my partner had an exam, so the manager assigned a new employee to work with me. Since it was Friday afternoon (when companies deposit excess funds into the bank), there were an unusually large number of people depositing money. The new employee wasn’t good at counting money or using the abacus (banks used abacuses for accounting back then). I had to collect payments while also helping her, and I felt overwhelmed. I couldn’t help but feel resentful: collecting payments was already difficult, and now I had to help a new employee. It was exhausting! I thought to myself, “I won’t do this ever again.”
My mind was unsettled, and I started to be impolite to our customers. When some of them asked me for deposit slips, I impatiently said they should have filled them out at their companies before they came. The atmosphere was tense. Then I remembered Master’s words:
“We have said that good or bad comes from a person’s initial thought, and the thought at that moment can bring about different consequences.” (Lecture Four,Zhuan Falun)
I thought, “Isn’t suffering a good thing? Some people are even willing to endure more hardship to achieve consummation sooner, so why should I complain?” With this thought, my mind immediately calmed down, and I continued working. The line of people gradually thinned out.
This incident showed me that Master’s teachings are correct, that a single thought can truly lead to different consequences. I had even greater faith in Master and in Dafa. This sentence wasn’t just a sentence in a book, it became my guide to life, and I made up my mind to continue practicing Falun Dafa.
It can be said that my cultivation path has always been accompanied by “looking inward.” When my daughter was two or three years old, one night after she had drunk her milk, I tried to put her to sleep. But no matter how I tried, she wouldn’t fall asleep. My patience was wearing thin, and I started to get anxious and angry.
My husband (a fellow practitioner) was doing his own thing, oblivious to the situation. I couldn’t hold back anymore, and my anger flared up. I yelled at him and said he didn’t help me take care of his own daughter. That riled him up, and he smacked her bottom twice. This only made things worse when she burst into tears. Because she cried so hard, she vomited all the milk she had just drunk onto the blankets and sheets.
Seeing this made me even angrier. I scolded my husband, and, in a fit of anger, I stormed out of the house and headed to my mother’s. As I walked, the cold wind blew against my face, calming me down. I became clear-headed and started to look inward, trying to figure out where I had gone wrong.
I shouldn’t have gotten angry. My daughter probably didn’t want to sleep because she wanted to play with me a little longer. If I had been more patient and spent more time with her, she might have fallen asleep. I shouldn’t have been so impatient. I was only thinking about myself, about getting her to sleep quickly so I could get on with my own things. I had completely disregarded her needs. My husband had worked all day and was exhausted, so he wanted to rest, too. I was wrong to yell at him.
I also realized it was wrong to complain to my mother. So I turned around and went home. I opened the door and the house was quiet. My husband and daughter were asleep, and the only sound was the washing machine running. Looking at the peaceful scene, I couldn’t believe how chaotic things had been. This experience showed me that looking inward is wonderful. One second it’s like a war, and the next, it’s calm. After I looked within, it was if nothing had happened and all the troubles had vanished.
One profound lesson etched in my cultivation journey was failing to regard the Fa as teacher. The practice site I attended was established by my parents. They had a significant influence on me from the very beginning of my cultivation, and I followed their example. I witnessed the practice site grow from just a few people to many. The head of the main site presented them with the flag of a Falun Dafa practice site, marking the site’s official founding. After that, many people came and started to practice. The number of practitioners increased daily, growing from just a few to nearly a hundred.
My father was always the first to arrive at the practice site with a tape recorder to play the exercise music. At that time, we lived on a mountain, so we had to walk down more than a hundred flights of stairs. From the beginning of my cultivation, I practiced the exercises every day without fail. It often snows in the winter in the north. At four or five in the morning, while others were still asleep, my parents and I were already on our way to the practice site. Because the road was slippery, the three of us supported each other as we walked, leaving long footprints in the white snow. In the snow, I looked back at the footprints behind me, thinking that the three of us were helping and reminding each other on the path of cultivation, progressing together towards consummation.
This blissful and wonderful time of cultivation was fleeting, though. When I was still quite ignorant about cultivation, in 1998, the old forces began their destructive test on us practitioners at the practice site. Many practitioners had come because of Falun Dafa’s miraculous effects on healing and health, but they weren’t truly cultivating. Due to my father’s sudden death, many stopped practicing. Ultimately, only a dozen or so continued. This incident made me clearly realize the seriousness of cultivation. I had a beautiful hope that practicing the exercises and studying the Fa would lead to consummation. But as Master said,
“We also have some students with a misunderstanding. They think that once they practice Falun Dafa they are assured that their physical bodies will never die.” (“An Explicit Reminder,” Essentials for Further Advancement)
I never imagined anyone would suddenly leave, so this was a wake-up call for me.
In the face of losing a loved one, what would you choose? Would you continue cultivating? I also understood the profound meaning of Master’s words:
“In the past, after climbing into a cave with the help of a rope, a cultivator would cut off the rope to practice cultivation in the cave. If this person could not succeed in cultivation, he would die inside it.” (Lecture Eight, Zhuan Falun)
Cultivation is very serious—it’s not a game. I asked myself, “Do you still want to cultivate?” After careful consideration, I decided to continue practicing: “No matter what happens to others, I will steadfastly walk this path of cultivation.”
Here’s what happened. One night, after my father finished meditating, he collapsed, unconscious and vomiting. Should we go home or to the hospital? At the time, we believed that cultivation could lead to enlightenment, and we never expected someone to collapse halfway through. Seeing this was a huge shock to me. I couldn’t accept the reality before me, and my disbelief began to bombard me relentlessly.
At that time, two voices were fiercely battling within me: one of disbelief and questioning, and the other of belief and rebuttal. I was unable to think clearly and in a state of utter confusion. Fellow practitioners asked for our opinion: Should we take my father home or to the hospital? A fellow practitioner who was a doctor advised against moving him in his condition and said we should wait for an ambulance. My mother, who was also a doctor, was bewildered. From a medical perspective, she agreed with the other doctor’s advice, but she was actually being held back by conventional thinking. Because of my mental confusion, I was no longer able to think clearly.
My mother and I were at a loss, so we reported the situation to the main Falun Dafa coordinators in the province. They suggested taking him to the hospital and letting him recover. In 1998, Master’s teachings weren’t explained as clearly, and much of it was up to us to understand. At that time, our understanding was that a true cultivator, already free from illness, shouldn’t go to the hospital. My father mentioned many times in the past that we shouldn’t go to the hospital, that we should be true practitioners.
Following the advice of the main coordinators, we decided to take my father to the hospital. Afterwards, Master gave us three more hints, but we didn’t understand. First, our mother tried calling 120 (the emergency number) but couldn’t get through. We were eventually transferred to 120 through another hospital. Second, when the ambulance arrived and the doctors were carrying him out, the lights in the room suddenly went out. We wondered if this meant he shouldn’t go to the hospital, but a fellow practitioner said it was because of him, so we continued. Third, at the hospital, during the examination, a fellow practitioner held our father’s head in both hands and noticed that his head was slightly shaking. At that time, he appeared unconscious, unable to move his limbs or speak. Perhaps his consciousness was clear, but he couldn’t control his limbs. Perhaps he was using all his strength to tell the practitioner that he didn’t want to go to the hospital. The practitioner didn’t understand it, either. Our father passed away while he was being examined.
We later reflected on all this together. If we hadn’t taken Father to the hospital and had gone straight home, would the outcome have been different? The lesson was profound. Why didn’t we understand when Master gave us such obvious guidance? Did we regard the Fa as teacher? No! We listened to other people’s words, and human sentiment prevailed. The main coordinators are also cultivators—they are not Master. The key is that we didn’t listen to Master’s words, didn’t regard the Fa as our teacher, and didn’t use the Fa to measure things. Even with Master’s guidance, we still didn’t understand this.
In later lectures, Master explained the reasons for my father’s passing and his family’s behavior. This was an unforgettable lesson. In my subsequent cultivation, no matter what others said, I used Dafa’s principles to evaluate it. If it aligned with Dafa, I would listen; if it didn’t, I would point it out. I didn’t pander to others. After the persecution began in 1999, we received a so-called “Tenth Lecture.” We were able to regard the Fa as teacher and pointed out that it undermined the Fa. We resisted it and demanded the copies be destroyed. Lessons can help us grow and mature, but the lessons learned at the cost of a fellow practitioner’s life are very heavy. I often share my lessons with others, hoping that fellow practitioners will not repeat the same mistakes.
After the persecution began in 1999, we were among the first practitioners to buy computers to access Minghui.org. At that time, the computers were desktops and very expensive. Minghui.org was not yet blocked then, so we could access it directly, but Internet Explorer recorded our browsing history.
My older brother (a fellow practitioner) researched how to delete browsing history on Internet Explorer and then taught us. Around 2000, the police were conducting door-to-door checks. At the time, our computer was in the living room near the entrance. The police saw it, didn’t say anything, asked a few questions, and left. A few days later, the police came again, saying they were passing by on a mission and asked us to turn on the computer to go online. They wanted to check our browsing history. Because we had deleted the browsing history, nothing happened.
Later, Minghui.org was blocked. My brother researched methods such as using VPNs and proxy servers to access Minghui.org, and then taught us how. Eventually, Falun Dafa practitioners developed our own circumvention software, such as Freegate. From the beginning of the persecution until now, no matter how the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) blocked it, we’ve always been able to access Minghui.org. We have never lost our connection with Minghui.org, just as Master said, “They have never been able to block the Minghui website!” (Teachings Given on Lantern Festival Day, 2003)
We visited Minghui.org and found its articles to be excellent, capable of exposing lies and clarifying the truth, so we decided to buy a printer. We downloaded the articles; studied the layout; then edited, printed and distributed copies ourselves. At first, we could only print A4 size, then we learned how to saddle stitch A5 size, and later, saddle stitching software made printing much easier.
After that, Minghui.org started offering pre-edited flyers and pamphlets, which could be downloaded and printed, making things much more convenient. At first, we printed them ourselves and distributed them. But as more and more practitioners needed the materials, we dedicated ourselves to making truth-clarification materials. That’s how our home-based materials production was established.
I remember our first printer was a Lexmark. One ink cartridge could print over 200 pages. Once it ran out, you had to replace it. The cost of replacing a cartridge was equivalent to buying the printer itself. We used the economy mode to print the lightest colors, hoping to print more materials. Later, to reduce costs, we researched refilling the cartridges to extend their lifespan and print more informational materials. Then we studied continuous ink supply systems, which eliminated the hassle of refilling, further lowering costs. We were able to print clear pamphlets and leaflets.
Initially, we paid for everything ourselves, including ink cartridges, ink, and paper. At that time, my husband was the sole breadwinner. Aside from our regular household expenses, all our money went towards making materials. Later, as the demand for materials increased, some practitioners insisted on donating to the production site, and we accepted what they gave us. We were very careful their money, ensuring we used it for its designated purpose.
In 2002, I left my job and stayed home to work full-time on producing materials. My husband and I worked together. He was responsible for buying supplies and delivering materials, while I was responsible for producing them. Every week, he would buy several packs of A4 paper, and on Fridays, he would carry a pack of printed materials to deliver to fellow practitioners. This went on day after day, through cold winters and hot summers, without any holidays. For the safety of the production site, we almost never visited other people’s homes. Apart from family members, we didn’t interact with anyone else. When my daughter was little, I never took her to the movies or to the park.
Later, in order to continue resisting the persecution and to protect practitioners, Minghui.org wanted material production sites to be more widespread, that is, “blooming everywhere.” So we helped fellow practitioners establish these sites, teaching them the techniques we’d mastered. For example, we established good relationships with ordinary repair shops, so that when fellow practitioners’ printers malfunctioned, they could be taken directly to these repair shops. After my husband was arrested in 2006, we mainly provided technical support to practitioners hosting production sites.
Looking back, the reason we were able to get through that difficult period and why our small, family-run material production site has been able to operate smoothly for so many years is because Master has always protected us. The reason we were able to overcome one difficulty after another is also because we were guided by Master during the research process. I remember when we were researching saddle stitch printing, I tried again and again, but I just couldn’t get it to work. I was discouraged and thought, “Forget it, I’ll give up and do something else.” But when I mustered up the courage to sit down at the computer again, I clicked on this and that, and suddenly it printed! How did I do it? I was a little confused, but I knew Master guided me. We just need to let go of our ego. Whatever Dafa needs us to do, we can do it well.
My daughter, a Falun Dafa practitioner, was put in an incubator immediately after birth because the umbilical cord had been wrapped around her neck for too long. We weren’t allowed to see her. We were told that she might have heart and lung problems and couldn’t eat and that her heart and lungs would need to be checked the next day. The doctor told us to make a decisive decision if asked whether to keep the baby. My husband and I wept when we heard this.
The next day, my mother came to see me and said she’d had a dream the night before in which someone told her that the baby might have heart and lung problems, but it was all over now. The doctor later told us that the baby was better and could drink milk. We realized that the person in the dream was Master and that Master had saved her; her life was also given by Dafa.
My daughter started drawing in elementary school and was able to get into junior and senior high schools that specialized in art. She finally got into one of the best art academies in China. Now she is overseas, validating Falun Dafa in her own way. Looking back on the whole process, she realizes that everything was arranged in an orderly manner.
That was in 2022 when my daughter, once a little girl, had grown into a young adult. After graduating, she found a job. But due to the COVID pandemic, the company was in arrears with employee wages. She considered quitting but felt lost about the future. Then, through a fellow practitioner, she learned about the possibility of studying abroad. She heard this from a practitioner who didn’t cultivate her speech. My intuition told me it was true.
I told my daughter that “we trust Master and that our paths are all arranged by Master.” If he allowed her to go, she would definitely succeed; if he didn’t allow her to go, she definitely wouldn’t succeed. We’d only find out by trying. Without any attachments, we should let go of our worries, and we should just listen to Master’s arrangements. So we started preparing. It was only six months before the start of the semester abroad. Generally, you need to prepare to study abroad at least a year in advance, especially for art majors who also need to prepare a portfolio. But, miraculously, it seemed that everything needed for her to study abroad was in order.
Fortunately, my husband earns a good income working for a private company. Since we hadn’t bought a house, our savings over the years could cover tuition and living expenses. Also our daughter attended a prestigious university, and her assignments could be compiled into a portfolio. The overseas university didn’t require English proficiency scores, so she could go there first and then learn the language. In addition, I had experience with visas at my previous company, so I knew a little about the visa application process. Plus, I frequently travel to other cities for training, so I knew a little about booking flights. Also, I used to work in a bank, so I knew a bit about bank statements, exchange rates, international remittances, and credit cards, which was enough to handle paying registration fees, obtaining bank statements, exchanging dollars, and making remittances when applying to foreign schools.
Through a series of coincidences and without going through an agency, we spent four months submitting applications and received offers from overseas schools. She then applied for visas, booked flights, packed her luggage, and arrived on the other side of the ocean.
Here a little anecdote about waiting for the visa interview. There were many people in line because the visa for that country is very difficult to obtain. Everyone was nervous, so the atmosphere was a bit tense. My daughter said to Master in her heart, “Wherever Master arranges for me to go, I will go. I can validate Dafa wherever I am.” Then she silently recited the Fa in her heart and got the visa without a problem.
Through this series of events, I came to understand what Master meant when he said:
“Once a person steps onto the path of cultivation, there will be nothing coincidental in his life from then on. Since your cultivation has been arranged systematically and time isn’t that plentiful, there can’t possibly be anything that’s coincidental. Everything has been tightly arranged.” (“Fa Teaching Given at a Meeting in New York,” Teachings at Conferences in the United States)
Although my daughter is now living abroad, the physical distance cannot separate our hearts. She often shares with us that, when she sees some young Falun Dafa practitioners stop practicing after growing up, she reflects that a big reason she was able to come to Falun Dafa as an adult is because, whenever she encountered difficulties as a child, I was able to comfort her and guide her with the principles of the Fa, allowing her to gradually realize the great wisdom of the Fa even without reading the books herself. She truly understood that Dafa could resolve any difficulty. “If my mother had only told me to read the books every time I encountered a problem, I might not have been able to come to Falun Dafa as an adult,” she said.
The experiences of studying abroad over the past few years have made my daughter more mature, both emotionally and in terms of self-cultivation. She told me, “There’s something else that makes me feel like I’m growing up. Before, when I encountered difficult situations, I would talk to you, and you could always use your experiences, insights, and understanding to show me how to solve the problem. I thought you were so wise. But now, more and more of the situations I encounter are different from the situations you faced. Your experience is no longer enough to provide me with perfect solutions. I’ve found that I have to forge many paths on my own. There’s a feeling that I’m going to be alone as I climb higher, and I’ll probably feel a bit lonely in the future. But this is an inevitable part of growing up, because what I’m going to achieve is not a second you, but a completely new life.”
My family of three are all Falun Dafa practitioners, so we are one small entity. At first, I didn’t realize this and often got angry with my daughter for not making her bed in the morning. I have come to realize that our family of three is one entity, and everyone has their responsibilities. My husband goes out to work to earn money to support the family and solve our financial problems so that my daughter and I don’t have to worry about making ends meet. I take care of the housework and cook for the family so that they can have a good meal when they come home, while my daughter does her duty as a student and studies hard. We can use the remaining time to do the three things. As a Dafa practitioner, I should think of others and do more to give them time. So I decided to make my daughter’s bed. When I changed, she changed, too, and now she helps me make my bed in the morning. The tense situation became peaceful.
We are a small collective in clarifying the truth. When we visited friends to clarify the truth, we asked our daughter to come with us. At first, she was reluctant. Later, we discussed the principles of Falun Dafa, and I shared my understanding with her: “You and your father and I are all practitioners, and ours is a happy family. The parents are successful in their careers, rational and wise, and the daughter is academically successful, filial, and sensible. This in itself is the truth, and it is validating Dafa. The CCP has spread rumors about Dafa practitioners, saying they neglect their families, have no affection for their relatives, commit suicide, and so on. These rumors are refuted by the facts.”
After hearing this, my daughter agreed to come with us. When we met families with children, the three of us chatted separately. The fathers talked to each other, the mothers talked to each other, and the children talked to each other. My daughter is introverted and slow to warm up. For her, chatting alone with strangers is a big challenge. I saw her blushing as she talked with a little girl. A friend’s daughter was very opinionated, but her parents were too controlling, which made her rebellious. We went to tell her the truth about Dafa and left her some informational leaflets. After that, her parents stopped interfering, and the girl’s grades improved.
That concludes my sharing. Thank you, Master, and thank you, fellow practitioners.
(Selected submission for the 23rd China Fa Conference on Minghui.org)