(Minghui.org) Before practicing Falun Dafa, I was selfish, unable to endure hardship, prone to withdrawing when faced with difficulties, and unwilling to accept criticism or hold myself to high standards. These traits became obstacles to my cultivation. I would like to share how I recently worked to eliminate attachments to rejecting criticism, craving praise, and excessive concern for my image and reputation. Please kindly point out anything that does not align with the Fa.
To inform people about Falun Dafa, I have been making truth-clarification materials that practitioners then distribute. We worked seamlessly together. However, for a period of time, my cultivation state was poor. I was constantly drowsy and muddled while studying the Fa, doing the exercises, and sending righteous thoughts. Struggling to break through, I kept making mistakes in my work and clashed with my partner. Whenever she criticized me, I argued back and refused to accept her feedback. Noticing my poor condition, she asked me to stop producing materials and gave me time to make adjustments. Yet after a week, I had made little improvement.
Then she invited me to stay at her home. While spending 24 hours a day together, she observed my lack of genuine cultivation and the many times my actions fell short of the Fa’s requirements. She sternly pointed out my shortcomings, leaving me no room to argue. It was the first time another practitioner had spoken to me that way. I worked hard to hold back my tears.
Overwhelmed, I felt like retreating, going home to make the materials, and not returning to her place. However, whenever I had such thoughts, it was as if she could read my mind. One day I had to leave, and before I went, she said, “Come back tonight. Having you here helps me get up for the morning exercises.” So, I returned to her home.
She continued to point out my shortcomings directly, even in front of other practitioners. I felt deeply uncomfortable and embarrassed, but I knew she had my best interests in mind. Because I lacked self-discipline, her sternness helped me gradually let go of attachments such as an inability to accept criticism, craving praise, and the desire to save face. Her help enabled me to quickly move out of a negative state and begin genuine cultivation.
During this period, a technical practitioner in our group was arrested, leaving a vacancy on the project. This practitioner had reached out to me once before but not to teach me technical skills. However, my partner thought of me and asked me to take charge of the project. Although I had some basic understanding, I lacked knowledge of many technical aspects, so I declined. She said, “You can’t always think of yourself. You need to consider the big picture. Step up and take this on.”
She added me to the project group. I couldn’t refuse, so I learned as I went. When I encountered difficulties I couldn’t resolve, I thought about backing out. However, she knew me so well and promptly reminded me, “Don’t keep thinking about yourself. You must let go of the self and keep others in your heart. Your focus needs to be on how you can clarify the truth to people.” I corrected myself immediately upon realizing my mistakes. Consequently, I believed I had truly removed the attachment to not accepting criticism.
One day, another practitioner came to my home and said her eyes hurt. It turned out that a practitioner couple had criticized her. They had been stern and blunt, and she became so upset that her eyes became bloodshot and painful. I said, “You’ve known them for so long. Try not to take it to heart. Just be tolerant of them.” This practitioner wanted to discuss the issue with me, yet during our conversation she kept emphasizing that one shouldn’t criticize others. After the practitioner left, I thought: “She doesn’t want to be criticized and insists that others shouldn’t criticize either. How is she supposed to cultivate?” Instead of looking inward at my own shortcomings, I focused on the practitioner’s faults.
Two days later, another incident occurred. The project group asked a young practitioner and me to each design an image file. Because she was more skilled at graphic design than I was, I had come to rely on her. I had other tasks to attend to, so I didn’t do the assignment. On the day the designs were due, everyone praised the young practitioner’s work, but my partner said I had been lazy. When I opened the files, I saw they weren’t in the correct image format, so I had to convert them before they could be laid out and printed. The young practitioner had created five designs, and I printed one copy of each for my partner to choose from.
To my surprise, after looking at the files, my partner firmly put them on the table and said, “You actually feel okay with bringing me something like this and even asking me to choose one?” I looked at her without responding, but inside I felt wronged. I wondered why everything suddenly became problematic when everyone had previously agreed on the design. Now the text was wrong, the colors were inaccurate, the images were blurry, and nothing seemed acceptable. I had created two versions of each image in different colors based on my partner’s instructions. During the process, I realized the blurriness stemmed from how I had extracted the images, not from the original file or the young practitioner’s work. When I met my partner again, I acknowledged that the mistakes were mine. Even so, she remained unhappy with the new designs and criticized me in front of two other practitioners.
On my way home, I poured out my grievances to Master in my mind: “Master, aren’t fellow practitioners being too harsh on me?” Just then, ahead of me, I heard two people talking. As I drew closer, I heard one say, “Someone did something wrong but won’t let anyone say a word about it.” That sentence struck me like a thunderclap, waking me up. Master watches over a practitioner’s cultivation at every moment. I had failed to meet expectations and had caused Master to worry again.
I also thought about the practitioner whose eyes were hurting. I realized that when someone speaks to you about an issue, if you view it from an everyday person’s perspective, you look outward and perceive it as blame or criticism. However, if you view it as a cultivator, you look inward and ask yourself if you tend to reject criticism, seek praise, and worry about saving face. Hearing about the practitioner’s situation was a signal for me to look inward. Yet it wasn’t until the incident with my partner that I realized I still hadn’t completely let go of the attachment to rejecting criticism.
As I was writing this sharing article, I recognized that the refusal to accept criticism reflects elements of CCP culture. After all, isn’t the evil Party all about being “great, glorious, and correct,” refusing to tolerate even a single word of dissent? It attacks anyone who speaks ill of it. How could we, as cultivators, have such a mindset? We should achieve the state Master described, in which we are open to whatever anyone says to us.
Master said:
“From this point on, whoever can’t take criticism is not being diligent, whoever can’t take criticism is not displaying the state of a cultivator, or at least on this issue. (Applause) If someone still can’t pass this test, I’ll tell you, he is in a very dangerous situation, because for a cultivator this is the most fundamental thing, it’s at the top of the list of things to eliminate, and it has to be eliminated. If you don’t get rid of it, you won’t achieve Consummation. Don’t let it become that it’s ordinary people doing the work of Dafa disciples. You want to achieve Consummation, not good fortune.” (Teachings at the Conference in Los Angeles)
The above teaching made me realize the importance of eliminating the attachment to rejecting criticism. My understanding is limited. However, I am sharing my experiences and hope that practitioners will pay attention to cultivating away that attachment.
I must pass this test, thoroughly remove the attachment, and continue to cultivate well.
Gratitude to Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners!