(Clearwisdom.net)
Greetings, esteemed Master!
Greetings, fellow practitioners!
Although several articles that I had submitted for previous Internet experience sharing conferences were never selected for publication, I still want to write down my cultivation experience for this conference to examine my cultivation, answer Master's call for articles and share my experiences with fellow practitioners.
Master said, “... your cultivation is different from that of the past and the future” (“Fa-Rectification Period Dafa Disciples” from Essentials for Further Advancement II). It is the way that each of us has descended through various cosmic layers and arrived in this world to assist Master rectify the Fa and save sentient beings. My understanding of how to walk this path well is to fulfill a practitioner's mission by following Dafa's principles.
Letting Go of Self to Collaborate with Fellow Practitioners
During my early years of validating the Fa, I did not like to work with other practitioners. Instead, I went out to distribute truth clarification materials on my own. When I had to move away from my home to avoid persecution, I particularly preferred working alone due to concerns for my safety and security. However, as I studied the Fa more, I realized that my idea was not right because it not only reflected my self-centered mentality, but also went against Master's requirement for us to work and improve as one body. Master said:
“A person who has a position of responsibility is actually a coordinator, and getting more capable people involved is what's key. How big of a role can any one individual play? Only when the group as a whole plays its role has the coordinator done well. When a coordinator does well himself, well, if you're the only one doing well, then you should just be an average student in that case. The key is that you have got to play the role of and fulfill the duties of a coordinator.” (“Teaching the Fa at the Western U.S. International Fa Conference”)
In order to help more people know the facts about Dafa, local practitioners discussed that each of our Fa study groups should be responsible for the villages in their area. I liked to work this way and frequently went to the villages in my area to validate the Fa, thinking other practitioners would have been doing the same. However, I later learned that this was not the case, as some practitioners had not gone to the villages that they were supposed to be responsible for. I noticed that I had the notion of only wanting to work well on what was assigned to me, instead of considering other practitioners' work. I was worried that by spending time on other practitioners' duties, it would affect my own commitment to Dafa projects. This notion was indeed selfish because I was only concerned about my achievements and not the enhancement of all practitioners as one body.
Through sharing and discussion among fellow practitioners, we realized there were some problems in the local Dafa work and proposed some plans to improve it. We identified the areas that had not received enough information about Dafa and went there together at the same time to clarify the facts. This way, not only did we work efficiently, but the influence on local people was also significant and many of them gained a good impression of Dafa.
After having distributed truth clarification materials in the countryside, we moved to the urban areas, as most of the local practitioners lived in the city. We put our attention on neighborhoods that were difficult to access and delivered truth clarification materials there, which actually did not demand too much time or effort.
How to Assign Tasks and Harmonize the Fa to Save People
It is not easy to successfully implement all the projects that one is involved in. As more Dafa projects were needed, we tried to ensure the quality of both new and existing projects. The technical capability of local practitioners became a critical issue. Master has given us an example of how to be more professional in our Dafa work by leading Shen Yun Performing Arts. So I started to work on myself, choosing the areas that I was familiar with. I did research on the Clearwisdom website and learned from fellow practitioners, which resulted in an improvement of my technical knowledge and skills. Then a practitioner suggested that I train more practitioners to handle technical issues in Dafa work. When I initially did this, it did not work out well. Some practitioners had personal concerns, some did not want to learn and others learned bits but found it hard to continue. Therefore, only the few of us who had initiated the project still remained.
I looked inward to find the reasons why we were struggling with this problem. I knew that I had a tendency of telling other practitioners what to do; something that came from my attachment of placing myself above others. Master said:
“... all activities should be organized according to local conditions and students’ situations, instead of being made absolute. Even learning Dafa is voluntary, not to mention organizing activities!” (“Clearheadedness” from Essentials for Further Advancement)
Following Master's teachings, I found that the answer was obvious. As everyone had their own preferences, strengths and own cultivation path, he or she would be able to use the strengths to play a unique role in Dafa work. When we needed to do certain things, fellow practitioners would do what they could to cooperate well with one another. Some had the patience and knowledge to deal with technical issues, some possessed the business skills to purchase supplies and materials, while others had outgoing personalities and found coordination work easy to carry out. Not everyone is needed in each project, just like Master said in his comment on a practitioner's article, “Do Not Differentiate Between Fa-Rectification Projects; “A Great Way Has No Form” But Exists As a Whole:”
“Different approaches are in fact the all-encompassing way in which roles are dynamically distributed in the operations of the Fa, and the Fa-power is a reflection of the one body.” (“Master's Comment on a Student's Article”)
Letting Go of the Attachment to Human Emotion
The affection between husband and wife was my greatest attachment during the time when I was homeless, while feelings for my parents and child appeared the most noticeable when I was able to return home. When I was held in a forced labor camp, I dreamed several times that my elderly mother had rescued me from there. My wife and I now experience many xinxing tests regarding the relationship with our parents.
For example, I considered my wife, who is also a practitioner, to have been too attached to her parents, whereas she thought the same about me. We have often fought over this issue, forgetting that we are practitioners. When I looked inward, I found that I was not tolerant as required by the principle of Ren (forbearance) - “To endure completely without anger or grievance is the forbearance of a cultivator.” (“What is Forbearance [Ren]?” from Essentials for Further Advancement).
Sometimes I stopped fighting with her, but I was unable to sincerely let it go. Because I have not seriously been dealing with my emotional attachments, the conflicts between my wife and me still remain. Knowing my mistakes is not enough, though, as following Dafa's principles and letting go of human notions are the key to generating righteous thoughts. Otherwise, it will be just like some Catholics that go to confess in church, but then continue to commit wrongdoings after they leave. Genuine cultivation of Dafa is represented in every little moment of our lives.
My emotional attachments towards my parents are another trial on my cultivation path, particularly in the process of looking for a job. Thanks to my parents' social network, after graduating from school, I received an offer to work in a government department. This was regarded by most people as a highly beneficial but competitive position. All that I needed to do to get the job was to write or say something against my will, to renounce my belief in Falun Dafa to the officials at the local 610 Office. I did not want to do this, because I knew that both lying and denouncing Dafa are against Dafa's principles. But seeing my parents' disappointment and their being upset, I was hurt inside. On one hand, I realized that I had been affected by human notions; on the other hand, I firmly believed that it was not right even from an ordinary person's perspective to force someone to lie or renounce his or her belief against their will. Thus, I wanted to reason with people, including my parents, using righteous thoughts and rational thinking about Dafa and the persecution. The process of getting the job became one of clarifying the truth to different people, ranging from government officials to my family members. Although I still haven't gotten the job, my xinxing has been cultivated through the trials. Master said:
“Under normal circumstances you don't have the opportunity--if you just pull someone over to tell them the facts you might feel a bit awkward, right?” (“Teaching and Explaining the Fa at the Metropolitan New York Fa Conference”)
My attachments also revealed a certain amount of communist ideology. For example, I had been raising my child in a controlling manner, and did not consider him as a sentient being to be saved. I applied the communist concept of “controlling” when handling cross-generation relations, thinking of myself as superior to my child due to my age, experience, and position as his parent. I also criticized and denounced my child in family meetings, as part of my “disciplining” him. This was apparently from the Chinese Communist Party's “fighting” philosophy. Furthermore, I realized that I had been selfishly trying to train my child to be what I wanted him to be. My child is actually a young fellow practitioner and I should have assisted him in cultivation, instead of forcing him to be what I wanted him to be from my understanding of the Fa at that time. While I am writing about this topic, I realize that my enlightenment about how to treat my child is also applicable to learning how to better work with fellow practitioners and how to promote the awareness of Dafa among everyday people. This is why, in my understanding, we have to explain things to everyday people according to their notions and attachments.
Looking Inward to Eliminate the Gap Between Practitioners
My wife had been reminding me to take lightly the title of being a coordinator of Dafa work. However, I did not take it seriously until after one group Fa study, when fellow practitioners and I were discussing the arrest of several practitioners in a neighboring city who had been taken to a brainwashing center. I suggested that we should all look inward to see if we had done anything that was not in line with the Fa. Practitioner A disagreed with me and said that we needed to strive to negate the old forces. Continuing to argue with practitioners, I regarded them as merely diverse opinions, and not barriers, as we practitioners should be one body. That night I had a dream, in which my brother turned me in to the authorities and I was taken to a detention center. Waking up, I tried to look inward, but could not find what I had done wrong to cause such a bad dream. When I was reading Master's Fa teaching, I suddenly understood the problem:
“There are those who often do things in Master's name, saying, "Master asked me to do such and such," "Master said this and that," or "Master asked you to do this or that." I have never asked anyone to do this or that. Whoever says that is furthering his own ends in Master's name.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2007 New York Fa Conference”)
Had I been using Master's words to criticize other practitioners? That was a serious mistake of mine. When I requested fellow practitioners to look inward for the causes of the arrest of some practitioners, did I also imply that blaming others for their attachments was a trigger for the trouble? Moreover, I had also acknowledged the persecution of the old forces.
The interference from these barriers also emerged in the Fa study groups in terms of security. Practitioner B had developed some distorted understandings of the Fa after he was released from a forced labor camp, and therefore some practitioners were worried about him. Upon learning of a rumor that a person with ill intentions had reported on other practitioners in a neighboring county, the practitioners in our groups became seriously concerned and suggested to put a hold on our regular group Fa study. Right at that time, practitioner B was preparing to re-join our group to study the Fa together. So, what were we to do? Stop the group for the sake of security, or continue in order to encourage a lost fellow practitioner's return? We turned to Master's new lecture “Dafa Disciples Must Study the Fa” for guidance.
This was a delicate situation: When we were about to welcome the return of a lost practitioner, the rumor of a “traitor” came up. Apparently the old forces tried to interfere with us and cause disorder among our local practitioners as one body. If we had done well and avoided any omissions in our cultivation, there would not have been a chance for any rumors of traitors to exist. An experience sharing article in Minghui Weekly reminded us that fellow practitioners are a reflection for each of us. When we see others' problems, we should look inward and then we will find similar problems within ourselves. Practitioner B thought that his own understanding of the Fa was higher than others'. Was I the same? My heart of arrogance was more hidden. Practitioner B liked only to communicate with Dafa practitioners and not everyday people, much less clarify the facts to them. I often thought about the security issues of different Dafa projects and talking to different people, and sometimes I might avoid talking to those I considered dangerous. Because of my impure human heart and human notions, I encountered those difficult and delicate circumstances. Other practitioners had come to various understandings from their own perspectives through this event as well, and our group made some improvements as a whole body. In the end, a difficult issue resulted in our progress in cultivation.
The above is my enlightenment over the last year. I understand that I have not done very well, but I want to rectify myself in Dafa, catch up with fellow practitioners and become a qualified Dafa disciple in the Fa-rectification period.
Thank you, Master, for your merciful salvation!
Thank you, fellow practitioners, for your selfless assistance!
