(Minghui.org) A few things happened to me recently that made me realize that if I see other people's shortcomings, I should use this opportunity to look at myself to see if I have the same problems, as they are like a mirror's reflection of ourselves.
Being Late to Fa Study
I was going to Fa study with my daughter one morning, and asked her to quickly get ready, but she was still dawdling. When she was eventually ready, there wasn't time for breakfast. So we had to take the food with us and eat on the way.
I was annoyed with her and walked very fast to the bus stop. A bus had just arrived. But when I looked back, my daughter was far away and was walking very slow. I had to wait for her, and we missed the bus.
We didn't talk to each other when we got on the next bus. I tried to control myself and not to complain. Though I was quiet, my thinking didn't stop. I thought that for the next Fa study, I would leave on time. If you are late, you'd better go on your own. But I knew if that were the case, she probably wouldn't go.
I realized that I was being impatient and selfish. I had an attachment of caring about losing face, because I didn't want people sitting there waiting for us. And I would feel embarrassed if I went into the room after they started reading, and everyone's attention would be on us.
I knew I had a lack of compassion. I need to cultivate myself to have more patience and increase my capacity of endurance. I thought: I didn't want to give up on her, not because she is my daughter, but because she was a relative of Master, she is also a practitioner.
I looked at my watch while we were waiting for the elevator.
“What time is it?” She asked me.
“We are 10 minutes late.” I replied. I didn't want to say much.
I later told a practitioner about this. The practitioner said: “You didn't think about why your daughter dawdled. It's because you are not on time either.”
I felt ashamed when the practitioner pointed out my problem. How could I forget to look inward? When a conflict happens between our family members, we often neglect to look at ourselves.
Finding My Own Problems when Working with Practitioners
One practitioner's case had been passed to the local court. The judge informed the lawyer about the date of the trial, but the date clashed with the lawyer's schedule, as he was dealing with another case at that time. So he couldn't attend the trial.
This lawyer asked another lawyer friend to help, but it involved transferring the files and an additional cost. So we discussed the issue with the lawyer and the practitioner's family. In the end, we reached an agreement.
After that, the practitioner involved with the case didn't pay the lawyer. During that time, I asked this practitioner a few times about following up with the new lawyer, but this practitioner hadn't done it.
A month later, another practitioner and I found that the lawyer hadn't received the money. He wasn't happy and complained about it. This practitioner then complained about me. I was quite upset and thought that it wasn't my fault.
I was going to visit the lawyer with the practitioner who was directly involved the case, but after withdrawing money from the bank, he suddenly said with grievance that he wanted to go home to study the Fa. I was shocked. I knew that he had moved and didn't have much time to study the Fa, so I said: “All right. It is more important to study the Fa. I will go and pay the fees to the lawyer.” When I talked to the practitioner, my mind wasn't pure.
On the way, I thought I had attachments of being irresponsible and dependent on others. I knew the telephone number of the arrested practitioner's family, so why did I wait for another practitioner to do it? Why couldn't I do it myself?
Master said:
“Actually, though, as a Dafa disciple, if in such cases your thoughts are righteous, and what you are thinking about is cultivation, about being responsible, and about how it’s something that should be done well, then you should quietly take whatever it is that you feel is lacking and do it well. That is in fact how a Dafa disciple should handle it.” ("Be More Diligent" from Teaching the Fa the Conference X)
The practitioner's complaint made me realize that I have an attachment of not wanting people to criticize me, and a combative mentality. The practitioner who had a grievance had just shown that I had the same attachment. When I tried to explain things, that was my attachment of arguing. This practitioner's grievance exactly reflected the same problem I had.
I started looking within and eliminated the old forces' interference at the same time. I thanked Master for giving me the opportunity to find my problems and cultivate myself.
Cherishing Every Opportunity to Cultivate
We normally get feedback about the detained practitioner's situation from the lawyer after they visited him/her. I used to think, whether it is good or not good, that reflects the detained practitioner's cultivation state. I realized that I needed to change my thinking.
A lawyer visited the practitioner and told us that he helped other detainees raise money. Though the lawyer didn't tell us the details, this practitioner was involved in everyday people's affairs, and neglected to do what we are supposed to do.
However, after listening to this, I found that I was in the same state. It was really a warning for me to rectify myself.
I need to change my mindset. I should change how I look at others, and start using it as a mirror to find my own shortcomings.
Category: Improving Oneself
