My Understanding About Resentment

(Minghui.org) We were all shocked when a practitioner in our Fa study group suddenly passed away. Looking back, there could be many reasons why she died. To me, the attachment to resentment was one of them.

Her mother-in-law passed away many years ago but she still resented her. She often talked about how badly her mother-in-law treated her, and this resentment became a knot in her heart. One day, when we were reading the Fa, she started coughing and drank some water to ease it. Later, she had a physical checkup before going abroad for a family visit and was told there were nodules in her lungs. When her condition worsened, we reminded her about holding onto resentment. She agreed, but still couldn’t let it go.

Master said in one of his recent articles,

“Why are the old forces so harsh on Dafa disciples? On the one hand, it’s done out of jealousy; on the other hand, they look down on certain Dafa disciples whose human attachments are too many and too strong, who don’t handle things according to the Fa when encountering situations, and who look at issues from the perspective of their human attachments. Thus, those who don’t do well will have big tribulations, and if it goes on like that for a long time, it’s very dangerous!” (Cultivation in Dafa Is Serious)

Reflections on the Harm Resentment Causes

Looking back, I see that resentment brought great harm to practitioners. Some developed resentment because their husbands had an affair; others felt their mothers-in-law were nit-picky and unfair; and some resented their siblings, relatives, or friends due to conflicts of interest or offensive remarks, etc.

Over the years, a few practitioners in our area either passed away or stopped practicing. One of the main causes was their attachment to resentment. When they encountered specific issues, they did not handle them on the basis of the Fa but treated them with an everyday person’s mentality. As a result, those issues became unsolvable knots in their hearts, which were taken advantage of by the evil and resulted in severe tribulations. What happened to them also had a significant negative impact on the people around them and was used by the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) to slander Dafa and hinder our efforts to save sentient beings.

I realize that cultivation is a long process of getting rid of attachments, and it’s also a process of changing from being immature to being mature. Through the CCP the old forces persecute Dafa disciples using the excuse of “testing” them. If we fail to regard ourselves as practitioners in cultivation, and our main consciousness is not in control based on the Fa, then our old, stubborn human notions will prevail and dominate, and we may meet with unexpected troubles.

The purpose of writing this sharing article is to remind myself to learn from the painful lessons of other practitioners, to constantly measure myself with Dafa’s standards while eliminating my ordinary people’s notions and attachments, to clearly understand the seriousness of cultivation, and to do my best to act according to the standards of a cultivator.

Reflecting on My Resentment

I used to think I didn’t have resentment. But when I thought about what happened to fellow practitioners, I realized that I should reflect on myself and look within. When I carefully thought it over, I realized that there was an element of resentment in my interactions with others.

For example, one day, my husband and I went to a street market to clarify the truth. While waiting for the bus to return home, he did not do something the way I suggested, and I felt a bit resentful.

Another time, my husband asked our daughter to come over and help make rice dumplings. While making the dumplings, she played some music I didn’t like, very loudly, which made me feel resentful toward my husband. After she left I complained about his indifference and blamed him for not admonishing our daughter for playing the music.

COVID spread rapidly in 2020, so I bought three extra bags of rice in preparation for a lockdown. One day, in the winter of 2023, my husband shouted, “We have rats in the house and they have eaten through the rice bags! Come and take a look at the rice you bought.”

I saw that two of the three bags had big holes. My husband thought I shouldn’t have stored so much rice and complained. I argued that I did the right thing and it was unfair of him to blame me. Again, I felt resentful.

In one of the many reforms the CCP launched, it carried out the “Land Reform” to eliminate the “landlord class.” Because my family had a few acres of land and hired people to help with the farm work, my family was almost labeled a “class enemy” for being “rich peasants.” Later, the CCP confiscated all our land, and my family barely made a living by working on other farms. My family’s cemetery was given to farmers from another village to grow crops on. Our ancestral graves were demolished, and our family was no longer able to sweep our ancestors’ graves and honor them. If I had not practiced Falun Dafa, it would be impossible for me not to hold resentment and deep hatred for the CCP.

I realized that I felt resentment in my daily life, and it became a habit. I felt a bit resentful when I did not get any return for the efforts I put in; I felt resentful when others said or did things that conflicted with my interests, whether in material terms or reputation; and I harbored resentment when something did not conform to my wishes and ideas.

A Deeper Understanding of Resentment

I understand that jealousy and resentment are evil because they are the opposite of kindness which is virtuous. Jealousy arises when you do not want others to surpass you, and resentment comes when we suffer a loss. Both jealousy and resentment are related to selfishness. When what others say or do fails to conform to our ideas, we feel uncomfortable, unbalanced, and are unwilling to accept it.

In order to vent hatred and anger, resolve grievances, or avoid being taken advantage of, we tend to find reasons to justify our inappropriate actions. Sometimes, we argue with others; sometimes we endure it on the surface in order to save face, or we keep it inside and do not say anything but feel unhappy or annoyed inside. When conflicts and grievances accumulate, they may cause us to explode. Some people cannot stand being wronged, and when they can’t hold back, they vent their anger on others, stir up trouble, create conflicts, increase karma, and so on.

When resentment arises, it’s often accompanied by jealousy, a competitive mentality, wanting to show off, etc. It’s related to many human attachments. As Dafa disciples, we must let go of all these human attachments through cultivation and meet the requirements of the Fa.

Resentment is a strong attachment and a human emotion that is based on selfishness and ego, and is a selfish characteristics of the old universe. It’s not only formed by one incident; it can be repeatedly reinforced during our countless lifetimes. It has formed a very stubborn notion and is allowed to manifest fully in the CCP culture.

Sometimes, I found it hard to calm down while doing the exercises and kept thinking about other things I was involved in. What will happen if I hold resentment when practicing the exercises? Master can’t transform resentment into gong. This could be more serious than “practicing evil cultivation” that Master talked about in Zhuan Falun, and the consequences could be truly disastrous.

Resentment, like all other attachments, is something that practitioners must eliminate. Resentment and hatred are the opposite of Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance.

Of course, when interacting with people or other practitioners, it’s only natural that we may have different views about things. Through sharing, we can help each other and improve together. Such interactions are free from resentment.

Letting Go of Resentment

Resentment is a strong attachment and a stubborn notion. To let go of such a human attachment and notion, we must do well the three things that Master requires us to do and remember the magic tool of looking within in cultivation.

First, let’s talk about sending righteous thoughts. Since resentment is a stubborn notion that has accumulated over many years, and it’s a substance and a living being, it’s necessary to clear this bad element from ourselves.

When sending righteous thoughts, we must also eliminate the evil specter of the CCP, as well as the dark minions, rotten demons, and all evil elements that undermine Dafa. Since these bad things were formed over a long period, layer by layer, we need to send righteous thoughts many times to eliminate them completely. If we don’t eradicate them, the old forces will use them as a reason to persecute us.

Of course, resentment is not the only attachment Dafa disciples need to eliminate in cultivation. I’m only talking about my understanding of this one harmful attachment. There are many kinds of attachments we must eliminate through cultivation. We need to be vigilant about every thought we have when encountering issues and check whether it’s a human notion or one’s true self. Is it in line with the Fa principles? If it’s a human notion, we should immediately eliminate it.

Clarifying the truth to save sentient beings is what every Dafa disciple should do. Only by holding ourselves to the Fa requirements and showing the great kindness we have cultivated in Dafa can we truly save sentient beings. Can a person who harbors resentment, hatred, and bad thoughts save sentient beings? It is absolutely impossible.

One practitioner in our area was unlawfully detained in a detention center and viciously beaten by a few police officers. One officer shouted, “Strip off her clothes and beat her to death!” She thought, “I’ve already let go of life and death. Why does the evil still want to kill me? If I’m dead, how can I save sentient beings?” As soon as she had this thought, the police changed their minds and took her back to her cell. Her thought of saving sentient beings at that critical moment saved her from being killed.

Another practitioner in my area had a severe toothache one day. She thought, “My teeth also play a role in saving sentient beings.” So she said to the aching tooth, “Falun Dafa is good. Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance is good.” Almost instantly, her toothache stopped.

These are just a couple of examples that show the importance of keeping the Fa in mind at critical moments. We must study the Fa well and act according to the Fa principles. When encountering setbacks, tribulations, or when things that don’t go our way, as long as we can remember the Fa principles Master taught, all those human attachments, such as resentment, hatred, jealousy, etc., will be cleared out quickly, because the Fa is omnipotent.

The few local practitioners who passed away could not let go of their resentment. Being Dafa practitioners, they must have been aware of their attachment. However, their ordinary human notions might have been too strong, and they could not get over the hurdle. In the end, their human notions prevailed and became dominant and their main consciousnesses (the part that had been cultivated well) failed to be in control. So, the evil took advantage of the opportunity to intensify it’s persecution.

I also realized that the level of one’s cultivation, the degree of one’s belief in the Fa, one’s steadfastness, and the size of the tribulations one encounters are all related to one’s faith in Master and the Fa and how much they have assimilated to the Fa.

If one doesn’t believe in Master and the Fa or holds the slightest doubt, one is not a Dafa disciple. It won’t do if we fail to fulfill the vows we made to Master eons ago.

Studying the Fa is very important, and we must to do it well in order to improve. Only when we have 100 percent faith in Dafa can we study the Fa well. If you don’t study the Fa, you will not know the Fa and, of course, will be at a loss when encountering problems.

Practitioners all read and study the Fa, and they know the Fa principles. However, when they come across problems, if they cannot remember the Fa or act according to the Fa principles, it means that they have yet to truly assimilate to the Fa.

Only by keeping the Fa firmly in our hearts and applying the Fa principles in everything we say and do can we truly assimilate to Dafa. Master has repeatedly reminded us to study the Fa more and study the Fa well. Without the guidance of Dafa, we cannot cultivate at all.

Master arranges everything about our cultivation. Therefore, any tribulations or unpleasant things we experience in life are for our improvement. We will never know just how much sacrifice and suffering Master endured to help us improve and reach consummation. We feel eternally grateful to Master.