My Home Environment Changed for the Better When I Rectified Myself

(Minghui.org) I really regret what I did yesterday. Earlier, I heard that my son would be taking my granddaughter to watch a cartoon movie comprised of Chinese Communist Party propaganda. I tried to stop them from going to see this movie by threatening to stop cooking for them. They went anyway. Three days passed, and my son did not seem to take any notice of me.

I was furious about his behavior. So, as soon as I got up yesterday, I sent a text message trying to make him understand that what he did was wrong. He replied: “When someone is too naive and boring, it’s best to ignore her, otherwise one would be dragged down to the same level.”

I became even more annoyed and inquired: “Do you know what kind of person looks down upon others?” He escalated the problem by replying with disrespectful and insulting answers and ended the conversation.

I thought to myself that even world leaders respect and cherish their mothers, but my son looked down on me like this! He was the one who begged me to come to America to help look after his daughter. I have been here for nine years now and helped them move to new houses eight times. I have taken care of all the household chores while helping bring up the child. I never expected that my son would look down on me this way. To him, I am not even as good as a useless housemaid!

The more I thought this way, the more I felt unbalanced, so I started to write down all my son’s unfilial behaviors. I spent the whole afternoon writing down my son’s faults and my grievances. Even when it was time for sending forth righteous thoughts my mind was still on what I was writing!

After sending forth righteous thoughts, suddenly I thought of what Master said,

“While working, your tone of voice, your kindheartedness, and your reasoning can change a person’s heart, whereas commands never could!”(“Clearheadedness” in Essentials For Further Advancement)

I was shocked.What have I been doing all day? I racked my brains trying to dig out all the old stuff of how my son was “unfilial” to me over the years. I acted like an everyday person instead of a Dafa practitioner. Quickly, I deleted everything I had written against my son, and almost instantly, I felt clearheaded and light all over.

I also remembered what a new practitioner said in her sharing a couple of days earlier, “Jealousy, I hate you! I want to rid myself of you completely.” But I’m still struggling in the realm of a “wicked person.” I talk about “looking within, and cultivating myself” every day, and yet my behavior was uncharacteristic of a practitioner. Every test is serious in Dafa cultivation, and if one looks outward, one would behave like a constant complainer. My human attachments are harming me, yet I am still complaining about my son.

I am grateful to Master Li for helping me become more clearheaded and realize my deeply rooted jealousy and selfish human notions. The Fa principles have helped me realize my human attachments, such as feeling aggrieved and furious about “unfair” treatment and thinking that my son was not worthy of my sacrifices. These attachments impacted how my son and granddaughter acted toward me. They were actually helping me to reflect upon myself.

With this realization, all my anger and grievances disappeared, and I no longer wanted to nitpick my son and granddaughter. A few days ago, my son purchased two new cell phones for me online, and both have arrived today. My son helped me move all the apps and settings from my old phone to the new ones.

In the evening, after my granddaughter came home from school, she ran to me and showed me the painting and paper crafts she had done at school. She also asked, “Grandma, how come you are cooking for us again?

“Because I love you,” I replied. She looked surprised. So I explained to her, “Even though you and your dad didn’t listen to me, I must listen to what my Master has taught me. I must have love for all people.” Upon hearing this, my granddaughter ran off and returned with a chocolate cookie, “Grandma, open your mouth and have a bite of this.” She pushed the cookie into my mouth with a big smile on her face. I felt so happy.

I am so very grateful to Master Li for helping me elevate in Falun Dafa cultivation practice!